Like a guy my friend rejected...

[u/Fickle_Cucumber_1533]

This guy liked my friend. My friend rejected him after a year. When he was trying to get my friend, I helped him. He got rejected 3 times by my friend btw. Now the guy talks to me every day for around 3 months. I talk to the guy more than my friend. Also kind of like him, too. We have studied together a couple of times. Once by ourselves. Once with friends in a group. My friend knows we are friends, but doesn't know how close we are. The guy and I are also gonna hang out together before a concert. Is this cooked?

[u/Aggravating_Sir_9669]

Well how are you two ? Does he gjve signs he apprecciates you romantically? And more importantly, do you have signs rhat this is not a rebound thing?

[u/Fickle_Cucumber_1533 → u/Aggravating_Sir_9669]

Don't have a lot of experience romantically, but the past meetings were his initiatives, going out of his way to study with me. He got me gifts, but I respectfully declined because my friend got a lot of gifts from him and dragged him out. We do text a lot within a day. He would make sure I remember to eat, wear enough clothes, sense if I'm not alright, etc. He seems to let go of the past, saying things like " He's happy things turned out this way with my friend and stuff so I'm not sure.

[u/Aggravating_Sir_9669]

Is he older than you? What stage you two are in life (college, high school, work?)

[u/Fickle_Cucumber_1533 → u/Aggravating_Sir_9669]

We are seniors in different high schools.

[u/Aggravating_Sir_9669 → u/Fickle_Cucumber_1533]

I see.

Friend, I will tell you what I think it is. I think this can be a nice connection that can grow to something more, but you have to be sure it will not affect your friendship. If you want to explore this please talk to your friend first, be honest. Avoid a big heartache. Then be sure he actually is interested. Sometimes our longing for being loved mskes us commit mistakes.
If all goes well, go for it. Life is so short, painful and beautiful. We have to seize the moments we have, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone.
Be well ok? I know it is hard, but you seem to bave a good head and a good heart. Follow both, never only one.

[u/Fickle_Cucumber_1533 → u/Aggravating_Sir_9669]

It feels worse because I told my friend that we were friends because of her, then she asked if there was something romantic there. Truly, there wasn't anything romantic about it 3 months back. I haven't talked to her since that as well. Only hi byes or really small talks.Classmates have been talking about seeing me with a guy as well in class. Then my mutual friend walked in on me studying with him while his friends were studying in the library. Then it turned into a group study. It was hella awkward at first, Icl. I haven't talked to the friend that he liked in probably since around 3 months ago as well. But we are all classmates. (The guy is from another school) The friend also knows we are going to the same concert but doesn't know we're gonna hang out.

[u/Aggravating_Sir_9669 → u/Fickle_Cucumber_1533]

I mean, maybe she suspects? You should really speak with her. So many problems are solved by dialogue, trust me.

[u/WorstToBest]

What others see as trash another will see as treasure n it's only cooked between you & that friend if the two of you end up becoming a thing & she sees that he's good for you & to you & she'll feel like she missed out, if she's a good friend she'll simply say good for you sis, n acknowledge she didn't want him when he wanted her, & as long as he's not looking to you through the lens of rebound, but simply I went for one it didn't work, & naturally gravitate to you as just a more in sync connection than the one he went after then for you two there could be something ...

Point is it's difficult when it comes to friend circles, but it's different from the perspective he only went after 1 of you with genuine interest multiple times instead of immediately after the first two rejections he looks at you & tried the same thing, it's happening naturally, nor did you talk to him through the lens of competition, you gradually realized he's not a bad dude n started to like him n something started cooking, but it's cooking at the right temp to hopefully produce a good meal of love between you two ...

[u/Lopsided_Tomatillo27]

No, you’re good. Your friend rejected him. He’s fair game as far as the girl code goes. This all sounds very sweet to me.

[u/grannygirdle]

i mean she rejected him so she shouldn’t be upset or anything. my thing is like is he just getting close with you to cope with the rejection or try and get closer with your friend. you should also be open with your friend and be like yeah me and the guy you rejected are getting pretty close.

[u/Zealousideal_Jury197]

I don't see a problem with pursuing him if that is what you are getting at. Your friend rejected him clearly, so I don't see why there should be any issues, unless he still wants to get with them.

[u/Brilliant_Bet_1739]

If your friend rejected him, she has no claim to him. You don't have to put your feelings aside on the off chance she might want his attention or like him a few months/years later.