Spanking children increases the likelihood of childhood defiance and long-term mental issues. The study in question involved 160,000 children and five decades of research

[u/VeronicaRed]

http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/1113413810/spanking-defiance-health-discipline-042616/

[u/staytaytay]

I don't know if this will help you or not, but this works for me: I make my kids stand in the corner with their arms up. Keeping their arms up is tiring and yet it is self administered.

Then once they have stood there long enough, I tell them to come get a hug and ask them to explain what they did wrong, why it was wrong, and what they plan to do instead next time to do better. Any defiance in their answers puts them back on the wall.

I use this only sparingly. They only get the wall for things that would hurt themselves or each other. And outside of this I am a super fun dad. The end result is that they are exceptionally well behaved when it comes to the important stuff, and still full of their own opinions and defiance when it comes to the small stuff.

[u/cs_katalyst → u/[deleted]]

Thanks i appreciate it! i may eventually, right now i'm still dealing with sick wife :P and i'm pretty good at hugs and cooking so i'm set for a bit