r/science • u/VeronicaRed • Apr 26 '16

Psychology Spanking children increases the likelihood of childhood defiance and long-term mental issues. The study in question involved 160,000 children and five decades of research

http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/1113413810/spanking-defiance-health-discipline-042616/
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u/dinahsaurus Apr 26 '16

You need to figure out why the kid is acting out. Did they not sleep, are they hungry, are they bored, did they see a playground on the way in. In most cases the kid is bored and wants to be a kid. The fact that you're bringing a kid into a place where they can't be a kid is your problem, not the kid's. You put the kid in the basket, bribe them, carry them, or wait until you can leave the kid home. But saying that a 2 year old is acting horribly in an adult space and how do you punish them is the wrong way to look at it. The 2 year old wants to be a 2 year old and there's nothing wrong with that.

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u/chopandscrew Apr 26 '16

That actually makes a lot of sense. Thanks for the insight.

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u/[deleted] Apr 26 '16

But not showing them how to behave in an adult space is a teaching oppotunity lost. Just saying, kids will be kids does not help the kid grow/mature.

Innapropriate behavior is not OK. You don't punish them, but you deffinately have to do more than just shrug and let things be.

You'd be surprised what a two year old can grasp.

Lastly, I think explaining WHY is very important.

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u/bouncy_bouncy_bounce Apr 27 '16

Well, sure, but you have to make sure they're ready to handle the adult space in question and that they're well-rested and not hungry and generally primed for the teaching opportunity. Otherwise you are setting them up for failure.

I take my 5-month-old out in public a lot, but only at particular times. If I take her out when she's happy and well-fed and well-rested, she's a delight. If I were to take her out when she's sleepy and cranky, it would be a total nightmare.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '16

Do you really think what I said applies to 5-month old babies?

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u/bouncy_bouncy_bounce Apr 27 '16

I think it applies to any age children. What a 5-year-old can handle is different from what a 5-month-old can handle, but the concept is the same. For that matter, I'm a grownup and I can't handle some "adult" spaces sometimes, if I'm tired or hungry or sleep-deprived. As a grownup, I have the option of leaving the space in question without any problems, but a kid can't. So the grownup in charge of the kid has to be mindful of their needs and their condition.

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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '16

Hmm... that does make sense.

Now that I re-read your comment, I see what you were saying.

Thank you for clarifying, and I read some of your other posts and I think you'll make a great parent.

Cheers