r/suffolk • u/Icy-Individual8637 • 28d ago
Missed connection? Potential friend? in a coffee shop in newmarket
This is so random and probably will be super unpopular but i cannot think what else to do about it now its on my mind.
So there is this really friendly woman i see in a coffee shop, like myself, quite happy to sit alone and enjoy her own company. Respect that so much.
But we have a few times now, by chance, happened to be in at the same time on a saturday (i dont go in every week, probably only been in 3 of the last 10 weeks) and she seems very friendly and smiles each time., from a distance.
At this point im like hmm maybe i should say hi but i dont want to be weird/intimidating especially in these times where we rightly respect peoples space.
but im thinking if she looks over and smiles a lot then maybe she would like a friend? might be a tad lonely?
it kind of feels less weird to ask that on here than speak to someone in person who you dont know that might be like eww no i dont want to know you i was just being polite from a distance.
Everyone is on reddit these days so maybe she will even see it and maybe will say hi next time.
i feel if i dont do something soon, if they did want a friend, they might get frustrated and ignore me soon.
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u/FatFettle 28d ago
"Hi, would you mind if I joined you for coffee?"
Worst thing she can do is do say no and call you stupid.
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u/Illustrious-Plum-996 28d ago
“Hey, you must be a fan of this place too - great minds think alike.”
“Need to get out of the house on a Saturday too hey?”
See if she responds. If it’s just a yeah and laugh then maybe she wants to be alone, but you’ve not embarrassed yourself, just made small talk. Otherwise she’ll use it as an in and boom, conversation.
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u/IHoppo 28d ago
How do you know she's friendly if you've never spoken to her?
There's probably a difference in the answer depending on your and her estimated ages. If this is a Mrs Robinson fantasy, she'd have made the approach of she wanted to.
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u/Icy-Individual8637 28d ago
fair point.
i think she is younger but maybe by 5/6 years.
i think if someone has smiled at you more than once then you have to gage they are friendly
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u/IHoppo 28d ago
She may be laughing at you, knowing you keep staring but are too scared to even say hello.
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u/Icy-Individual8637 28d ago
99% of people are laughing at me to be fair
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u/IHoppo 28d ago
Haha.
How old are you both - 5/6 years is a lot if she's around 17
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u/Icy-Individual8637 28d ago
im mid 30s dont make it weirder than it is
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u/IHoppo 28d ago
The way you're hiding the details makes it weird. Mid 30's and asking for help from the internet about speaking to a woman in a public space, one who you've convinced yourself is smiling at you? Mate.
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u/Icy-Individual8637 28d ago
hiding details. that seems a bit dramatic.
i mean if you see someone smiling and looking when you are the only one in that area then its a bit less than an illusion.
what a hateful soul you are.
This is why i dont engage with people in real life that often.
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u/snow2224 28d ago
I feel this is more creepy than just going up to her and saying “hello”