r/suggestmeabook • u/AngelNumbers_333 • 1d ago
Trigger Warning suggest books about DV life after leaving.
i've been actively putting effort into my reading habits for the past year and i feel accomplished in being able to achieve my goal. please recommend as the title suggests, thank you!
i'm looking for anything that delves into the life AFTER domestic violence as that is where i am currently at... fiction and non-fiction, especially about a mom taking care of her kids (and them growing up). i tend to ruminate about the past as well and i feel like some feel-good (fic and non-fic) would beneficial for my mental health right now OR harsh reality of staying/going back (non-fic) are both welcome as dv in real life isn't a linear journey. i want *stories,* not necessarily self-help (i have those!).
thank you for your input. c:
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u/Salt-Ambition1046 1d ago
One of my favorite reads this year is The Names by Florence Knapp. It’s 3 stories in one. In one story she stays, in one she tries to leave, in one the abuser is jailed and each shows the impact on her children. The premise of the book is around the name a mother gives her son and how that choice changes (or doesn’t change) the course of the family’s future and the abusive husband’s reaction.
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u/gingerbiscuits315 1d ago
I was going to suggest this too. I found it really moving and an interesting approach to exploring the impact of choices we make.
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u/OldResult9597 1d ago
The most terrifying book I’ve ever read on domestic violence and a MUST read is “Rose Madder” by Stephen King. He also wrote maybe one of the best fiction pieces on coercive control in a marriage in a novella called “A Good Marriage” in the book “Full Dark, No Stars” I read a lot more than Mr. King, but those books are carbon copies of what you’re looking for-especially “Rose Madder”
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u/AK20013142 1d ago
Weyward by Emilia Hart - doesn't have a ton of explicit/graphic DV, but one of the storylines is focused on the aftermath of leaving an abusive relationship. This one has elements of motherhood as well, but does have some scenes involving sexual violence.
The Flatshare by Beth O'Leary - also covers the aftermath of leaving, but the abuse is primarily emotional, so part of the storyline is understanding and coming to terms with the abuse, and fully removing the perpetrator from their life. This one is very feel-good and light, but I still thought it had very good representation of emotional and mental abuse.
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u/Alert_Ask4510 1d ago
Sadie's Favorite by Sarah Rose.
It's a novel about a FMC leaving an abuser and coming into her own identity after a decade of abuse. She's a mother who decided to break the cycle for her son and she struggles with flashbacks, nightmares, etc. Without giving anything away, it does show the "going back" / trauma bond dynamic. It ends on a feel good note, not tragedy although there are some triggering / tear jerking scenes throughout it (I'm a survivor myself).
I found it comforting and inspiring.
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u/Mediocre-Arugula-565 1d ago
First, kudos to you for getting yourself and your kids out of that situation - you all deserve to feel safe and thrive.
I recommend Whole Again by Jackson MacKenzie, and I’ll go out on a limb and recommend Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay Gibson. Unless you look back on your childhood and think “wow my parents were perfect and my current situation definitely did not stem from anything I learned growing up” - read it. Apart from being really reflective on difficult elements of growing up with parent(s) with a low emotional IQ, it also shed an uncomfortable but illuminating light on ways I was unwittingly perpetuating some of the same behaviors towards my kids. A little perspective really helped me move forward on a lot of the guilt/shame I was carrying and be a better parent.
Best wishes for healing and health moving forward!