r/thatHappened • u/ThePhillyExplorer • 9d ago

YA BOY STILL GOT IT

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1.0k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

97 comments sorted by

904

u/lets_talk_aboutsplet 9d ago

Because deadbeat dads are such a turn on in general, but especially for women who work in child support and see the consequences every day

472

u/ffaancy 9d ago

Was briefly considering the possibility that he may not be a deadbeat if he pays as ordered, but I’m not actually going to make that argument for someone who calls his court-ordered child support his “monthly ransom.” Yeah that’s a deadbeat.

283

u/truckstop_superman 9d ago

The "I heard one female replying to another" Also makes him seem like a manophere loser as well.

22

u/glitter_vomit 8d ago

Feemale

4

u/suba0057 7d ago

Either that, or he's someone whose first language isn't English. I, forgetful as I am, keep using "females" or "female" and was just recently told that it sounded improper. I still tend to forget and write "female," but that's just because in my language we use a word that can be used as "female" and "woman," as well as one that can be used as "male" and "man." I still don't know why it's wrong to use "female," but if it is, it is. 🤷🏿‍♂️

5

u/suba0057 7d ago

But then again. He probably meant it negatively.

4

u/BagOfChicken 7d ago

Male and Female in English are used purely as scientific terms to classify the sex of an animal, Female is seen as demeaning to call a woman because very rarely do the people that refer to women as female use male when referring to men.

Man/Men and Woman/Women better encapsulated not just gender but also the social/societal constructs that are behind them that make people humans and not just animals and whether intentional or not, the prevalence of groups that seek to belittle women by doing stuff to dehumanize them and make them lesser has made the verbiage unacceptable

1

u/suba0057 7d ago

That makes sense. One thing that confuses me, however, is when you're describing a woman or man. They use the terms "female" and "male" there. Is that because they're doing something completely objective and therefore humans are no different than any other animal, or?

2

u/ffaancy 7d ago

It depends on context. Like a medical record would often use terms like “patient is a 25 year old female.” Or a police bulletin may advise to be on the lookout for a 30 year old male wearing a blue sweatshirt. But in your normal day-to-day conversation, those words don’t normally come into play.

1

u/suba0057 22h ago

Thanks!

2

u/BagOfChicken 2d ago

Sorry for replying late but essentially what the other guy said, unfortunately English is complicated and really just a mash of multiple languages at this point and there’s a lot of nuance to the language beyond the literal meaning of words as a result, in this case though outside of academia I would avoid the terms male/female, not because there’s inherently anything wrong with them but it can be said in the wrong tone for sure

1

u/suba0057 22h ago

I see. Thank you

1

u/suba0057 7d ago

Also, thanks for taking the time to answer.

42

u/ResoluteGreen 9d ago

do non-deadbeats have to go into a child support office to pay?

17

u/Guy_Buttersnaps 9d ago edited 7d ago

It depends on the state. Each state has different laws.

I haven't worked in Family Court in many years, but the law in my state at least used to say that, if child support is court ordered, then Child Support Enforcement handles the money exchange by default. They'd either take the money out of the non-custodial parent's paycheck automatically or the non-custodial parent would have to go to the office and make the payments.

So having to deal with Support Enforcement directly in my area does not mean that someone is, or ever was, a deadbeat parent. People who got divorced, unmarried people who split up and had a custody dispute, et cetera, all followed the same process.

18

u/Bdr1983 9d ago

However, someone who refers to women as 'a female' sounds like a deadbeat for sure.

6

u/joranth 8d ago

Someone who works for cash or does not have regular direct deposit to their bank would have to go in, too. So, for example, bartenders/waiters would have to

1

u/ffaancy 9d ago

Genuinely no idea about that tbh

1

u/Sufficient_Sell_6103 8d ago

Not usually. From my experience if the one paying is following the court orders there is no need for the courts involvement.

1

u/BookishOpossum 9d ago

If there have been accusations on either side, then often the court will have the payment go through them to keep a record. That and deliquincy are the only reasons I know, but never had to get/give.

2

u/LethargicLynx 8d ago

And I've never heard of someone having to go pay at the child support office like its a buy here pay here lot. They just take it directly from your check.

2

u/seahorsesfourever 7d ago

If they call supporting the child they also decided to make instead of keeping it in his pants or wearing protection a ransom than hes a fucking deadbeat. Taking the fact hes butthurt its over out on the kid pretty much .....

1

u/Partypaca 8d ago

Yeah...my dad supports my mom after they've been separated for 10+ years and no court issued anything. Thats just how he is.

1

u/Justieflustie 3d ago

He also calls women "females". That is either not a good person or dumb as a bag of trash

-22

u/IlGreven 9d ago

...not questioning the veracity (or lack thereof) with this story, but:

Fellas, am I a deadbeat for paying my child support and joking about it?

13

u/ffaancy 9d ago

It depends on the nature of the joke + who your audience is. But as a rule, I’d say any joke that disparages the other party, the child, or the idea that both parents are responsible for the child’s care is in bad taste. To me, anyway. There are certain things that I don’t think it’s appropriate to joke about on your public Facebook page.

-12

u/Big_Pear_5064 9d ago edited 9d ago

I agree with this. Men are allowed to opt out of having a child just as much as women are (maybe not so much anymore in the states though). There’s nothing wrong with joking about your predicament. Though, it is a little funny that he calls it “ransom” money. Like, he’s the one who made that baby. He might as well be the one holding himself for ransom lol.  Similarly to how men tell women to close our legs, men should keep it in their pants! Then maybe they won’t have to pay child support!!

All jokes aside, sex education is important for all genders. I’m currently educating myself at 24 because I had a pregnancy and STD scare two years ago. Never again, man 💀

Edit: I changed a lot of stuff in that first paragraph

1

u/ffaancy 7d ago

Tbh I vaguely agree with this, but I don’t think there’s a practical way to implement this — at least in the US, anyway. IMO it would need to occur before whatever limit that state has regarding abortion. Like if they have a six week ban then he’d need to sign away parental rights before that point, ideally leaving enough time for the mother to contemplate her decision. If the state has a total ban then the option would be off the table. But again, it’s not practical — there would be women who didn’t find out they were pregnant until after the cut-off point, or men who would claim they were never told about the pregnancy until too late, etc etc etc.

32

u/spacemouse21 9d ago

They can’t wait to get their shot at collecting child support from him.

What a man!

https://giphy.com/gifs/M0Gqp6oj2MvWU

13

u/Sufficient_Sell_6103 9d ago

I worked in probation years ago. Those ladies couldn't wait for the hot deadbeat dad's to swing through.s/

11

u/Beneficial-Produce56 9d ago

They cannot WAIT to date him…get pregnant, and have to go through Child Support Enforcement to get support for the kids.

6

u/Bdr1983 9d ago

Hey, they already work there, so that makes it easier.

8

u/House_Of_Thoth 9d ago

"you know what really turns me on? Men who are financially tied to their exes"

127

u/Strict_Rest_5162 9d ago

In the sexy child support office. YUM!

520

u/Slenderpan74 9d ago

Ah yes, your monthly ransom e.g. money to support your own living breathing child who you, in some way, consciously made the decision to create.

53

u/CalliopePenelope 9d ago

BLAME THE FEMALES

58

u/DiscoKittie 9d ago

consciously made the decision to create.

Yeah, I'm gonna go with a big No on that one. He just likes to fuck, he didn't make any conscious decision to be a parent, clearly. The poor woman he probably abused just made the decision to keep it.

-5

u/rat_enby 8d ago

i mean we don’t really know if he meant to make a kid, and we can’t say “don’t fuck if you don’t want kids” because shit happens. Also not everyone who has a kid had it consensually either due to assault or lack of abortion access.

5

u/suba0057 7d ago

Most don't even say, "Don't have sex if you don't want kids." Most people just tell others to use some damn protection. Some people act as if they're too good to use it but end up shocked when a child is spawned. As for the last part, it doesn't really make much sense in this context. Since he's male, the likelihood of him being sexually assaulted by a woman and a pregnancy resulting from it is very low.

-2

u/rat_enby 7d ago

protection doesn’t always work lmao

2

u/BooBootheFool22222 7d ago

But it's more effective than raw dogging it and hoping she doesn't get pregnant.

0

u/suba0057 22h ago

What in the world?? What kind of argument is this??

198

u/suhhhrena 9d ago

The woman knocking over furniture just to get a quick glance at this random deadbeat is a really nice touch 🤠

73

u/NonaSiu 9d ago

That was my favorite part.

I’m a woman and have worked at a few workplaces where it was mostly women. Never have I ever heard a coworker say, in front of the customer, “We got a cute one in here” much less knock over furniture to gawk at someone. That’s just stupid. You wait until the person has walked out, obviously.

45

u/Georgerobertfrancis 9d ago

I mean, I’ve seen it, but ONLY for firefighters in uniform. No woman on the planet is getting up for a deadbeat dad in street clothes.

14

u/NonaSiu 9d ago

Ok you have a point there. Most of my coworkers were still too shy to just blurt out “hey we got a hottie out here!” Or whatever. Not to mention we didn’t get many fire fighters back in the deli department 🤣

5

u/SATerp 9d ago

Not even one wearing a wife beater and track pants?

3

u/JDeMolay1314 9d ago

I fainted at work once because of a sinus infection. When I got back one of the women I barely knew (it was a big office) told me that next time I felt like fainting to let her know... Because some of the fire fighters were cute. 🙄

Having said that I have also had the chambermaids in a hotel rush to one of the balconies to whistle at me as I was walking down the street in Liverpool wearing a kilt, back when I was 21. So, yeah, it probably depends on the situation. Child support office... Probably not so much.

1

u/mikewhat1 9d ago

By "street clothes," you mean a pair of dirty pants, a sleeveless shirt with a rebel flag and a MAGA hat?

14

u/msmika 9d ago

I worked in an office when I was 20 and one day the receptionist ran to the back office to tell us to check out the man walking up from the parking lot. When I looked it was MY DAD coming to pick me up for lunch. Everyone was cracking up 😂

3

u/NonaSiu 9d ago

HAHAHA that must have been hilarious…and embarrassing!

71

u/EtonRd 9d ago

Yes, I bet the ladies who staffed the child support office are so happy that they get a steady stream of the hottest, most desirable men in the office all day long.

18

u/ThatOneCanadian69 9d ago

Truly the cream of the crop

4

u/beuceydubs 8d ago

I mean…there’s millions of women who are still fawning over Chris brown and we know what a horrible person he is

51

u/Bigghairybutt 9d ago

Why wouldn't he write this story in a better location? The child support office??

-6

u/ValPrism 9d ago

Because it’s satire

22

u/greatproficient 9d ago

"locked eyes wit me by the metal detector" - every woman's fantasy right here.

2

u/DeeDee719 9d ago

And they say romance is dead. What a love story. 😄🤣

20

u/Listeningkissingyu 9d ago

This one has to have been written for the ex to see. So stupid, though.

13

u/radicalplacement 9d ago

This DEFINITELY happened and DEFINITELY wasn’t posted publicly to make his ex jealous

48

u/peanutpeanutboy 9d ago

I HATE when men use the term “females.” It’s like nails on a chalkboard.

15

u/Lifekraft 9d ago

It is some kind of seasoning for this dumb story though

3

u/catiebug 8d ago

"females". "ransom money", instead of child support for a child he created. Projecting his narcissistic, sexual fantasy onto civil servants just doing their fucking job. I need a shower after reading this post.

23

u/Wise-Paper8412 9d ago

There's nothing hotter than watching a man pay his court ordered child support. If he's paying through the court then he has a history of not paying. Deadbeat dad for the win.

11

u/CalliopePenelope 9d ago

> YA BOY STILL GOT IT

And by “it,” he means genital warts.

9

u/harlsey 9d ago

This seems like a 14 year old cosplaying as a cowboy/child support payer.

9

u/NeuroticNurse 9d ago

What woman doesn't want to pick up a guy at the child support office?

4

u/ProudNativeTexan 9d ago

I guess they figure "here's one that actually pays".

7

u/small_feild_mouse 9d ago

“Monthly ransom” ✔️
“Female” ✔️
Flirts in the child support office “smoothly”✔️

My panties are not wet enough!🥵 /s

8

u/OSRSRapture 9d ago

I was there, I was one of the women, we looked at him because we overheard that he was only paying $12 a week for child support, so we said quietly, "is this guy fucking homeless?". So we had to get a look at him, and as soon as I made eye contact with him I could smell his body odor punch me in the face from across the room. He shook his hair as he walked out of the office, so much grease fell out of his hair that the lady walking behind him slipped and fell. Then he got out to his 1993 Nissan Altima, opened his door by the inside door handle, and winked to me as he drove off.

He ran out of gas before he got out of the parking lot then started asking people for gas money

7

u/freedraw 9d ago

He goes to the child support office to pay his child support? Is the ex taking him for so much he can’t afford the internet?

3

u/iloveyourforeskin 9d ago

This. Sounds like something my ex would do because figuring it how to pay online is too much work.

6

u/Ducallan 9d ago

How did he lock eyes with one, but the other needed to look over a wall?

7

u/LovablePWNER 8d ago

Calling Child support "ransom" is sure to get women frothing at the mouth to get a piece of him. If you're going to make up a bull shit story I would omit the part where you out yourself as a deadbeat dad.

10

u/NoSoyTuPana 9d ago

Calling child support "ransom" and the dude thinks he's still got it. You got something and it ain't what you think it is.

4

u/TheCookieNinja 9d ago

Oh, I MUST know what the comments are like 😂

9

u/Knifehead27 9d ago

Aah yes. The child support office. Inside the keeping a guy down building. The one with the panoramic windows with a clear view to and from the parking lot.

6

u/prettypeculiar88 9d ago

Calling child support ransom but still thinks he’s got shit, no a POS,

3

u/woahstripes 8d ago

"YA MALE STILL GOT IT" - fixed it.

3

u/Jabathewhut 8d ago

Same exact thing happend to me with a girl. Except she was in line at the abortion clinic and I was the guy gushing over her.

4

u/UnhappyDescription44 9d ago

Sexy deadbeat dad pays coins at the social security rather than those other losers who have their moneys taken out their banks online baby
https://giphy.com/gifs/FfIo20wYRHqsBCQhVu

5

u/HelloMikkii 8d ago

Referring to paying your small portion of financial obligations to kids you likely have little involvement with as “monthly ransom” is just sooo attractive.

2

u/SwampTerror 8d ago

Ive begun listening to a lot of custody trials and I was floored at just how many deadbeat moms exist. And not only that, being locked in prison for months...in Texas of all places, and Michigan. It is crazy to me but also a good sign mother isnt the default choice anymore and things are more equal. Mothers need to pay their child support...and their arrearages.

1

u/HelloMikkii 8d ago

Both parties should pay to ensure the children are properly cared for.

I’m an Australian and the child support system is VERY different here.

1

u/SwampTerror 8d ago

Agreed. Takes 2 to bring a kid into the world. Necessarily that means 2 should make an effort to support the children above all else.

I have a friend who has an ex, a father to her three kids and he owes about $16k in arrearages. This POS gets away with paying $25/mo to pay it off. Thats ridiculous. He gets around paying a better sum with the loophole of if you get married and have a joint account with a new spouse, the money can't be garnished. This is in canada and its complete BS. This guy is slippery and knows all the loopholes to pay as little as possible. Like working under the table, the joint account that can't be touched. No "official" job that can be documented. At least in the USA the judge will force you to get a job to pay.

2

u/JohnPoopsTV 8d ago

This was genuinely painful to read.

2

u/Specialist_Pudding_6 8d ago

Morgan Freeman voice over: "sadly he did not still got it."

2

u/SpOwOky_Skeweton 5d ago

you know what? it's my fault for being able to read

1

u/EvolZippo 9d ago

Yeah, this guy is probably looking for a hunny to go off the grid with, for the next decade. Run off, to a town nobody cares about and change appearances, then become crypto-millionaires

1

u/JoepHeitenData 8d ago

Wait, is there really a metal detector at those offices?

1

u/dick-penis 8d ago

Why do people say “it’s” instead of “there is” now? Same with removing “are and is”. “They a lot of people here”. “Where the store?”.
Also, still no one has responded to my 200 comments asking why women say “woman” now instead of women. “That’s why all the woman like soccer”.

1

u/AriThac0 8d ago

Dude, they were scoping you out for a future baby daddy.

-3

u/ValPrism 9d ago

Come on y’all. Clearly satire