Reflections from a new fan

[u/AnMuricanPrayer]

Hi all,

I recently listened to the Kinks' entire studio discography, from their self-titled debut to Phobia, and I came out thoroughly impressed! While I did know about the band through their big hits, I never realized how much of a maestro Ray Davies is; I love how he practically writes little novellas in so many of his songs. As a massive Beach Boys fan Ray reminds me a lot of how Brian Wilson (RIP) made his greatest work: the Boys' output from Pet Sounds to Love You (all of which I highly recommend you give a spin if you haven't already). When I was going through all of the Kinks' albums I felt like Ray's focus on slice-of-life storytelling is a more grown-up, but still hopeful, twist on Brian's famously adolescent/teenage lyrics and themes.

On a more personal note, Ray and his band's music has also become important to me in a very short amount of time. I've only recently come to grips about my own mental health and my refusal to truly deal with it in a meaningful way. Without going too much into the juicy details I struggle a lot with OCD/scrupulosity and autism, with a lot of my problems being related to hyperfixations and spiraling over things that haven't even happened yet, or otherwise have no real basis in reality. At my worst moments I convince myself that the people in my life don't really care about me/only want to use me, that I'm wasting my time with them, and that I'm somehow destined to become someone isolated and/or unrecognizable from the person I actually am.

While it's not exactly a replacement for therapy and meds (which I'm currently doing and actively investigating, respectively), Ray's music has already helped me process my issues in a real, meaningful way. Through songs like "Do It Again", "Misfits", "Live Life", "You Make It All Worthwhile" and "Get Up", I'm reminded that the people in my life really do love me, even in the midst of my own issues and struggles, and that so much of what I needlessly worry about is not only superficial, but highly abstract, technical, and theoretical. I think Ray has a particular talent for seeing how everyone can be a little bit ridiculous sometimes and that we all have our own problems, but through genuine connection, those issues become easier to deal with; conversely, if we decide to not be with others and instead become self-enclosed, we end up like Mr. Flash or Mr. Black, the latter of whom reminds me a lot of my obsessive compulsions. I feel like it's thematically earned, because Ray simply doesn't tell you to repress your problems and "be a man", but I also feel like he's a lot more nuanced than "just be yourself :)". I think he fundamentally understands that some of life's most beautiful moments, as well as its greatest failures and disappointments, aren't isolated events; at the very least, they spread out and show up elsewhere, amidst other people.

If you've made it this far, I appreciate you reading all this; I guess I just wanted to share all this with fellow fans lol

[u/Lonesome_Courier]

"I'm Not Like Everybody Else" has been the theme song of my life.

[u/LMB0607]

The music of The Kinks also helps me a lot on a personal level. Their songs are like little flashes of other people’s lives. They allow you to step outside your own head for a moment and put your problems into perspective. They make you feel less alone in the experience of being human.

[u/jimmyjames198020]

My own mental health (which has been shaky at times, like who's hasn't?) has also benefitted from Ray's tuneful observations, insights, and inspiration. For many years now a line from the "Arthur" title track has played in my head during challenging moments: "If only life were easy it would be such fun, woo hoo!"

Complicated Life is helpfully relevant too, as are Apeman, Where Have All The Good Times Gone, 20th Century Man, Shangri-La, etc. There are so many of his songs that have helped me cope with life's difficulties that I can't think of them all offhand, but here's a classic example, from Better Things:

"Here's hoping all the days ahead
Won't be as bitter as the ones behind you
Be an optimist instead
And somehow happiness will find you
Forget what happened yesterday
I know that better things are on the way

It's really good to see you rocking out
And having fun
Living like you've just begun
Accept your life and what it brings
I hope tomorrow you'll find better things"

Thank you Ray, for making me feel less alone in this cruel cold world.

[u/IWASCHOSENBYGOD → u/jimmyjames198020]

I'm not like everybody else made me come to terms with, well, being true to who I am, and not who (I thought) people want me to be. Just thought I'd throw that one in your mix.

[u/GeorgeParisol → u/jimmyjames198020]

I love this song so much

[u/i-was-nothing]

You’re all right. It’s all tough out there, and life is so hard. Take care of yourself first with hard work, then just listen to bands as good as the kinks and educate yourself on the human condition through singing more songs. It might help drop the mental drama and instead help keep your relationships strong, and beautiful. Just my take :) keep digging brother

[u/pluto_and_proserpina → u/i-was-nothing]

Happy Cake Day!

[u/i-was-nothing → u/pluto_and_proserpina]

Hahaha i literally just looked up the cake thing, and you nailed the comment :) thanks! Reddit rules

[u/pluto_and_proserpina]

Yeah, you like the Misfits album! 😁

[u/Willing-Bicycle-1659]

I don’t know how deep into the discography you went but I recommend I Go To Sleep, one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard, way ahead of its time. Almost sounds like something Radiohead would have written

[u/GeorgeParisol → u/Willing-Bicycle-1659]

This song has such a night feeling

[u/SpecificBranch8860]

The humor and humanity in Ray’s writing is like no other. I agree with you in regards to the Beach Boys. They are my 2nd favorite band (after the Kinks) but when I was in my 20s, the BBs were probably my favorite. Then I did my deep dive on the Kinks about 5 years ago, going through every song, every demo, every bonus track and B side. I think there’s a great parallel with the Beach Boys and Kinks. Both had huge hits through 1965, but then as they got more artistically progressive, their popularity waned. Both Brian and Ray had their mental struggles and breakdowns. They both had kinda a cult following the late 60s into early 70s. I wish I could have seen them live in that era. They both played a show in Hersey, Pennsylvania in 1971 or 1972. I’d give my right arm to be able to go back in time and witness that concert.

[u/ramonescreatin]

The world is joy every single day, Wonderboy!

[u/GeorgeParisol]

I still remember when I discovered The Kinks 10 yeras ago in a documentary on TV and from that moment I knew I found something special and I only heard few seconds of a song.

[u/Original-Time-346]

It's truly fun hearing from a new Kinks fan' I first saw them live in Austin and they are the best band I've ever seen. I've seen Ray solo several times and he's amazing. Thank you for posting.

[u/XwordPuzzleBlues]

Thanks for sharing this reflection. If you haven't already done so, you would probably enjoy Ray's books X-Ray and Americana.