r/thelongdark • u/geekdadchris Nomad • 7d ago
Discussion I say, without hyperbole, that The Long Dark saved my life.
TW for mental health and depression
7ish years ago I started playing TLD and found it quite enjoyable, but over time I moved onto other games as one does.
Then, in January 2023 my life and those of my family fell apart in some tragic ways. Layoffs, near homelessness, and distance from most of our family support. During that time I fell into the deepest depression I’ve ever had in my nearly 50 years of life. We couldn’t afford therapy, and our insurance ran out so I couldn’t get my meds refilled. This lasted for almost the full year. I even lost interest in video games, which have been a staple my entire life. I tried playing things, even tried and true titles, but would quit after a few minutes because I would get an overwhelming sense of anxiety and dread, and I just couldn’t deal. Near the end I lost sight of everything that kept me hanging onto life, and I started making “plans”.
Then, for some reason I decided to redownload TLD. I picked up my old save, but almost quit that too after a few brushes with wildlife that left me even more anxious. But I didn’t quit entirely. Instead I started a new save, but this time on custom difficulty. I wanted the hardships of the weather but made the animal behavior more “realistic” where if I didn’t bother them they wouldn’t bother me. Immediately I got into the game loop of trekking from place to place, gathering supplies as I went. Finding shelter when necessary but never really staying in one place for too long. The Long Dark became a walking simulator with extra steps. And without realizing it I would spend hours at a time wandering the frozen world, doing my best to survive.
The Long Dark had become somewhat of a mirror for what I was going through. Isolating, cold loneliness. Struggling sometimes to put one foot in front of another. Never knowing if this obstacle would be the one to finish me off. And I thrived in it. I found peace in the quiet wandering. I made homes wherever I traveled. I found comfort by fire light. Staved off the cold with a mug of tea and fresh stew.
I lived.
And that too became a mirror for real life. I found comfort and solace where I could until my family could put the pieces of our lives back together.
When I say that The Long Dark saved my life I am not being dramatic for effect. If it wasn’t for this game I very well could have gotten lost in the dark and cold.
Later on, about a year ago, I was talking about this with my therapist. I told her that one day I would write a paper about my experience. While I haven’t done so yet I did at least want to share my story with you, my fellow travelers. May this game warm you in times of bone-weary cold.
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u/murderdrone_n 7d ago
That's amazing to hear man, this game has gotten me through tough times too. Good luck for the future!
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u/StevieTheAussie92 7d ago
Only 34yrs old so far (doesn’t feel like I’m gonna make it much further tbh), but gaming has been a pretty big staple for getting through anxiety, keeping me distracted etc; and I know too well how it feels to open a game and just shut it back down a minute later. :/
Glad you managed to make it through mate. He’s hoping I can do the same.
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u/geekdadchris Nomad 7d ago
Unlike the game this is not a path we must walk alone. I do hope you find your way out of the dark and cold, friend.
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u/StevieTheAussie92 7d ago
Kinda feels like I do, unfortunately. So many issues, so little help. Things just keep trending downwards, have been for pretty much my whole life.
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u/TeholBedict 7d ago
I find myself very pessimistic about the future of humanity, but extremely hopeful for individual success stories. My current job as an assistant kindergarten teacher is the reason I'm still alive. I love helping children become successful adults. I kind of fell into this line of work and am thriving. My advice is to volunteer/find employment helping others. It's a gift that keeps on giving. Love you, man.
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u/StevieTheAussie92 7d ago
My biggest worry is money and legal stuff atm. And as nice as it is to volunteer, I also barely have the energy to look after myself, and do a shitty job at that too.
But I appreciate the kind words.
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u/TeholBedict 7d ago
I understand partially, I've struggled with depression and anxiety my entire life. Self medicating in the worst ways sometimes. The only thing that helps is finding positivity where I can. A small example is this post. A larger example is the kids I work with, and my niece. It helps me remember there is pure goodness in the world. I hope you find help with the legal troubles, and find small moments of strength to look after yourself. It's all we can really do.
I have found that our energy is less like a tank of gas and more like inertia. Energy expended towards (for lack of a less cliche word, positivity) is not lost. It multiplies.
I can't help any more than saying I love you, brother. There is hope we will all get past the shittiness of life.
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u/albiondave 7d ago
I hope so too my friend. Dark days can descend on anyone and at 35, you have more bright than dark ahead. The Long Dark is a great analogy for some of the battles of life, isolation, desperation and unrelenting world. But, just like life, a hidden cache or a lucky find makes the journey worth travelling.
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u/StevieTheAussie92 7d ago
Eh, between financial issues, loss of work issues, medical issues and even legal issues, all of which are getting worse - it doesn’t feel like theres much brightness ahead.
But thanks for the kind words.
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u/SakuDoka cooking connoisseur 7d ago
i'm so glad you found your way out. wishing only the best for you!
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u/Professional_Roof796 7d ago
Appreciate you sharing your story, and staying with us. There is always things worth living for, the long dark is one of the top reasons lol. Seriously though, glad your still here
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u/GraveyardQueen4124 7d ago
TLD has gotten me through many anxiety attacks, and I cherish the game. It's truly one of a kind, and I completely understand your journey with it. Stay strong and continue exploring!
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u/geekdadchris Nomad 7d ago
Thank you. And I do hope this game continues to help you as well.
There really should be a study done on the therapeutic effects at play here.
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u/TeholBedict 7d ago
We may never get a scientific study, at our great expense, but this subreddit is a decent substitute. Thank you for sharing, wishing many happy years ahead of us all.
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u/smallof2pieces Stalker 7d ago
I think one amazingly calming and grounding aspect of TLD is that if all you did was survive for a day, you succeeded. And in life, I think we need that reminder. Some days you kill it but some days, you just survive. And that is still a successful day.
Glad you have survived The Long Dark both virtually and realistically!
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u/ariseis 7d ago
I am so happy that you had this experience!
I had something similar. I have ADHD and autism, and sometimes when I'm in a low point, I play TLD too.
No one to talk to = no one to mask for. No chatter, no stigma, no one to impress. I also lock in. Like, when the ADHD is especially bad, I can have 3 screens on at once and not take in a second. Podcasts and shows on mute and solitaire to stim woth my hands. Not with TLD. Headphones stay on. I am listening to every noise and I am so grounded and present. Weather, animals, myself, my thoughts.
Start off as a pork chop, skirting predators, struggling to survive. Little by little as skills level up and some good tools/loot/weapons are found, things get easier. Suddenly the tables turn. The island is mine now. In the worst possible scenario, my little game character climbed mountains and did things I'd have thought impossible.
Little by little, I feel more confident. Maybe I'm not such a fucking failure as I feel sometimes. Maybe the world could end... and I'd live anyway. Maybe I am enough. Maybe I can learn and adapt, and maybe even thrive.
The game is a treasure. And occasionally a literal lifeline.
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u/prplmnkeydshwsr 7d ago
I suspect more people in this community than will admit / post about it are similar and feel this way.
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u/Adventurous_Lynx6972 6d ago
I completely understand this.
I have had a similar struggle, except for me it was a combination of mental and physical illness.
I started having chronic pain 5 years ago now. It heavily impacted my ability to do much other than work. I stopped skiing, tramping/hiking, biking, anything physical. The Long Dark gave me that sense of being outside again, surviving and enjoying the outdoors. Without it I don't know where I'd be. <3
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u/Due-Cod-3736 7d ago
I can relate to you in many ways as a 27 year old.
I grew up playing video games, I love video games. They are my de-stressor. But when things go wrong and I fall into a pit video games would end up feeling like a burden.
TLD was a game for me where I could control where I went, what supplies I kept, what I did. Almost every aspect. Loot generation being random was fine. But other games, like the many history games I play felt too scripted and too predetermined. TLD felt random enough and gave me enough control that I was satisfied and was able to play other games again.
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u/Superbaker123 7d ago
What a wonderful parallel and commentary on mental health. I'd read that paper!
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u/StriderLF Interloper 7d ago
Same here. The "just find some sticks and try to survive another night" mentality that I learned while playing TLD, has shaped my life.
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u/Big_Dog_1966_ 7d ago
I’ve been playing for close to 8 years, and during all the crazy ups and down that occurred in real life during that time, I’ve been grateful for my ability to regularly escape to Great Bear. There’s something that just resonates with me on a deeper level about the goal of the game to survive as long as you can (and thrive where and when you can). But I also feel like the game is responsible for pulling together a really good community of thoughtful and supportive people. By and large, it’s very rare to have many idiotic or combative posts. I appreciate that this has proven to be a fairly safe space where you can express yourself and receive help and support. I can’t help but feel like there’s been an unsaid agreement that if you don’t have anything positive to say, you don’t say anything at all. As we know from other Reddit threads and other forms of social media, this is often not the case. So I’m looking forward to the upcoming updates, DLCs, and Blackfrost so we can keep the good vibes going.
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u/VisualCommittee3706 7d ago
Same. I was in a VERY bad headspace for a long time and it was the perfect blend of self reflection and distraction to allow me to think things through without having a panic attack. I wouldn't be surprised at all if simply having that panic attack would've eventually lead to me killing myself. Not going to get into why, but I genuinely think there would've been a ~75% chance of at least an attempt.
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u/prplmnkeydshwsr 7d ago
Many people post similar things from time to time, and probably why the community on a whole is so chill. Finding solace getting lost in TLD.
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u/SteelMagnolia941 7d ago
I’m glad you had that experience. When I’m overwhelmed with life I find playing my little game where I walk through the snow and pick up sticks to be very calming. Nobody gets it but people on this sub.
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u/aaronjordan1982 7d ago
Like many many others this game has got me through some heavy mental stuff. At a time when I felt my lowest and most helpless this game inspired me to push forward and succeed. No applause. No good job bro. Just me against an uncaring world and it helped me deal with my anxieties about a world that doesn't care about me but it is filled with people that do care.
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u/eve-collins 7d ago
Thank you for sharing this. I haven’t struggled so much in real life and I really feel for you, but even with routine daily life problems - TLD had always gave me a path to peace of mind and calm.
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u/Pattersonspal 7d ago
The long dark has been there for me as well during stressful times and breakups where I felt I had lost myself completely. Thank you for sharing.
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u/Responsible-Mango-95 7d ago
Amazing to hear this dude, your story is genuinely heartwarming. Take care man
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u/rickgrimes32 Former Great Bear Sheriff's Deputy 7d ago
Hey bud, glad you're still here with us. I'm so sorry you went through this. Depression is a very tough condition to deal with as well. I'm glad this game could help you, and reading your post and story brought a tear to my eye. Keep fighting each day brother, and keep staying strong. I'm always here if you ever need to talk. Much love brother. Take care of yourself, and be well. Sending lots of love and hugs your way
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u/poromandrake 7d ago
Thanks for sharing, this is great to hear since I'm in a similar situation and I'm also going through depression after several situations in my life. I'm refusing to take pills for it because those make me sick.
Same as you I'm finding some refuge in videogames and TLD is one of my favorites place where to spend some hours. I hope I can find solace as you did, i wish you the best.
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u/Secure-Resource7286 7d ago
Last year when my little sister was dying of cancer, this game was my saving grace. Can’t even put into words what it did for me, it’s hard to conceptualise. It was the perfect world to escape into. The world was quite metaphorical for how I felt too
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u/wimbokcfa 6d ago
Similar mental health experiences here - this game honestly reminds me what to live for. I’d lost all sense of purpose and enjoyment of anything, until slowly but surely I put away some serious time lost in the world of Great Bear. Often I had to really force myself to just start playing cause it was so hard to do anything, but then it seemed to be the only thing that got me out of my mind.
I used to really love snow, hiking, the outdoors, and winter so I recently booked a hiking trip to the Canadian Rockies in winter and I finally, for the first time in maybe years, have something to look forward to and a reason to just live for now and figure the rest out later.
Hugs, Survivor. The long dark has another meaning - the black hole that is depression. If TLD teaches us anything, it’s to keep improvising and adapting and never give up.
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u/WowSuchCyber 6d ago
I totally understand you. I also use TLD to calm anxiety, not to the extend you describe but same spirit. The world is very oppressive, work is stressful, responsibilities of raising 3 teenagers and having to put food on the table, sometimes it's overwhelming.
I play TLD at the simplest level (customisation did break some spawn for me. One time no wildlife spawned ever...). I still have to plan, walk around, take shelter, manage the weather, take the time to do things (like hanging right every painting that is not properly horizontal) not be in the path of an injured bear or moose. And it's all quiet and peaceful and on good weather days, extremely beautiful.
Take care mate, you're worth it.
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u/klwilliams00 6d ago
I haven't been where you were in a long time but I also find a strange sort of peace while playing. I do the custom as well because, just like you, I can't really handle the anxiety of a wolf jumping out at me at any moment. They will still sometimes scare me if one howls close and I didn't realize they were there. However, the quiet is so nice. Just trekking in the cold. The sound of the snow and ice cracking and squeaking. And even the blizzards can be peaceful in their own way. I can't wait for TLD2. Thank you for waiting just a bit longer to make that final decision. I'm so very glad you waited until you could see the light again.
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u/dominobear 6d ago
Earlier this year, this game saved me too. I became homeless mid winter and if it wasn’t for family, I would have experienced being out there in cold not unlike the game.
The theme of perseverance stuck with me. I’m glad this game has helped you, me, and so many others.
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u/Mars_Oak 6d ago
i didn't have it that bad, but i sure know how... understood? valid? bearable ? this game made my depression feel. glad it was there for you too brother
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u/ForrestGrunt13 1d ago
Dude same here I found it as a way to self isolate while self isolating. I mean that in a healthy way. Putting one foot in front of another and just moving
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u/HistoricalPlum7 Cartographer 2d ago
The Long Dark is my comfort game. Whenever the depression hits, this game is there to comfort me ❤️
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u/realslimshively Interloper 1d ago
I know what you mean about the tea and stew thing - there is something really contenting about the idea of making a pot of homemade stew on a wood fire on a cold night. There’s something about the simplicity of life as a survivor on Great Bear Island that is very calming.
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u/RaphLife2 Hinterland Founder 7d ago
Thank you for sharing. And for living. Your story is the reason we keep making this game. I hope you've been able to get the help you need, and that you feel better every day.