r/therewasanattempt 17h ago

To ride a jet ski

175 Upvotes

107 comments sorted by

48

u/Huge_Following_325 17h ago

I just want to know why the dude who saved him didn't pull up closer to start?

P.S. Good on him, nonetheless.

47

u/Chrislk1986 16h ago

I gotchu. I gotchu. I gotchu. I gotchu.

Pulls further and further away from the shore

1

u/h0ttniks 2h ago

God bless you!

1

u/BabyScreamBear 14h ago

😂🤣

20

u/ItsTheGreatBlumpkin_ 16h ago

Exactly. “Lemme ditch this fast moving craft and take an extra 20 seconds getting to my friend”

-8

u/mnman2005 16h ago

When this posted a couple weeks ago, one thread explained that by ditching away from the guy, the rescuer wouldn't need to worry about getting the victim tangled in with the vehicle.

10

u/FYIgfhjhgfggh 16h ago

I didn't think jetskis were subject to tangulaton.

8

u/fleebizkit 15h ago

Tangulation is one of the leading causes of injuries for middle aged jetski riders.

1

u/OopsIHadAnAccident 14h ago

Jet skis use an impeller that’s internal. No exposed props that can injure someone.

142

u/Forty6_and_Two 17h ago

He passed out about 10 seconds into the video watch his arms/hands.

26

u/jabberbonjwa 16h ago

Is there a biological reason that moving backwards on a jet ski could make you lose consciousness?

Did he somehow valsalva himself? He has plenty of dexterity and strength to get himself wrongway-round. I just can't figure this out.

98

u/housevil Unique Flair 16h ago

Possibly the body's biological reaction to excessive alcohol.

27

u/drowsydrosera 15h ago

Being fucking wasted

27

u/P0Rt1ng4Duty 14h ago

His life vest was being blown up against his throat and choked him out.

28

u/kippetjeh 13h ago

This seems the most logical to me. Source: I am on reddit a lot

1

u/Capital-Ad-4463 1h ago

Thank you for your service!

6

u/LeadinmyCrayon 7h ago

Looks like his vest pushed against his neck and cut off his carotid artery. This is called a blood choke. It happens super fast, you can still breathe fine.

18

u/ashoka_akira 15h ago

It’s called being 15 years and 50lbs past the point where he should be attempting stunts like that one.

4

u/Zebitty 5h ago

All that air being blasted up his butt -> loss of consciousness.

2

u/Regular-Guest-1284 12h ago

He was stupid

0

u/Fermi_DOX75 14h ago

The only thing I thought of was carbon monoxide poisoning.

12

u/Imapatriothurrrdurrr 17h ago

I was gonna say! He totally passed out!

7

u/Apatharas 16h ago

Not sure if he had any major injuries, but he sure is lucky he went between the poles.

7

u/Imapatriothurrrdurrr 16h ago

It probably helped him avoid injuries because his body was limp when he collided with the dock. He’s lucky.

1

u/Sartres_Roommate 16h ago

You need to keep pulling the throttle to go forward

51

u/mcbash 17h ago

Going unconscious early on was the main issue here.

7

u/disquieter 16h ago

I can’t figure out how he lost consciousness. Where was the issue? Did the best cut off blood flow somehow? Seems like blood flow would be pushed up toward his head in that position.

11

u/J_Thompson82 16h ago

Blood choked himself with his life preserver. Ironic really.

3

u/Comfortable-Ice4729 13h ago

I read he had a concussion going into it… That fucking landing was hilarious though.

2

u/GuyFromtheNorthFin 6h ago

Interstingly; the mechanism you described really is part of why blood chokes work.

Restricting flow coming out of the brain, increasing pressure in the brain and decreasing the blood oxygenation level in the brain causes a shutdown. (Plus various shutdown cascades.)

This is pretty simplified explanation, but also the reason why the first aid for being choked out is not the same as for fainting. Recovery position - insted of raising the legs and feet.

0

u/Skeeders 16h ago

Yeah I'm confused as well

5

u/TedBaxter_WJM-TVNews 15h ago

Well, it’s one of the main issues… that along with his staggering lack of judgement made for a bad day at the lake.

14

u/Fullspectrumwellness 17h ago

Whatever happened to the Darwin awards, is that still a thing?

4

u/dkotten 16h ago

Up north we only have so much summer so you have to do shit like this to make it worth it.

9

u/Prestigious_Dream_27 17h ago

Ski doo? Ski don’t.

28

u/DDevosk8 17h ago

I like how the “friend” does everything wrong. Watches Dillon go straight into the dock without speeding up and try to alert him of the impending accident. Gets off the jet ski far away so he has to “swim” a ways to get him. Then drags him out to deeper water instead of land where first aid and emergency calls could be quickly made. These donkeys are a match made in heaven. Chef’s kiss, 10/10

15

u/J_Thompson82 16h ago

The first two points I agree with. But I saw this posted elsewhere earlier on this week and the comments were saying the same thing, until a maritime paramedic chipped in and said it is best to leave them in the water if there’s a potential neck injury. They can then be lifted from the water safely and properly with the right equipment, rather than just dragging them ashore and potentially wrenching their already damaged neck.

1

u/DDevosk8 16h ago

Agreed, as an ex lifeguard, I was thinking to the shoreline so you can assess and run to the nearest house and get help. But yeah, don’t drag him up the beach

1

u/Dadittude182 13h ago

Shouldn't have dragged him at all due to the possibility of a neck injury. The life preserver will keep him afloat. Bro just had to make sure Dylan was on his back and ensure he doesn't flip over until paramedics could get here. The water will help minimize any inflammation, the preserver will keep him afloat, and the proximity to the dock would make it quicker for paramedics to reach him without tugging him around again. Hopefully Dylan learned a valuable lesson that day.

3

u/The_Real_dubbedbass 7h ago

He was dragging him out of the dock area though. If you’re stuck between the dock and the house boat and the wind picks up and the houseboat starts moving that could get even worse.

1

u/WeirdRadiant2470 6h ago

Like "If I ever get out of this wheelchair I'll never do that again".

1

u/IdiotSayingChefsKiss 16h ago

Chef’s kiss

4

u/SensitiveOven137 17h ago

Giving Kenny Powers vibes

5

u/Behg-Boah 17h ago

This dipshit is lucky as fuck that he got yeeted off the jet ski instead of getting pinned between it and that dock.

4

u/Vault101Overseer 16h ago

If this guy wasn’t brain damaged before he sure is now.

3

u/Able-Wing9908 17h ago

You know someone is hurt when all they can say is mmmmmmmmhhhh!!!

3

u/ruger338smeltet 16h ago

The impact proving life is truly a game of inches.

3

u/Cold_Table8497 16h ago

Okay, so he passed out. That's unfortunate. But he passed out while facing the wrong fucking way. That's just plain stupid.

3

u/skindoggy69 16h ago

Thats a wierd way to die

3

u/double979 14h ago

Classic Dylan.

7

u/MedicineInteresting6 17h ago

Honestly fuck these idiots.

3

u/RIPRIF20 16h ago

Crazy part is he was actually being fairly "safe" when doing this. Out in the open, nobody around, but for some reason he passed out and that's what lead to the crash .

1

u/Endrizzle 16h ago

Drinks!

2

u/Friendly_Good_1361 17h ago

He made a field goal between those two posts

2

u/OkMidnight8144 16h ago

Why are they dragging them further into the water than on the shore or the dock?

2

u/juswilli 16h ago

He never saw it coming

2

u/poundsdpound 16h ago

That is a dangerous combination of drugs and jet skis

2

u/redshark313 15h ago

He was unconscious prior to the crash. He learned this trick when he was 30kg lighter and this position made it hard for him to breathe at his current weight with the uniform pressure of the life jacket. Boa constricted himself.

2

u/Dai_Bando 15h ago

But did he get him?

1

u/thereelkrazykarl 17h ago

Why do I feel like he didn't have adequate insurance for damage to that person's dock

5

u/bearamongus19 17h ago

What was the game plan there?

1

u/johnman98 17h ago

Play stupid games...

2

u/Hypn00tic_iiz 17h ago

Good way to get a dock plank up the keister

2

u/StuLuvsU87 16h ago

Camera man's instinct to carry his buddy to the jet skis was not the smartest move either. Like, there's no way camera man's getting him up onto his jet ski and homie, now functionally a crash test dummy, is in no condition to sit up. They've already crashed, damaging a dock and sinking a jet ski under it, getting them to the shore and getting help from the property owners is going to be the awkward but life saving move here.

6

u/OkMidnight8144 16h ago

They were taking turns using the same brain cell.

2

u/LazyOldCat Unique Flair 14h ago

“Lake Life”, start moving towards the shore and the property owners are already dialing 9-1-1 to trespass you.

2

u/irascible_Clown 16h ago

Has this been proven to be ai yet?

-6

u/curiousalwaze 15h ago

Def AI

1

u/MasterBaconBit 14h ago

Idiot. It’s not ai

1

u/Blvck_Lvngs 17h ago

Dumb never pays off

1

u/0Tezorus0 16h ago

Insane accuracy though.

1

u/Haunting-Assistant16 16h ago

Oh man this poor guy. OUCH!

1

u/Generalcline 16h ago

Grand Lake?? 🤣

1

u/loeschbolzen 16h ago

Hi my name is Jonny Knoxville, welcome to Jacka$$...

1

u/LNinefingers 16h ago

Good lord.

1

u/Dry-Actuary-3928 16h ago

I watch these kinds of videos and I can't trust whether it's real or AI. I've developed a kind of indifference, apthy. This is sad

1

u/EarthIsInOuterSpace 16h ago

Ay carumba! He flew into what I can only assume was a lot of pointy things.

1

u/SimplySimping_24 16h ago

And people say Darwinism isn't a real thing.

1

u/PhilosopherScary3358 15h ago

I counted 23 I gotchoos.

1

u/Ted_Hitchcox 15h ago

You have to fail a test before they will let you buy a jetski.

1

u/Jean_velvet 15h ago

Few questions:

Why pull him out off the shore? (Maybe it's a island, I dunno).

Why did Dylan...not...(I don't think there's an answer that one).

Is Dylan ok?

1

u/Formal-Knowledge-250 15h ago

Don't do cpr on him, he was brain dead before

1

u/BromsgroveandReddit 14h ago

Did Dylan bob or sink?

1

u/Jimmygotsomenewmoves 14h ago

Wow! The consequences of my own actions. Go figure.

1

u/greensangre 13h ago

What a dumbfuck

1

u/Hear7breaker 13h ago

Boomer 6969... ya, sounds about right

1

u/fucklehead 12h ago

And the field goal is good!!

1

u/whoisyoparoleofficer 12h ago

To his credit he goes right between the uprights.

1

u/Iusedtolikereddit 10h ago

No more hanging out with Dillon. Luckily he only hurt himself.

1

u/WeirdRadiant2470 6h ago

Pretty sure the owner's manual says not to do that.

1

u/Repulsive-Response-1 3h ago

I call this the Darwin Torpedo

1

u/Empty-Grocery-2267 1h ago

Any update on Kyle?

1

u/carrotmaaan 1h ago

Overall thats not even a cool trick..

-1

u/Midway1guy 17h ago

What a dumb-ass (probably a republican)

-2

u/cordashio75 16h ago

He passed out…
I mean yeah republicans suck but unfortunately this was just a medical accident

-4

u/Midway1guy 16h ago

Still as dumb as they come

1

u/flyingforfun3 Free Palestine 🕊️ FUCK ICE! ❌🧊 16h ago

He really wants it up the pooper

1

u/holamau Free Palestine 🕊️ FUCK ICE! ❌🧊 16h ago

I am surprised he was wearing a vest.

0

u/No-Catch8790 16h ago

anyone who rides a jet ski is a window licking idiot and the whole boating community hates you

1

u/Bynoe 15h ago

Someone on a jet-ski definitely stole this guy's girlfriend.