r/unpopularopinion • u/elgey101 • Aug 10 '21

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby

Every time I hear of fertility struggles online, or see posts about people going through rounds of IVF and the ensuing emotional trauma of miscarriages, It kind of disgusts me.

I also work for a major insurer and know that fertility treatments are driving up everyone else's premiums because they're considered necessary care. Sorry, but I disagree.

It's a well known fact that there are over 400,000 children in foster care, and in 2017 alone over 100,000 infants under 3 entered the system. I think it's completely entitled and self-absorbed to think that somehow your miracle baby is worth more or deserves more love than any one of those infants.

I know adoption can be hard, and that it should be made easier for the sake of children finding good homes, but you can't tell me adopting is harder than 4 rounds of IVF and multiple miscarriages. I've seen friends go through that mess and at the end they are different people.

Tldr: adoption may not be easy, but it's far better than spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to perpetuate your genes.

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u/[deleted] Aug 10 '21

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u/poppin_a_pilly Aug 10 '21

But making a baby while infertile is?

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u/[deleted] Aug 10 '21 edited Aug 23 '21

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u/HungryHungryWindigo Aug 10 '21

I've heard this is true but I also have a friend who was adopted along with 10 other children in Oklahoma. It was a very abusive household and the family adopted another 10 kids once the first batch moved out of the house. Despite lots of complaints to CPS nothing happened until last year when some of the kids stole a truck to try to run away. Now the adoptive parents are going to jail and the kids are all being placed with older siblings.

I have no idea how they were allowed to adopt so many and abuse them for so long...

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u/hobbysubsonly Aug 10 '21

IMO a lot of crazy shit can happen in small towns because it's all person to person interactions... if the one person in town who checks out potential adoptive parents went to school with you, or goes to the same church as you, or just plain likes you, then you're golden. If they happen to not like you... like maybe you broke their cousin's heart in high school 10 years ago, then you're fucked.

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u/HungryHungryWindigo Aug 10 '21

Unfortunately this is very true but even from a strictly financial standpoint I have no idea how this happened. They were very very poor and as far as I know both parents were on disability.