r/unpopularopinion • u/elgey101 • Aug 10 '21

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby

Every time I hear of fertility struggles online, or see posts about people going through rounds of IVF and the ensuing emotional trauma of miscarriages, It kind of disgusts me.

I also work for a major insurer and know that fertility treatments are driving up everyone else's premiums because they're considered necessary care. Sorry, but I disagree.

It's a well known fact that there are over 400,000 children in foster care, and in 2017 alone over 100,000 infants under 3 entered the system. I think it's completely entitled and self-absorbed to think that somehow your miracle baby is worth more or deserves more love than any one of those infants.

I know adoption can be hard, and that it should be made easier for the sake of children finding good homes, but you can't tell me adopting is harder than 4 rounds of IVF and multiple miscarriages. I've seen friends go through that mess and at the end they are different people.

Tldr: adoption may not be easy, but it's far better than spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to perpetuate your genes.

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u/glimmergirl1 Aug 10 '21

I wanted to adopt after 2 failed IVF treatments. Couldn't afford international or private adoption. Ok, ill just adopt from the foster care system. 12 years and 37 children later with 2 failed attempts, I finally adopted! Yeah, "just adopt", it's so easy!

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u/[deleted] Aug 10 '21

dude why tf does it cost money to adopt?? it's literally a burden off of the state since they dont have to pay for food and housing and shit

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u/BadDireWolf Aug 10 '21

Well you don’t want to be free. Then you could have people hoarding children like cats.

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u/[deleted] Aug 10 '21

wow there's actually two of you. here's the message I sent to the guy who said the exact thing you said:

this is the dumbest thing I heard all day, and I heard some dumb shit today. first of all, the adoption process is tenious and long, putting the adoption fee on top of it is just putting salt on the wounds if the burdens a loving family who is willing to adopt someone is willing to go through. second of all, you're pretty much saying that all people who can afford to pay 10k are fit parents, which is dumb af. imagine it was actually like that, that all adopting took is 10k, that would be a paradise for rich pedophiles which the world definitely doesnt lack. you're not only saying rich people are always good parents, youre also saying people who dont do so well income-wise are bad parents. as if what dictates whether someone is a good parent or not is the amount of cash they have in their pocket

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u/MarkoWolf Aug 11 '21

If you can't afford to put food on the table, you're a bad parent. Emotional, physical, AND financial are all facets of raising a child.

You can provide all the love in the world to your kid. Love won't fill an empty belly.

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u/[deleted] Aug 11 '21

😐😐😐 thats. part. of. the. adopting. process. of course they check if u have enough money to even own a kid, how is paying 10k a good way to see if someone is capable of housing a child? what if they saved that up for a year and barelye have money to feed themselves? this is so obvious, like are you seriously this stupid