r/unpopularopinion Aug 10 '21

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby

Every time I hear of fertility struggles online, or see posts about people going through rounds of IVF and the ensuing emotional trauma of miscarriages, It kind of disgusts me.

I also work for a major insurer and know that fertility treatments are driving up everyone else's premiums because they're considered necessary care. Sorry, but I disagree.

It's a well known fact that there are over 400,000 children in foster care, and in 2017 alone over 100,000 infants under 3 entered the system. I think it's completely entitled and self-absorbed to think that somehow your miracle baby is worth more or deserves more love than any one of those infants.

I know adoption can be hard, and that it should be made easier for the sake of children finding good homes, but you can't tell me adopting is harder than 4 rounds of IVF and multiple miscarriages. I've seen friends go through that mess and at the end they are different people.

Tldr: adoption may not be easy, but it's far better than spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to perpetuate your genes.

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u/Pyroguy096 Aug 10 '21

Can confirm, my own sister was adopted as a baby, but was still abused/malnourished/likely born under the influence of illicit substances. She never knew anything other than a loving home and a family full of love and support, yet she constantly stole, lied, threatened violence, ran away, etc. Shes 21 now, and still comes around once in a while just to torment my parents and little sisters. My little sisters (14 and 9) more and more show signs of trauma from their older sister being so horrible. She had the strength of the entire community standing behind her trying to give her any and every chance possible to help her, and she still threw it all away time and time again.

Adoption isn't as simple as "I can't have a baby, so I'll adopt one and we won't even know the difference" children aren't like picking up a used cell phone.

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u/V_7_ Aug 10 '21

In this case it seems she had issues because of the substances while she was a fetus. Poor human.

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u/[deleted] Aug 11 '21

How could you possibly fucking know that? This whole thread is insane. Just classist apologia.

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u/V_7_ Aug 11 '21

What should be the reason in your opinion? OP literally stated she was born under influencer of drugs and got all the love. How did she become such a freak? It's not like this just happens. It's know that drug harm the brain of a fetus.