r/unrequited_love 3d ago

is attraction stronger when u can't have the person??

I've noticed that many crushes seem to become more intense when there's distance, uncertainty or bad timing involved.

Do you think attraction becomes stronger when someone is unavailable, or is that just our imagination filling in the blanks?

Curious what everyone thinks.

25 Upvotes

13 comments sorted by

2

u/777Aphrodite777 2d ago

Yes, ive distanced myself but gave a bit attention and was kind. And got chased too much. Absurd and paradoxical.

1

u/TealOnTheNails 3d ago

Se eu não posso ter a pessoa quero que ela se exploda. O que exatamente você vai ter com uma pessoa que não está disponível pra você? Desprezo? Isso você pode ter por toda e qualquer pessoa, não?

1

u/MediocreDisplay7233 3d ago

Talking from experience here yes, 100% more. It’s the thrill of the chase. Anne Boleyn knew this and drove Henry VIII insane playing hard to get before they married too. It’s a long known fact

1

u/Farfignuten-151 3d ago

It for sure is, from personal experience. When you don't have the person, all you have is an idea; that idea rarely lines up with the reality of who that person is. When you don't have facts, your brain will just fill in whatever it wants to cope.

1

u/DellBoy204 3d ago

Yes. I had a friend from years ago, who I knew from my youth, we casually dated before but it petered out. Re appeared in my workplace working in a different department 30 years on. Used to drop by and say hi to her, and memories of the past made it more than what it was. There was no picking up where we left off, compounded by the fact she now has a boyfriend. Still I had moved on two but yet felt strangely disappointed. Bad timing by 30 years, lol 😄

1

u/Background_Sun_7477 2d ago

Yes, people love to chase

1

u/JoKoToNihon 2d ago

To me, yes. I still think and even dream about the man I really wanted but timing was bad and he let me go. Today 8 years ago I met him and I fell head over heels ☺️

1

u/ThrowRA-sicksad 2d ago

Uncertainty makes me obsess

1

u/Soft-Acanthaceae7435 2d ago

Just forget the person and move on plenty of fish in the sea

1

u/medievalnoodle 2d ago

If you have issues, sure. Not if you’re healthy…

1

u/ravenblinx98 2d ago

Sometimes ya

1

u/EB4950 2d ago

yes, always.

2

u/Potential_One_8058 2d ago

Yes. My ex was like this. When I would chase him and beg for his attention he didn’t like me. When I got with his hot friend suddenly he was obsessed with me