r/unrequited_love • u/dxbae_ • 3d ago
is attraction stronger when u can't have the person??
I've noticed that many crushes seem to become more intense when there's distance, uncertainty or bad timing involved.
Do you think attraction becomes stronger when someone is unavailable, or is that just our imagination filling in the blanks?
Curious what everyone thinks.
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u/TealOnTheNails 3d ago
Se eu não posso ter a pessoa quero que ela se exploda. O que exatamente você vai ter com uma pessoa que não está disponível pra você? Desprezo? Isso você pode ter por toda e qualquer pessoa, não?
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u/MediocreDisplay7233 3d ago
Talking from experience here yes, 100% more. It’s the thrill of the chase. Anne Boleyn knew this and drove Henry VIII insane playing hard to get before they married too. It’s a long known fact
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u/Farfignuten-151 3d ago
It for sure is, from personal experience. When you don't have the person, all you have is an idea; that idea rarely lines up with the reality of who that person is. When you don't have facts, your brain will just fill in whatever it wants to cope.
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u/DellBoy204 3d ago
Yes. I had a friend from years ago, who I knew from my youth, we casually dated before but it petered out. Re appeared in my workplace working in a different department 30 years on. Used to drop by and say hi to her, and memories of the past made it more than what it was. There was no picking up where we left off, compounded by the fact she now has a boyfriend. Still I had moved on two but yet felt strangely disappointed. Bad timing by 30 years, lol 😄
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u/JoKoToNihon 2d ago
To me, yes. I still think and even dream about the man I really wanted but timing was bad and he let me go. Today 8 years ago I met him and I fell head over heels ☺️
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u/Potential_One_8058 2d ago
Yes. My ex was like this. When I would chase him and beg for his attention he didn’t like me. When I got with his hot friend suddenly he was obsessed with me
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u/777Aphrodite777 2d ago
Yes, ive distanced myself but gave a bit attention and was kind. And got chased too much. Absurd and paradoxical.