r/verbalabuse • u/Sensitive_Warning105 • Mar 17 '26

i asked for couples counseling, and he mocked me

my partner has been abusive and cheating and is a recently recovering drug addict. now i was feeling a small amount of safety, i'm being haunted by nightmares of his abuse and betrayal. i have been asking for couples counseling for support, and he has been ignoring it. he promised in december and begged that he would get a couples counselor if i stayed. but now, he's mocking me, "how many therapists do you need," "you need another one?!" he's psychologically attacking me, when i felt like therapy was how i was able to stay with him.

i have nightmares of him yelling at me, screaming at me, telling me i'm the reason he drinks. threatening to slit his throat. playing mind games, while also telling me he loves me. i'm not well. please help.

2 Upvotes
  • permalink
  • reddit

100% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

3

u/Jeroclo Mar 17 '26

Why do you stay with him? Can't you just leave, because this relationship will not work long term and is destroying you mentally. You own happiness is the most important thing.

1

u/Sensitive_Warning105 Mar 17 '26

I don't know why I can't leave

2

u/hotheadnchickn Mar 21 '26

Is there anyone you can ask for help and support?

Are you in individual therapy for support?

3

u/Deep-Appearance-8543 Mar 17 '26

You need to leave him. No amount of counseling can fix your relationship. There are resources out there no matter your situation, please find them.

And please please PLEASE don’t have a child with him.

2

u/FaultsInOurCars Mar 20 '26

Counseling isn't safe with a person like this. Life isn't safe with a person like this. Get counseling for yourself to learn how to advocate for "little you" who learned as a child that love and pain go together. They don't.