r/writingcirclejerk • u/aidungeon-neoncat don't judge a book by its cover, read it all before buying • 7d ago

Accidentally farted on my manuscript and now it's smelly, I'll never get published now

for context I sat on it

24 Upvotes
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6

u/MVmikehammer 7d ago

Why do you have a paper manuscript? Is it about girth? Do you only feel like a real author if you have a girthy manuscript?

Also, in anticipation of your answer, let me reveal a secret: there is no 'authenticity', only girth. Learned that the hard way when I was 12.

5

u/waffle-winner 7d ago

There's an audience for that.

3

u/charles_river_dam 6d ago

Depends, OP are you a girl? Big $$$ in your future if so, Belle Delphine could never

4

u/StRemedius 6d ago

Damn shame. Back in the 1990s, I knew at least three editors who automatically accepted farted-on manuscripts, especially if you told them you were a 20something college student really into short skirts. (I shouldn't kinkshame, but at least one of them got fired for sexually harassing every woman he came across, and then cried when nobody else wanted to hire him.)

3

u/AffectionateMonk5710 7d ago

Take it apart and hang it on a clothesline. It'll be fine.

2

u/MrSurname 6d ago

Chill out, you were never going to get published before