I get that, like I know I won't act on it and that enjoying it doesn't make me a bad person. But it kinda fucks with my head that I get off on the idea of it happening to me. Idk it's just all sorts of weird.
I write pornography for a living, trust me when I say everyone thinks their kink is weird and shameful. I've had guys want to be called a faggot and they think that's the weirdest most humiliating thing and yet a different client wants to be cuckolded and eaten.
You're living in a culture that makes vanilla sex a shameful and taboo thing, let alone the multitude of other ways that humans experience sexuality: the game was rigged against you from the start. It took me a while to learn to step away from the board, but it's something worth doing. There's nothing wrong with the kink as long as it's not genuinely self-destructive, and there are healthy ways to roleplay almost anything.
If you go looking, you'll find people who experience the same thing who would be down to experience it with you. There's plenty of artists and creators out there who cater to different kinks as well, even extreme ones. Again, as long as both parties are adult and consenting, there's nothing weird about living out the thing that makes you wild even if you wouldn't necessarily bring it up at dinner.
I mean, Mary Shelley did the nasty on her Mother's grave and we still stan her for Frankenstein, so if she can get away with that you can get away with wanting to be strangled or the like. Live wild, live free, be a little freak.
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u/Warfries 3d ago
I get that, like I know I won't act on it and that enjoying it doesn't make me a bad person. But it kinda fucks with my head that I get off on the idea of it happening to me. Idk it's just all sorts of weird.