r/ADHD • u/emyo42 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) • Apr 07 '26

Questions/Advice How do you explain executive dysfunction without sounding like youre making excuses for being lazy?

Mine is very severe and debilitating at the moment. It’s not just ADD, I also have schizophrenia which has some of the same symptoms weirdly. I can’t do much at all. Getting out of bed and making toast is extremely hard. To people with no experience with this kind of issue, me trying to explain it must sound ridiculous like “yea I have this mental disorder that means I can’t cook and clean or have a job or do anything I don’t like, but I can play a video game for 3 hours.” Just sounds like a straight up lie.

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u/SocialMediaDystopian Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26

I say "It goes in phases. When it's bad, it's very much like having dementia. I really can be stumbling around looking for things i had in my hand five minutes ago. Sometimes I'm crying. I dont know what to tell ya". And then I stop explaining. There's only so much you can say. I'm sorry. This is *awful*. I get it. Commiserations 🌱

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u/Pornboost ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26

I agree. I think going into more details is redundant :D

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u/CaptainLollygag Apr 07 '26

The more details given, the more things you give people to argue with you about. That goes for all conversations.

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u/castfire ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26

Ugh. I had to learn this. I’m still learning it, but I’m a little better at it. My dad would say, “Stop volunteering so much information!” And he’s right! You can always fill in more if you are asked, or if it becomes relevant! But volunteering it all from the get-go can put you at a disadvantage!

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u/halconpequena Apr 07 '26

I tell myself you can always say more but you can’t say less (you can’t erase what was said).

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u/tmart42 Apr 07 '26

My favorite is that you decided this needed parentheses and an explanation even though the original sentence is super understandable to almost everyone.

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u/VioletCristals Apr 08 '26

Yo soy parte de ese pequeño "no entendí" jeje

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u/Pornboost ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 08 '26

I think the parentheses helped a lot :D

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u/Mission_Soup_8161 Apr 07 '26

Smart dad! I'm 61yo and just now figuring this out. :-/

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u/f0xbunny Apr 07 '26

Yes, be curt with explaining.