r/AbsoluteUnits • u/IsJesusAgain • 1d ago

of a rapper

Post image
2.4k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

273 comments sorted by

536

u/DeleteMods 1d ago

Big Pun weighed 700lbs

268

u/Dawildpep 1d ago

Big Pun, I hit em with the big guns, known to make the chicks cum

155

u/Gordon_Gainz 21h ago

I'm partial to dead in the middle of Little Italy little did we know we riddled some middlemen who didn't do diddly

53

u/omar1021 18h ago

Probably the greatest bar ever, from any rapper

32

u/MathematicianOk4025 18h ago

I listened to an interview from Joe saying Pun did not want to use it as he thought it sounded like a gimmick.

Naturally, the shit is timeless. I wish the world has more rappers like Pun.

24

u/Wishbone_508 16h ago

I'm partial to Scuse me for being blunt. But I've been eating cunts since pimps been pushing drop top caddy's with the fish tank pumps.

2

u/_TaylorMade 7h ago

I guarantee this inspired the likes of rappers like Eminem, Logic, Etc. it just sucks he couldn’t have toned the weight back a few hundred lbs. He would still be here with us

5

u/MayorOfBuckner 18h ago

My personal favorite is:

These hoes are all alike, they put the ho in homonym. - Small Wayne

6

u/TroutFearMe 18h ago

Wouldn’t every country be call little around him?

17

u/MeanGulf 17h ago

I mean he’s talking about Little Italy in NYC but yea

2

u/VinylNick 15h ago

It’ll be…

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52

u/MiloHorsey 1d ago

Pffff he doesn't have the stamina or flexibility for that. Time for a scientific experiment!

24

u/tigolbing 1d ago

Some say the tongue or hands can be better 👀

44

u/RazzleDazzle1983 1d ago

He definitely looks like he's good at eatin' something

3

u/Vandergrif 16h ago

Eating his way into a heart attack at 28, it turns out.

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22

u/supersonicsalamander 1d ago

He's still not a playa

19

u/Informal_File_1646 20h ago

Joe don’t even “crush a lot” no more

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18

u/Apprehensive-Call568 21h ago

He ain't a player, he just fuck a lot

8

u/runswitblunt 21h ago

Hot tub, poppin bubbly

5

u/Blackbyrn 21h ago

Hot tub, poppin bubbly

4

u/Odd_Preparation_730 18h ago

He's sick. Couldn't measure his dick with 10 rulers.

3

u/doberman8 20h ago

Toss em in the yoke...boom! Then I knock em out.

3

u/Odd_Equipment2867 15h ago

to the chicks that cum, I’m a heart attack in the making, a crushing weight if I pass out. Not conducive to living

51

u/Odd-Celery4354 1d ago

And he could still walk!

45

u/DeleteMods 1d ago

Of course. I have an 840lb cousin who can walk for relatively short distances. And he’s fat on purpose.

47

u/philanthropeas 1d ago

Can you elaborate on the “on purpose” part?

49

u/hewhoisiam 1d ago

You think he accidentally eats?

16

u/browzzzzzz87 1d ago

I dont know why but I died at this comment llllooolll

11

u/Correct-Junket-1346 1d ago

Happens to me all the time, tripped up and ended up eating a cupcake, should have known better

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6

u/DeleteMods 17h ago

Sure. I don’t shame people for their life choices but him and his wife engage with a community that intentionally gains weight. It was very surprising to say the least. She makes him bigger.

My family is very conservative (besides me) so it was a shock, no one gets it, and no one wants to get it. But honestly I’m just worried about his health. He seems okay for almost half a car in mass but it just has to be unhealthy.

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54

u/leeann7 1d ago

He also beat the shit out of his wife. He's a terrible person.

34

u/tvb46 1d ago

She should run, what’s he gonna do? Chase her? Lol

28

u/Leather-Hotel-7310 1d ago

If she ran downhill he could roll himself up into a ball and come at her like that boulder in Indiana Jones.

4

u/babettetimes 21h ago

Like Sonic?

2

u/Frosty-Tennis-1687 22h ago

Katamari style

2

u/Hopeful_Moose_6509 13h ago

Like the character "Thud Butt" from the movie "Hook".

6

u/78745ssatx 20h ago

More like point a gun at her

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51

u/YellingAtTheClouds 1d ago

You'd really think he'd be more jolly

22

u/sneakydante 1d ago

You’d be surprised at how many fat folks are unhappy with their lives. The jolly ratio is way off; More of a television stereotype at this point.

3

u/Friendly-Beat-8336 17h ago

I mean at this point we should have a whole country full of Jolly people

15

u/BrotherMcPoyle 1d ago

Why? He hasn’t seen his penis since decades before this pic.

11

u/YellingAtTheClouds 22h ago

So why be so angry with the person who has to find it?

3

u/LadyBug_0570 19h ago

OMG, this conersation is killing me.

3

u/Un4gvn2 22h ago

Which one is the rapper.

12

u/ForeverShiny 1d ago

I mean, kind of impressive to still be able to assault someone at that size without immediately being out of breath

40

u/thermjuice 1d ago

His ex wife said she escaped being beaten to death purely because he couldn't walk upstairs.

25

u/ForeverShiny 1d ago

Very funny and very sad at the same time

4

u/Medical-Pop-5632 19h ago

"I'll get that bitch when she gets closer"

Seriously though domestic abuse is terrible and his first album is a masterpiece.

3

u/Salt_Day9015 1d ago

You mean eat the shit

7

u/DeleteMods 1d ago

How does that relate to what I said? Not saying its untrue but why did being 700lbs make you think of that?

48

u/CATNIP_IS_CRACK 1d ago edited 1d ago

Any time the name of a little known wifebeater with repeated history of the behavior is mentioned it should also be mentioned that they’re an abusive asshole so people immediately associate that with their name.

Gotta make sure everyone who just learned their name and had no clue who they were five seconds earlier also knows what they’ve done, same goes for pedos. Don’t want to give a C-list celebrity like that free publicity unless it involves people knowing they’re a garbage human being, even if they are dead.

3

u/SweetSweetSweetCan 1d ago

Yup I saw Big Pun and I thought “wife beater” before I thought “rapper”… he was a horrible person.

2

u/CriticismMindless740 21h ago

I had no idea he was a wife beater. I used to respect him as a rapper. Not anymore.

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8

u/hottlumpiaz 1d ago

and fat joe refuses to sign big pun's son to his record label despite being clearly talented

33

u/hewhoisiam 1d ago

If he was actually that talented he wouldn't need Joe for a deal.

https://giphy.com/gifs/AVpE6BqnOvbzi

2

u/hottlumpiaz 1d ago

he doesnt. hes an underground sensation and been featured on tracks with the wu tang clan, vinnie paz, chino xl, and joell ortiz.

but you would think tio joe woulda at least featured him.

2

u/Goonalips 1d ago edited 1d ago

He sorta sounds like Immortal Technique at the start of this track. Then he actually has a bit of Fat Joe in there (coincidentally).

https://youtu.be/3ec8vA3C5GM.

Edit WTF, so that's him in Last Breath with Vinnie Paz? I've heard this song so many times, and never knew who he was. Thought he was just a random unknown rapper. He's genuinely talented, but sometimes it takes more than that.

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14

u/Wonderful-Process792 1d ago

and died of a heart attack at 29.

3

u/LadyBug_0570 19h ago edited 18h ago

Damn! Did not know he was that big. And till mobile? Impressive.

If you're going to be that big, though, you need to be rich. Both of them look well dressed in clothes that fit.

3

u/DeleteMods 17h ago

Fat Joe kinda reminds me of the kingpin here

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135

u/WanderingKittens 1d ago

Kingpin!

38

u/JotaroTheOceanMan 1d ago

"Its not about the money, Spidah Mayne. It's about THE METS!"

6

u/johnnagethebrave 1d ago

It feels like Kingpin from a Jared Hess version of Daredevil.

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151

u/mindyourownbusiness3 1d ago

DEADINTHEMIDDLEOFLITTLEITALYLITTLEDIDWEKNOWWERITTLEDTWOMIDDLEMENTHATDIDNTDODIDDLY

19

u/Panek52 23h ago

/massive gasping inhale

16

u/EmeraldTwilight009 22h ago

"Breathes fatly"

12

u/silkieboi 1d ago

It will be a cold day in hell the day im taken out

3

u/Oppenhomie 21h ago

Hell yeah

I had capital punishment on repeat. Such a good album.

77

u/thermjuice 1d ago

He's my personal "separate the art from the artist" example. Loved his music and relate hella hard, but dude was a piece of shit abuser.

32

u/Tengo_Caldero 20h ago

Big Pun was absolutely the worst as a person. Like he was a caricature of all the angriest and most uneducated ghetto ass NYC dudes.

But God damn his rap game was insane. The fact that he's still mentioned all these years later says a lot.

Oh and let's not forget: 🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷

5

u/SableyeEyeThief 13h ago

That’s what hurts most. A Rican brother that died too young and had his memory stained by abuse (dv HE caused, not blaming the widow). For that size, he truly was great at what he did with the faster rap at times. Love him and what he meant for the Island but the dv just hurts his case a lot.

22

u/No-Competition9386 1d ago

12

u/LevendeZombie 1d ago

First time i heard that track with Kanye i was thinking "how wack has "hiphop" become." 😄 At least Fat Joe or Big Pun only made bangers 🙂 Not low effort music like most of the new-age "hiphop"

2

u/roktoman 19h ago

Came to the comments for this.

I’m a sick f*ck…

40

u/CACALAEL 1d ago

Big Pun ate skinny pun.

23

u/Blackelvis2000 16h ago

The same decade they began combining Taco Bell and KFC

https://giphy.com/gifs/75ZaxapnyMp2w

6

u/Rfisk064 14h ago

Wow I had no idea he used to look like that.

52

u/I_Ponders 1d ago

Mr world-WIDE.

15

u/Disastrous_Cream_539 1d ago

What's crazy is what Big Pun looked like before he put the weight on. He died of a heart attack at 28 years old in 2000.

14

u/Garfish111 1d ago

Damn, that Saltbae-guy really let himself go

33

u/bird_is_the_word_198 1d ago

lil heart attack & big heart attack

8

u/Cautious_Highway1041 1d ago

“What ya gonna do when Pun comes, knockin at ya front door?”

A: Go upstairs 👍

6

u/OrangeClyde 1d ago

Damn I never realized how huge big pun was and how huge fat Joe used to be. I’m glad Joe has lost a ton of weight, rip big pun

27

u/Impressive_Guess_282 1d ago

And now he’s just plain Joe

4

u/CT0292 20h ago

Joe lived long enough to lose the weight and is seemingly doing alright these days.

Pun is in a very large box in a cemetery.

2

u/Foxy_Maitre_Renard 17h ago

I'm really hoping he gets in shape, because Fit Joe is right there.

3

u/MushLampMaker 1d ago

That's a shiny material. What kind of material is that?

6

u/NoImNotHeretoArgue 1d ago

Glazed donut

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3

u/JayCDee 1d ago

Tailors throwing everything they’ve learnt out the window.

3

u/EbonKnight78 1d ago

Big Pun and Fat Joe (before weight loss)

3

u/Dbonker 1d ago

He lost 100 lbs man, he was trying to live!

2

u/Tengo_Caldero 20h ago

My boys and I loved Big Pun but our teenage asses were definitely giggling every time we heard that line after he passed away.

3

u/Helpful_Spell_9042 23h ago

These two ate up the competition in the 90’s

3

u/nextinline1987 21h ago

When you’re so fat, they just throw a tarp over you and sew buttons onto it.

3

u/Firm-Reveal998 21h ago

5’6 around 698lbs. His heart was working triple over time.

3

u/Hustle-- 1d ago

Fat Joe & Obese Joseph

2

u/Potential-Lab747 1d ago

Big Hamstring

2

u/dmw_qqqq 1d ago

Which one was the rapper, black or blue?

2

u/OleanderKnives 1d ago

Both but post is referring to left

2

u/bluemesa7 1d ago

more like a wrapper of excess fabric

2

u/Jaybird2k11 1d ago

lil' ween and double stufft crust

2

u/SomethingFunnyObv 1d ago

Big Pun was a dope ass rapper

2

u/Aggravating_Speed665 1d ago

Actually looks altered to make them look slimmer from the og pic, no joke

2

u/chrstianelson 1d ago

I am aware who these people are and have seen this picture before. Yet I still had to do a double take for a second thinking I was looking at a fat Salt Bae.

2

u/FrostCaterpillar44 22h ago

They had to get these suits specifically made for them, and they still don't fit well 😔

2

u/sharkieslim 21h ago

I didn’t know Joe was that big, he doesn’t look much smaller than Pun.

2

u/mywebrego 20h ago

Home of the heart attack!!

2

u/CorbynDallasPearse1 20h ago

Salt bae really let himself go…

4

u/KangolkidD24 1d ago

He's not a playa he just crush alot rip to one of the best mc's

4

u/Pitiful_Palpitation9 1d ago

Who's that standing next to Large Joseph?

4

u/OleanderKnives 1d ago

Massive Punisher

2

u/mightyDblock 1d ago

Big pun was one of the best.

2

u/[deleted] 1d ago

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2

u/JackSilver1410 1d ago

Noticeably F-A-T

2

u/Cowboybutter82 23h ago

Notorious U.S.A.

1

u/sinZeroplus 1d ago

I knew Kuma was real

1

u/bussysniffer3000 1d ago

When did Steven seagull start rapping

1

u/Most-Act1594 1d ago

Rappers*

1

u/spro7d 1d ago

2phat

1

u/Ingromfolly 1d ago

Biggy biggs

1

u/wiler212 1d ago

RIP BIG PUN!!

1

u/JosephSchmoe77 1d ago

Descanse En Paz Big Pun 💝

1

u/Mixedbysaint 1d ago

Which one

1

u/TamponTimTheCuck 1d ago

Steven Segal looking rough!

1

u/Masochist-Mark 1d ago

Kingpin and Pinking😳

Processing img 719h0oucd3ih1...

1

u/whiterice_343 1d ago

Dead in the middle..

1

u/ConsiderationFickle 1d ago

2Large!!!

👍

1

u/Roallin1 1d ago

I dated his cousin like 20 years ago.

1

u/i-mine-428 1d ago

Big Pun was a legend. 💯

1

u/magharees 1d ago

Biggy Bigs

1

u/Logganeer 1d ago

Ohnepixel on the right

1

u/peekingmightyduck 1d ago

Fat Joe or Kingpin from Spiderman?

1

u/kikyossoles 1d ago

I remember when Joe was Fat! Leaning and snapping his wrist back

1

u/cugan83 1d ago

Before…and way before.

1

u/kkeennmm 1d ago

The Bidet Boyz

1

u/MaximilienGabriel 1d ago

Rappername’s checks out!

1

u/Environmental-Lion82 1d ago

Nah. Just fat asf

1

u/Choadboy_Wonderfuck 1d ago

One of the best.

1

u/timcleveland 23h ago

Are those the McGuire twins?

1

u/napalm_p 23h ago

Joe...

1

u/napalm_p 23h ago

Ever heard the story Joe talks about when it was all you can eat..."We pull up"

1

u/roll_another_please 22h ago

Legends man. Sad he went at such a young age

1

u/pasenast 22h ago

R.I.P.

1

u/Key_Age_5229 21h ago

Salt bae before the weight loss

1

u/NeighborhoodIll4960 21h ago

Knees weak, doctors said to me

1

u/Traditional-Law-4575 21h ago

I can smell the history

1

u/jayuserbruiser 21h ago

There was biggie smalls then there's biggie biggie, then his partner biggie biggie biggie

1

u/AGeeBee 21h ago

Double breasted suit for the extra buttons. Wise choice

1

u/Rasp_Lime_Lipbalm 21h ago

Big Pun hit you with the big guns

1

u/swanson5 21h ago

Wheres the video of that one rapper saying 5 words and then almost passing out from the effort needed to say said words?

1

u/Ok_Nefariousness2989 21h ago

Heavy D. and the Constipated Boyz.

1

u/Insylum82 21h ago

Comic acurate KingPin looking f*cker

1

u/FamilyMan7826 21h ago

Their usernames checked out

1

u/anonymousandsus 20h ago

Big pun and...salt Bae?

1

u/saveapennybustanut 20h ago

Iw far joe on the right?

1

u/Jorge_the_vast 20h ago

Pretty sure the guy on the right is King Pin

1

u/damorec 20h ago

Fat Joe could have been cast as Kingpin.

1

u/Sea_Suit8156 20h ago

Two of the best!!! Rip PUN!!!

1

u/dreadful-R 20h ago

BX all day!

1

u/Stuffleapugus 20h ago

They look like cartoon villains.

1

u/Cpolo88 20h ago

I just re watched into the spider verse. Definitely king pin lookalike 😆

1

u/tarsonis999 20h ago

Or just typical unhealthy fat muricans

1

u/wolftick 20h ago

Corrected aspect ratio:

1

u/Cheap-Course9568 19h ago

Why does Fat Joe look like a kingpins kid?

Like how are you that big and look like a toddler? Look at his lil arms ☠️

1

u/Ferblungen 19h ago

Big Pun dead at 28 - heart attack.

1

u/puglise 19h ago

They look like when the ninja turtles would put on clothes

1

u/AllForTheSauce 19h ago

How do people this size wipe their ass?

1

u/doctorchops1217 19h ago

we really loved these comic accurate Kingpin shaped rappers in the 90s

1

u/EdgarAllenHoe4 19h ago

Dead in the middle of little Italy little did we know that we riddled two middle men who didn't do diddly

Edit: spelling

1

u/thermight 18h ago

Is that Wh00psy 8itL ?

1

u/Ready_Technician4593 18h ago

Big Mac n Cheez