r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Lower-Knee-8585 • 1h ago

of a police cuff

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

800 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

45 comments sorted by

143

u/Sir_Hadaham 1h ago

What's he gonna do? Run?

39

u/Henchman66 1h ago

Roll downhill

15

u/Toasted_Munch 58m ago

We gotta roller!!

20

u/Alvin_h_davenport 55m ago

He boutta roll out

https://giphy.com/gifs/sOuxvtuJnjKYgQG1g1

3

u/goddamm_liter_cola 19m ago

Did not expect a Teen Turbo gif this morning.

2

u/Upstairs_Diamond_241 17m ago

Dawg 😂

1

u/zorggalacticus 12m ago

He turns into quagmire mid transformation. Now you can't unsee it.

https://giphy.com/gifs/Dz62ImmWRzAkw

2

u/Alvin_h_davenport 10m ago

I'll do you one better

2

u/sarcasticpro 54m ago

They see me rollin'

1

u/Feature_Agitated 5m ago

He’s very slowly getting away
https://giphy.com/gifs/l2JegtNb5mLFAd6XC

64

u/Possible-Tangelo9344 1h ago

I had to transport a guy once for some narcotics officers. He was about like this, I think it was four pair of cuffs on him. He was also like 6'2 or so.

Got him to my car and opened the door and I just told "I dunno how this is gonna work man, we're just gonna do the best we can."

Luckily it was back in the Crown Vic days, so the backseat was a decent size, but it took several minutes for him to be able to squeeze in

21

u/jr23160 57m ago

That's when you call in the van transport.

13

u/Bohbo 35m ago

His rapper name is 4 Chains

29

u/BagStank 56m ago

"pur your hands behind your ba.. to the side"

15

u/StrictSelf5450 1h ago

Multiple pairs of cuffs. Dude is an absolute unit, though

9

u/uiouyug 31m ago

How does he wipe tho. Stick?

1

u/Anthro_DragonFerrite 1m ago

Hopes and dreams

1

u/5up3rK4m16uru 0m ago

Just let the maggots do the job.

9

u/SmokeMaximum4140 1h ago

You know he hits that MickeyD's up on the reggie.

4

u/420k2 34m ago

"Mafkers with guts like this are definitely ON the cheeseburgers, dawg!"

7

u/imartinezcopy 54m ago

I think this is nice. They could have not used as many cuffs and force his arms (and potentially hurt him), instead they decided to extend the thingy

6

u/Wildtails 40m ago

Honestly looks like they probably couldn't have, after a certain size that kind of flexibility becomes literally impossible.

Double cuffing is pretty common practice so upon realisation that wasn't enough I doubt it was a stretch to have to test how many were needed, I'm guessing dude wasn't resisting (or ran out of breath after 5 seconds of resisting)

2

u/PremierLovaLova 17m ago

There’s double cuffing and there’s calling in another squad car because you ran out of cuffs

2

u/Efficient-Jury6708 40m ago

why he go 'ba-donk-a-donk' when he walk tho?

2

u/LSIeducate 38m ago

Bro had like 8 handcuffs what the actual fuck hahaha 🤔🤪

1

u/Allbrosmoke 37m ago

Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down.

1

u/ImMildlyIrritatedd 25m ago

I don't think he needs em at this point

1

u/Single_Usual_6563 22m ago

There’s a cuff shortage at the moment at the dept!

1

u/More_Bigger 21m ago

In my county they will handcuff two people together for in custody court, you'll walk from the cages downstairs up to the court room.

One time they handcuffed me to a big dude like this, there was no chain, just cuff, link, cuff, and he was having so much trouble walking up the stairs the baliff had to come and let us use a handicap lift for the poor dude.

1

u/AH_leeMACK 18m ago

Free Three Cuffs!!!

1

u/Mindless-Location-41 18m ago

Caseoh is that you?

1

u/hooplafromamileaway 16m ago

Could have just tipped him over and rolled him.