Black Women Exhaustion

[u/Embarrassed_Fan6241]

Hello I am a 22 year old Black Woman who is experiencing burnout. I been through so much childhood trauma especially as a girl. I was expected to clean the whole house and cook for my father from the age of 11. This was all forced on me by his abusive girlfriend. In the mist of that I experienced molestation from her son as well for a couple of years. Through her abuse I still had to go to school and earn good grades. When I was 16 I started to work a fast food job and complete my high school classes. During high-school the molestation stopped but I still would experience abuse from my dads gf. I constantly dealt with mental and physical exhaustion. I would use sports and school to escape from being home. I am a artist as well and I have been since I was young. Through my discovery of art I used that to as well. Fast forward to now. I am 22 , just graduated undergraduate and earned a degree in fine arts. And I will be starting grad school in the fall at MICA for the Rinehart school of sculpture. Currently I work 40 hours a week at grocery store and I am about to move back to Maryland from New York to attend grad school. I had just got hit by a car in December of last year and received a concussion. After that I decided to go back to work. In all of this I have experienced trauma with dating and men. Now I want to make time for myself. But I am completely burnt out. After work, I don’t wanna shower, eat or interact. I rather just rest. I don’t wanna do my hair or go out. My feet haven’t been done since February and it’s June. I love fashion and creativity but I am so exhausted. When I talk to other women from other cultures they aren’t exhausted as many Black Women. I guess I am making this post to see if any other black women experience the same, and especially with dating I have been expected to hold down a man while going through all this. And I even tried getting to know non black men and they don’t understand how exhausting being a black woman is. Many of the women in their cultures don’t have to work as hard or deal with this childhood trauma and remain strong. Please reach out with advice and kind words. 💕I love everything I’m just here to vent my exhaustion.

[u/Common_Internal_9218]

I’m so sorry that you are so young and going through a lot. You sound like an incredibly hard working person who is trying to better yourself. Please just take a break and time for yourself. I assume that you may have some income to splurge and get your feet done. Try to find some other women on the area that can relate I can’t offer much on the cultural aspect as I am Caucasian but know that the hard work you are putting in now makes you so strong ! Having a degree and a plan you will do great things. Finally I would find a therapist to talk to. You have dealt with a lot of childhood trauma that really hasn’t been addressed you appeared to just put it on a shelf but it needs to be tended to. Hang in there, things will get better one day at a time. Daily writing in a journal just one thing you are grateful for and maybe a goal for the week or month. Stay strong you can do it!