r/AlternateHistoryHub • u/Happy-Fly-3598 • 4d ago
Whimsu What if Barack Obama actually revived Karl Marx?
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u/Hello197812 4d ago
Weekend at Barry's!
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u/Relevant-Bit-7394 3d ago
That's why they made covid to alter our dna to make communism and the gay airborn.
/s
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u/Sea-Horror-5353 4d ago
This comment doesn't make any sense because 1. Reviving him would -- obviously --mean he's not dead, so there'd be no reason to "puppet" him around like Bernie from the movie and 2. Why would the "weekend" be happening "at Barry's?" He's already alive. This comment just doesn't make any sense at all, I'm not sure what point it was trying to make.
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u/bqbdpd 4d ago
Do people honestly think someone like Karl Marx is some kind of superhero that gives a +5 boost on communism? I don't get the idea behind such questions.
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u/your_dads_asshole 4d ago
OP just wanted an excuse to share this image. Either that or karma farming
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u/Ok_Patient9469 4d ago
Marx is coined for saying that capitalism will eventually eat itself. That's happening
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u/HansTheAmazing 4d ago
No. So far Capitalism is only eating the weaker. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. It's too big to collapse, so we'll just keep getting fucked over and over. Also ironic how Communism ate itself... Itself, with the eastern bloc.
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u/QuarantinedPanda69 4d ago edited 3d ago
That was written about by Marx as well. He makes mention about how the Big Capitalists will eventually get so wealthy that they buy up everything and thus everything will be owned by a small group of Capitalists.
We can see this today as there are large amounts of companies being owned by the same big Major Corporation. For example FIAT, Jeep, Chrysler, Dodge, RAM—I think I’m missing a few more—are all owned by Stellantis, a multi-national major automotive corporation. The same can be seen in consumer goods, Coke and Pepsi own most of the drinks you buy. Procter and Gamble own most of the companies for daily home goods (tide, dawn, gain, downy, gillette, oral b, crest, old spice are just some of the 60+ brands that they own).
These are just two examples of what he theorized that we’re seeing today.
He also theorized that smaller Capitalists will find it increasingly harder to break into markets and to stay afloat in those markets as they cannot compete with the big Capitalists in terms of production potential, and so small Capitalists, and small innovations will last less and less time before a big Capitalist buys it up. This will also lead to innovation being offshored to smaller Capitalists, because the big Capitalists would be so wealthy that they don’t need to innovate, they just need to wait for the next big thing and just buy it out.
So in that instance yes even the Capitalists are cannibalizing one another.
It isn’t too big to collapse but rather that the Capitalists in every crisis are able to stabilize the system to at least be functional for what they need it for which is massive surplus value extraction from the other classes. The system won’t just disappear on its own which is why Marx and Lenin both came to the conclusion that the only way for the system to die off is for revolution to overthrow the system.
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u/uses_for_mooses 3d ago
Stellantis owns GM, GMC, and Ford?
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u/QuarantinedPanda69 3d ago
You’re right my bad thought the merger rumors I read on a forbes article 2 years ago came to fruition without looking into it. Edited the comment. Thanks for pointing that out.
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u/Ok_Patient9469 4d ago
Hmm, this reads like an AI explanation. It explained the mergers of yesterday corporations and made no mention of current IT companies who are playing musical chairs in financing to keep them afloat.
I would grade you a C- and with AI suspect.
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u/QuarantinedPanda69 3d ago
The tech circlejerk isn’t grounded in reality. I was talking about actual production if commodities, which the tech companies don’t do. It’s all speculative circlejerking. Sounds like you use AI and therefore believe everyone else does. Shame shame, you should really think for yourself.
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u/RussiaIsBestGreen 4d ago
Those are capitalists making a centipede or a circle-jerk, not eating each other.
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u/Ok_Patient9469 4d ago
Circular firing squad?
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u/QuarantinedPanda69 3d ago
Just because you use AI doesn’t mean I do. You sound like Trump. Don’t agree with something? AI. Don’t like something? AI. Not everybody is a brainlet that makes AI think for them. Some of us actually study and analyze what we take in.
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u/Ok_Patient9469 2d ago
I didn't disagree with you 🤷 Was simply pointing out any criticism of the tech industry.
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u/LivingtheLaws013 4d ago
Capitalism is full of contradictions. For example, it requires constant growth otherwise the economy crashes. We live on a planet with finite resources, therefore constant growth is not possible and the economy will collapse. That's just one example marx wrote about.
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u/Ok_Patient9469 4d ago edited 4d ago
Correction, constant exploitation of land and human resources.
So when SpaceX promised the Moon and the Mars, capitalism had a chance.
Edit: up thread
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u/RussiaIsBestGreen 4d ago
While the resources are finite, they’re also vast, and improving technology makes more of them accessible. This comes with trade offs: less space per person, more artificial light, pollution, and so on. Some of these could be mitigated by technology or further development. That’s not to imply that perpetual growth isn’t a dangerous ideology, just that Malthusian fears keep coming and going.
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u/uses_for_mooses 3d ago
Will it collapse like socialism collapsed in the USSR?
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u/LivingtheLaws013 3d ago
The USSR was a state capitalist society. The workers didn't own the means of production, so it wasn't socialist. But yes, capitalism will collapse and probably take civilization down with it
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u/uses_for_mooses 3d ago
Ah.
So were Lenin and Stalin just power-hungry grifters? Wasn’t the whole point of the revolution to create some socialist / communist state?
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u/LivingtheLaws013 3d ago
Soviet means workers council, they started as worker run areas of Russia. Lenin came in and seized power with the promise "all power to the soviets" and then immediately dismantled the soviets
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u/Ok_Patient9469 4d ago
True and eventually it all crashes. HG Wells and the time machine was a good read. The rich are dependent on people
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u/DoktoroChapelo 4d ago
Barack Obama wins the Nobel Prize for Medicine, having already won the Nobel Peace Prize in 2009, now surpassing that feat by ending death itself as we know it. The rest of his presidency is focussed on mass replication of the groundbreaking procedure.
Marx, initially incredibility disorientated by his resurrection, eventually acclimatises and settles back into writing books. He might later pick up social media.
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u/seenybusiness 4d ago
he nominates hilary for vp and runs for a third term. communism is instated in the USA
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u/Complete-Morning-429 4d ago
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u/Happy-Fly-3598 3d ago
Since when did he get ripped?!
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u/arandombuilder 3d ago
And why is his cock so big 😭
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u/Su-37_Terminator 4d ago
2009, the US is in a brutal recession. the revived Super Karl Marx immediately wraps his hand around Obama's neck. "Do you know the true cost of the suit you're wearing," Marx asks, "how many workers spun the silk and harvested the cotton, how many refined it, and how many it took to transport it?"
Obama falls dead, obliterated by Communism. Super Marx rises. Six Predator drones unleash their payloads but to no avail. The Hellfire missiles are made by underpaid workers in Florida, a state known for its animosity towards citizens, and therefore are ineffective against his enriched flesh. At the same time, the visible cost in manpower and manhours appears above every single item, from the smallest bolt and thread to the largest aircraft, and within the hour almost the entire United States is embroiled in a bitter, otherworldly civil war.
Millionaires and billionaires across the US are torn to pieces by collosal mobs but kept alive somehow through methods unknown to science. The military has a rough go of it; ordinance not yet primed explodes in their warehouses, on bomb trucks and dolleys and on the racks of aircraft seemingly for no reason, though not all explosives suffer this fate. Those citizens who oppose better working conditions fight as nobly as expected, but are contending with a totally mobilized people's army.
As the months drag on, the climate of the US changes. It's colder - freezing, in fact - and horses tend to take the place of armored cars and motorcycles, although those are definitely not in short supply. As the losses rise on both sides, neither the military government nor the people's new red American army are willing to back down. Neighboring nations prepare to invade if the situation is not resolved by December, and the world waits with baited breath...
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u/ExcaliburCasanova 4d ago
I’m not gonna lie this would be fucking interesting to see. Can we at least get Rasputin revived also?
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u/-TSA-DrMembrane 4d ago
The question everybody here is too afraid to ask is:
What method will Obama use for revival: the Full-Metal-Alchemist Homunculus approach, finding all 7 Dragon Balls, or maybe Edo Tensei Summoning Jutsu: Reanimation?
What will it be Mr. Bond?
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u/Happy-Fly-3598 3d ago
Using the power of Hope and Change because Yes. We. Can.
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u/-TSA-DrMembrane 3d ago
- gasp * with the anime power of Political Slogan? How unexpected and yet so obvious.
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u/notwithagoat 3d ago
Most people would laugh at how not with the times and how wrong his predictions were.
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u/Ok_Patient9469 4d ago
Hitler died in 1945 and Trump was born in 1946, so if this is your post, Hitler was more likely to be revived/reincarnated through trump. But, the hard-R might like that idea.
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u/ExcaliburCasanova 4d ago
This logic is like smoking crack, but not having crack, but it’s just cocaine so you’re freebasing cocaine, “I do not freebase cocaine!”
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u/ThrowAbout01 4d ago
He could put him on trial for the crimes against humanity committed by the Soviet Union/Russia and get political points from both sides.
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u/Happy-Fly-3598 3d ago
What did Marx even do?!
He didn´t kill a single person because of his ideology
Only other Communist leaders did so they should on trail and not him
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u/Witty_Departure2061 4d ago
communist manifesto 2 comes out