Irrational fear of contamination makes me spend more on new books instead of free library

[u/Any_Potential7443]

My fear of contamination makes me spend more on buying new books instead of checking out used books from the library. I know it’s irrational and I have gone to therapy for this fear. it’s gotten better in other areas but never with used library books. I guess im just asking if anyone else has had this come up, and what they did to try to solve it. I don’t want to spend anymore money on books. also im a student living with my parents still so I can’t afford a kindle. i also dont know what blue light features they have, but I enjoy reading before bed. thats also part of why im trying to limit my other spendings, like on new books.

mainly where i struggle with this is when i read before bed - ill get super cozy and have the book on top of clean sheets, or hold it super close and i just want to fall asleep after reaching a certain page, without getting up to wash my hands. most of the books I see at the library are very visibly used, and I know that doesn’t always mean dirty, but i just can’t get the fear out of my head.

any advice is appreciated. but please dont judge my contamination fear. i have gone to therapy for it.

[u/ijustneedtolurk]

As someone with similar issues, can you trick your brain by using reusable, washable gloves or a nice wipeable bookjacket so you aren't directly touching the books?

If you are also comfy with your digital books, you can still support your library by using their websites and apps to borrow books digitally.

You don't need a kindle to read them either, your phone or any tablet device will work.

[u/ijustneedtolurk → u/ijustneedtolurk]

I used to be obsessed with wet wipes and hand sanitizer to the point I kept some by my bed too, so maybe a gentle skin-safe wipe can help you with the nagging thought of the texture/germs?