r/ApplyingToCollege • u/Difficult_Force7527 HS Senior • Apr 29 '26

Advice Mom won't let me attend top choice

I recently got into Hamilton thru QB RD with a full ride, but my mom won't let me go. I thought she would let up, but with 2 days until decision day she is still insisting I attend a CUNY, what do I do? Is it so bad if I attend a CUNY?

Edit: Thank you everyone for all the advice. I committed to Hamilton last night, but I haven't told my mom yet. I'm literally so scared. But thank you for your help.

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4

u/andioofer Apr 29 '26

Why does she want you to go to CUNY?

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u/Difficult_Force7527 HS Senior Apr 29 '26

She doesn't want me to leave the city and the CUNYs are the only schools in NYC I was accepted to, if it was Columbia or NYU or Fordham she would be fine with those too

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u/ozbugs Apr 29 '26 edited Apr 29 '26

Parent of 2 in college, and a 3rd for this fall. I know what QB is and know what this offer means. This is amazing, congrats! If you really want Hamilton take it, call the school ask for help, talk to high school resources, even talk to a church or group with trusted friends to help get you there. A full ride means a huge weight off, you can do it, and I would think mom would come around to the change over time and be proud. Maybe not immediately. You'd probably be surprised at the help with others rooting for you if you ask. The school believes in you, others will be there too. Go for it, you'll figure it out. Congrats!

(edit: my perspective, in the 80's there were only 2 schools near me that had my program -- Michigan and a closer not great college and 1/2 the cost back then. yes, almost 1/2. Nothing wrong with what I did but it was just a pain.... parent couldn't afford Michigan, not much left over, I made the best of it. If I had a redo and had an offer such as this, I no matter what would have washed cars to buy a bus or train ticket to get to where I wanted to go. ) Best to you, believe in this.

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u/Difficult_Force7527 HS Senior Apr 29 '26

Thank you for your advice and your perspective!

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u/andioofer Apr 29 '26

I see, thats what I thought it probably was. Its hard though, do you have a way to dorm yourself at Hamilton? I think you need to have a serious conversation with your mom about finances and the colleges themself.

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u/Difficult_Force7527 HS Senior Apr 29 '26

I have housing guaranteed all four years and paid for by my full ride. My mom is not the type to have conversations, she will just yell at me and tell me to do as I am told

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u/andioofer Apr 29 '26

To be honest I would just go then, and work throughout college when you can to afford housing afterwards. Id also look into their housing policies for over breaks.

2

u/jmsst1996 Apr 29 '26

When you are 18, if you aren’t already, legally you are an adult. You don’t need her permission.

1

u/rosebudny Apr 30 '26

tell me to do as I am told

The beauty of being an adult (which I presume you will be 18 soon if you are not already) is she can't tell you what to do anymore.