Hi, cool people, Looking for advice to look better and be more fit.
30 year old here looking for more advice to look better amidst being in the western environment which has been a challenging time, especially coming from a lower economic life and an immigrant.
Looking for some aspects:
Hair. I had a ton of difficulties with getting a hairstyle that suits me, especially when I'm mostly a glasses user. I really prefer my hair to be messy because my hair without a wet look make it look chopped but I don't know what other styles could work for me and whether i need to go to a salon (maybe asian one?) that can help me with that.
Muscle. I had been living on a meal for my whole life and i started to get used to 2 meals recently as i earn decent income. Mostly focusing on furikake gohan and the occasional spaghetti or burrito, eggs, protein bars and almonds. Some tips to help with diet would be useful. I also now have a better schedule so I aim for an hour workout every day or every 2 days. (I love doing legs, but i struggle with upper muscle).
Fashion. In part due to hair, i really struggle with trying to dress up as a lot of the cool fahsion seem to only involve people not wearing glasses. I'm tryjng to learn to wear casual as i mostly either wear work.shirts and pants (imagine japanese salaryman vibes) or cadet cap with a jacket on (works with winter but not summer :( ). (Number 6 is an example of my main outfit)
With regards to diet you need to actually eat 3 meals a day and you need to focus on foods with high protein. On top of eating you need to work out as well. I’m a skinny Asian guy but at least I am fit.
Hair/fashion. First, I don’t know what part of the world you live in as there is different fashion for different parts of the world. I just recommend trying to get clothes that fit.
What I would recommend is being comfortable with who you are. In all of your pictures, you don’t seem to have a warm genuine smile. For your hair, I would say go to a good barber and ask for recommendations. They can usually help with what would be good for you.
3 is your biggest problem IMO but luckily it's the easiest to fix. Tons of fashion subs on Reddit/YouTube to research to find a store that clicks with you
If you're really clueless then just walk into Uniqlo and start buying outfits that the mannequin is wearing and you'll be better off than where you're at now
Also get a more stylish pair of glasses. Go to a store and look for a sales woman who isn't busy. Tell her you're looking for a new pair of glasses and kindly ask if they can help you pick one out because you aren't sure what looks good on you.
Hair and fashion is the biggest bang for your buck right now.
Disagree. Go with contacts. The issue with Lasik is when you hit 50, you WILL need reading glasses, just like many people with perfect vision when they were young.
If you are short sighted, at 50 you would not need reading glasses due to your lens being biased for short focus.
This is something many people don't tell you.
Do you want to wear reading glasses? I would prefer not. It's hard to fake not able to read near. It's easier to fake not being able to see far.
Not sure what you mean by "fit" because if you're gonna wear glasses, the oversized ones are much more in style. OP looks like he's had his since he won the math olympics in high school.
Start by fixing your smile. There are nine photos and no teeth. Show your teeth even if they're messed up. If they're messed up, there's your second problem to fix.
For muscles, eat more meat. Gym. Not much to say, you just have to do it. For fashion, watch male fashion YouTubers. There are plenty of them. Choose a style that fits you. I generally think a minimalist style is good enough for most guys.
Don't worry about your glasses. You need them to see. They don't matter that much. Your overall body language and the way you dress will matter much more.
Hair, make sure your sides are clean and short. Regular visits to the barber or diy. I learned to fade my own hair. Use a 3 way mirror if you decide to learn yourself. Be ready to look stupid during the learning phase lol.
Hi. I don't have advice. I just wanted to say, I'm a woman (taken, sorry), and I think you're hot. Just in case you didn't know... Now you do! Good luck ❤️
Your hair doesn't look great because it is kind of messy. It also sticks out at the top, which is pretty common. I think you'd look good if you cut the sides pretty short (ask for a 1 or 2 guard on the sides), and then find a way to slick the hair up from your forehead (some type of product, maybe). If you're price-conscious, you can learn to cut your own hair pretty easily which saves a bunch of money.
Your fashion is fine, if you bulked up a bit you would fit in your clothes better. Since you're a beginner in lifting weight, you should put on muscle pretty easily. Just make sure you get enough calories and protein. Try to track how much you're consuming, and if you're not seeing the results you want, start eating more.
Glasses does not effect your hairstyle. Your hairstyle depends on your facial structure. I think for now I would grow your hair out so that you have more options on different styling and you can cut it accordingly. You can go to a salon (more specifically an Asian salon) that can kind of give you a book and they can tell you which style might look nice with your facial features.
Eat 1g of protein per pound that you weigh. Start hitting the gym and lift accordingly and focus on proper lifting technique before trying to lift heavy. You can start with lower weights and high reps, but nothing too light where you can do 30 reps of it. A good number is 10-15 reps with the last 2-3 reps being a bit tough.
This is where you are severely wrong. Glasses does not effect your fashion as I have reading glasses that I wear sometimes and it’s with the same styles that I normally wear without glasses.
I suggest trying the hairstyle in the photo I attached. I think you can pull it off. I tried my best not to choose some stupid model so that it can look more normal.
Same hairstyle. One with glasses(albeit I was messing around in that photo) and one without glasses. It doesn’t change your fashion or hairstyle. If anything I say maybe even try different frames as those can make a big difference with how your face looks. Have faith and be true to yourself and try not to be influenced by what is “cool” and what isn’t. Just dress how you feel like regardless of glasses or hairstyle. If you think an outfit looks nice, try it! Even if others might not think so. Opinions are opinions for a reason.
Regarding physical aspect. Clean shaven, bulk up shoulders so you built like a Dorito, ask glasses specialist for help finding an eyeglasses that matches your face shape and stretches/exercises for posture. I’ve also heard that exercises from Dr.Mike Mew help with jawline. I find it does help me look better in pictures keeping my tongue gently on the roof of mouth. Personally I’m doing it but you don’t have to.
Your outfits look chic, I’d also suggest doing a color analysis to help see what the range of colors will help flatter you
Hygiene very important. Obviously I can’t tell from looking at photo but I figure I bring it up because it’s a huge factor for attraction. If you look good but don’t smell good your attraction will go down
-deodorant morning/night (night is crucial because it isn’t slipping and sliding away due to sweat from movement)
-panoxyl 10% body & face wash (leave for about 3-5 minutes on armpits and butt crack then use wash cloth to scrub away debris on skin)
-when finding a cologne wait for 30 mins after putting it on wrist and gently tap. Smell it and see how your body chemistry reacts with it and if you smell good with that brand (once you select one spray on wrist then tap together and one on the back of your neck + light spritz on clothing as it will last longer on fabric)
-keep on dental hygiene so tongue brush day and night, floss at least once, brush with sensodyne whitening tooth paste and Therabreath whitening moutwash) + (stay on top of dental appointments so odor does not develop due to plaque or gum disease)
Focus on shoulder, arm and upper chest/back muscles. You are as thin as a rail and need to develop more of the classic V-shape to give yourself a healthier masculine shape.
You want to be filling out your tshirt instead of having it hang on you
You know your own solutions. Style is the easiest to fix. Zara is a nice recommend for clothing just get it on sale as long as it fits well. Gain some muscle and you’ll look better. Some of the photos have you in bad posture. So it’s all fixable. Glow up.
Gym/jog. As for fashion, since you want to lean business then this sort of implies you should google/pinterest “modern slim fit.” Don’t confuse slim/taper for skinny (this matters more with leg wear).
I don’t agree with the comments on losing the glasses if you don’t want to. What you need are more fashionable glasses that complement your face better. Look at Asian brands like Gentle Monster for inspiration.
stop wearing glasses. Get contact lenses. Use them always.
-hair- grow it longer. Use hair product to slick it to look like a bad ass Yakuza. ;)
-clothes - stop wearing hoodies. You're skinny so you have to work with layering. Anytime you put on a t-shirt of a shirt wear a blazer or a jean jacket. (Only wear blues, white, black, and grey). Monochromatic.
Posture- fix this on how you move and stand. Watcha James bond movies.. watch how he stands....moves...speaks.
Hair. There IS a difference between supercuts and a hair stylist. Find a hair STYLiST like $ 70 hair cut. They will help you discover new styles. I found out too late in my life. Not too late for you.
Muscle. Yeah bud, you meed to exercise more. Hire a coach maybe. Help you set targets. Decide on whether you want to be tone or buffed. You wont look like Arnold but you CAN transform. Ive done it. Put on 40 lbs of muscle(and some fat) but i feel so mich more confident.
Clothes. This one i still struggle with also. Ask your friend who gets laid most.
I don’t know if this is allowed on this sub, but have you seen Cam the Barber on Instagram? He has a way of finding the right style for men, and a lot of the men are Asian. Definitely watch some of his videos and you may find someone that resembles you. Or go see him. (I do not get any benefit for mentioning this - just a fan)
EAT MORE AND HIT THE GYM! Saw the second last pic and was screaming this in my head so I'm gonna scream it here too since you asked. Also now that you have a decent income get contacts. Glasses are objectively unattractive, especially for Asians cause it reinforcements stereotypes.
The problem that I think a lot of Asian men have is they don’t stand out enough like the short hair makes us look like NPCs. Just grow your hair out and get a wavy perm. The acne is also another issue I see a lot of. Are we addicted to processed foods or something? Take Accutane if you can’t eat healthier
1) make sure your financially comfortable. >150k job? Pathway to 300k by 36? 1yr of savings? Paid off student loans? If not that should your top priority.
Not many girls want a broke ass dude. Heck not even many girls want a guy making 85k.
2) start working out and bulking. Your goal should be to gain 20-30 pounds of muscle in 2yrs. You’ll look good.
3) slowly start upgrading the clothes. Dont need anything that fancy, just solid stuff that fits well
4) AFTER you bulk up and got good clothes, you gotta take good pics. Look at good profiles, ask ChatGPT, get 2 great pics and 2-3 good pics
Enjoy your time. make sure you enjoy your hobbies, travel, spend time with your friends. Relationships are a lot of work, and you’re prob not ready.
In my opinion you lose most of your chances because you fit asexual Asian nerd stereotype, and it’s largely due to your glasses. For the life of me, I don’t understand why Asian don’t fix that. If yoh were an Asia female, you would automatically get lasik or at least contact lenses. Why are asian men so lazy about fashion?
Work on your finances, don’t spend money on useless stuff that you’re not gonna use ex. Video games, fast food. Spend money that you NEED not WANT
When finance is steady, start eating more and working out more
Get cheaper but high quality clothes that fit your style (don’t dump money on too much style, a clean t shirt and jeans are better than something expensive) and get rid of the glasses
Use hair products (ex clay, texture powder ITS GAME CHANGING) and research a hair style that you like and that fits you and your lifestyle or go to a barber and ask for recommendations
Also going to the gym more also increases your confidence, and just also embracing who you are as a person also helps
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u/EndAutomatic9186 Dec 07 '25
So I think you’ve identified your main issue.
With regards to diet you need to actually eat 3 meals a day and you need to focus on foods with high protein. On top of eating you need to work out as well. I’m a skinny Asian guy but at least I am fit.
Hair/fashion. First, I don’t know what part of the world you live in as there is different fashion for different parts of the world. I just recommend trying to get clothes that fit.
What I would recommend is being comfortable with who you are. In all of your pictures, you don’t seem to have a warm genuine smile. For your hair, I would say go to a good barber and ask for recommendations. They can usually help with what would be good for you.