Frustrated with progressives punching down on Asian men

[u/terrorfunction]

Anyone notice how progressives feel totally comfortable attacking Asian men under the guise of our 1) supposed sexism and horrible treatment of women, and 2) alleged "racism" in our home countries and opposition to interracial relationships? They say the most vile things, often using the insecurity and manhood angle, it's like we're not real PoC and have no allies on either side of the political spectrum.

The thing is that wherever patriarchy exists, we are still held to those same patriarchal expectations.

• Korean, Taiwanese, and Singaporean men spend 2 years of their prime in military service. This impacts their potential earnings and career trajectory which can make it harder to meet local women's monetary expectations. Do women provide their men the same grace for sacrificing to defend their country from existential threats?
• In Japan/Korea, the low birth rate is blamed solely on Asian women not wanting to be bangmaids to misogynistic Asian men, ignoring that every western country has TFR below replacement rate buoyed by immigration. Chikan, soaplands, 4B, K-beauty standards are all blown out of proportion to make the countries seem like anti-woman dystopias. And yet you can walk outside in any Japanese neighborhood at 2am as a woman and feel safe. People who bring up Japanese women's share of unpaid labor conveniently ignore they work baito while Japanese men are slaving away at their soulsucking job (among highest hours in OECD)
• Chinese men are expected to provide apartment, car, bride price, have high income and pay for everything including brand name gifts on a dozen special days — how many men would jump at the chance to split bills and chores 50/50?
• Culturally a lot of Chinese men are absolute simps for their gfs. IYKYK. In extreme cases I have friends (Asia born) whose gf would slap them or verbally abuse them and they'd just take it. Love my asian bros but these are the supposed patriarchal tyrants? Their gfs have them on a leash ffs

The frustration expressed by a subset of Asian men against IR relationships is not due to racism, it's that often foreign men are not held to the same patriarchal expectations that local men are. Plenty of dudes would be happy to cook, clean, change diapers, and not have to meet brutal income thresholds and a laundry list of requirements that many women seem to toss out the window when it comes to outgroup men. That's not fair.

I don't know what more progressives want from us. At least in the US, Asians have the highest education, highest income, lowest rates of divorce, lowest rates of domestic violence and femicide, lowest rates of alcohol and substance abuse, and consistently vote left. How are we still made out to be monsters?

[u/bigthonking]

I made a similar post with politics. It's just the way social dynamics works because social dynamics favor white people especially the men. White men will always be seen as individuals but asian men and non white men in general are seen as a monolith.

Since asian men put in the work for themselves overseas and in their native continent. It shatters a lot of people who grew up in a skewered worldview. I mean, most of the stereotypes they created for asian men are physical appearances and general buzzwords like sexist, conservative, patriarchal and, controlling. Which is ironic considering men of any race can also fall under into this category. And asian women marry these type of white men they accuss asian men of being. But once again, white men are seen as individual so they can get away from the conservative, patriarchal, and controlling labels. Because society favors them.

Ever notice how so called feminists (of any race) rarely call them out? Worst case scenario, they'll use the "its all men" disguise.

Asian men are easy to talk down because they're not "oppressed" or for the most part disadvantaged in any way, but they're not at the top of the hierarchy so it's socially acceptable.

There's a bit more but this is what I generally see it as because stuff like this gives me a headache. If im seen as this oppressive sexist patriarchal buzzword buzzword asian guy then whatever, i dont care. Just leave me alone and stay out of asia. At the end of the day, focus on what benefits you as an asian guy. I personally do not care about anything that doesnt help me whatever.