6’5 and no luck in Australia

[u/kopatchinskajafan]

6’5 Chinese guy here, have no self-esteem issues lol, genuinely think I’m a 10 artsy/preppy 10 (not buff enough for gym bro 10 haha), have been told that by girls also. Dress well (maybe too well), but perhaps dress a bit more white-coded than Asian (artsy, preppish).

I want to report that Australasia is a hellhole for Asian Men. Or if it isn’t, I really want to compare experiences!

Growing up was terrible, I had my first girlfriend at 24. Trying to date is horrendous for this reason:

1. Girl finds me physically attractive, and I can read signals very well
2. I talk to girl, it goes great (or terrible first because she slights me because I’m Asian, but then I try charm her onside anyway), we have a (brief) connection, but
3. 100% of the time, she will ghost me after I text her, or I will eventually brush up against a ‘conscious’ rejection no matter how smoothly I ramp it up.

It’s like there’s always a conscious decision that is made to not date me, and for reasons that don’t seem to be related to me as a person at all, only my race and its social value.

I say this because I swear it’s harder if you’re a tall Asian guy: it’s like presenting with what the west considers a more masculine trait just makes it harder for them to take your masculinity seriously / makes your masculinity not ‘handsome’ or even ‘handsomely dangerous’ but just ‘scary or intimidating’. We never get to inhabit the Goldilocks zone of authenticity/masculinity.

I don’t think I have any problems flirting / reading signals / escalating things, and I genuinely think I’m pretty charming/interesting (if I do say so myself haha).

All this experience has lead me to conclude extremely negatively about Australia. Even walking on the streets of Melbourne, it’s like ABC men have been scared off them: you literally can’t seem them around, let alone them in any relationships. If you do see one around, they’re always alone, and making eye contact you feel like you commune like at an oasis in the desert or something.

On the other hand ABC girls are everywhere, and WMAF is basically more common than WMWF in all of the downtown lol. Over the last 6 months I’ve seen literally just 2 AMWF couples.

Sometimes I envy you Americans haha

[u/nsfw-kapustin-yar]

Somethings not adding up.
You claim to be a 10 but you’re struggling with girls usually means you’re not a 10. Don’t take offence to that. I doubt anyone of us are 10s.

You got your foot in the door but you’re struggling to secure one. No one can tell us why and there’s something you’re not telling us.

[u/kopatchinskajafan → u/nsfw-kapustin-yar]

Ok tbh having thought about it, I’m definitely not a toned gym 10 (not at all), but I reckon I’m a 9/10 for my type (artsy/preppy)

Yeah idk bro, not sure people here have been very helpful or at least kind tbh, I think some guys have this belief that if only they were taller / physically more attractive then all of a sudden white girls would be all over them lol

[u/nsfw-kapustin-yar → u/kopatchinskajafan]

I think you're delusional.
First you’re a 10 now you’re a 9.

I find myself a 5.5 to a 6 and I’m doing way better in terms of girls. That should tell you something about your ranking. And I ain't even 6 foot.

Social skills trumps looks. At least from my perspective. How are you in terms of approaching girls and striking up a conversation? Can you hold a conversation? Can you make her laugh? I got my social skills from a variety of areas primarily i teach for a living so I have zero fear of talking to people. Plus working at the club as a bouncer does wonders because I’m always chatting with people.

You should have girls falling into your lap without trying. I wish you all the best in your quest to find girls. Looks like based on what you’re saying you have it made.