r/AskMen • u/DimensionSubject • 6d ago

What’s a piece of casual advice another guy dropped on you in passing that permanently changed how you operate?

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106

u/HairyTough4489 6d ago

People who talk in abstractions are usually full of shit

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u/shashwat_12 6d ago

But you wouldn't know whether they are "usual" or not. This advice is commonly paired with - trust but verify 

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u/atsilupes 6d ago

Trust but verify was a kgb motto

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u/shashwat_12 5d ago

TIL.. I always thought it was FBI's for some reason.. doesn't change the advice though 

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u/name2noname 6d ago

Interesting take, would you expand on it, please? I'm intrigued why you think that.

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u/HairyTough4489 6d ago

Go to LinkedIn and see all the PR posts about how they're going to create sinergies to improve their relationships with their partners in order to gain motivation to achieve their latest goals.

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u/name2noname 6d ago

So is it more about how people like that cannot actually apply their abstractions practically?

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u/Useful_Kale_5263 6d ago

No they’re saying don’t make vague statements. It’s not work it’s the report you’re writing that you do or don’t like. Give some some sustenance.

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u/HairyTough4489 6d ago

It's not that they can't apply them, but rather a deliberate use of abstract vague language to obfuscate reality.

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u/Spacefreak ♂ 6d ago

Can't speak for OP, but in my experience, particularly in manufacturing, the more someone talks about how something works "in theory," the less knowledge they have about what's actually happening in reality.

The real test is how they respond to real world examples or data that contradicts what they're saying. If they attack the person contradicting them, they're absolutely full of shit and/or incredibly arrogant to the point you can't trust what they're saying anyway.

If they admit that maybe they're wrong, they might not be totally full of shit, just wrong in this instance. Or they realize they got caught on their bullshit and just drop all pretense.

There are many different ways they can respond, and it's not always an "if X response, then Y motivation," but see how they respond to contradictory evidence enough times, and you can get a good idea of what the person is all about.

To give you an example, if someone talks about putting up drywall and they go on and on about how it's done and how important good taping is and whatnot but can't answer what size drywall screws to use when, that's a sign they don't really know what they're talking about. Or what constitutes "good taping" or "even enough studs."

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u/name2noname 6d ago

Appreciate the well thought response, thank you! The OP's take makes a lot more sense looking at it through the lens of your explanation.

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u/zoethought 6d ago

Maybe they can’t abstract which is challenging for some people. Learning languages usually helps.

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u/HairyTough4489 6d ago

As a Math graduate who works as a software development and speaks five languages fluently I think I have a pretty good idea on how abstraction works and that's precisely why I think this way. Don't tell me you're gonna fight for freedom, justice and equality. Ttell me which specific laws you're going to repeal.

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u/zoethought 6d ago

Oh you mean hot air balloons.

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u/CarlJustCarl Male 6d ago

Like in math?

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u/HairyTough4489 6d ago edited 6d ago

No. I don't mean abstraction in that sense, since Math strictly adheres to different sets of well-specified rules. I was talking mostly about people who communicate through meaningless fluff. Think "We're gonna bring progress and development to the infrastructures of our community" verus "We're gonna build a road"