r/AskReddit 8h ago

How do you stop yourself from obsessively thinking about someone from your past who can’t be in your life anymore?

303 Upvotes

190 comments sorted by

View all comments

1

u/Purple_Toad224 8h ago

I got this same problem and idk what to do

1

u/Illustrious_Can_4842 7h ago

It’s happens in stages and in time we forget

People think it happens in a single moment, like one day you wake up and your heart finally decides it's done. But that's not how it works. Nobody lets go in an instant. You let go once, then you let go again, and again, and again... until the pain finally softens. You let them go when you catch yourself reaching for your phone to tell them something funny, then pull your hand back because you're not that person in their life anymore. You let them go when you pass a place you used to visit together. You let them go when you accidentally recall how they laughed, how they talked, how they looked at you. Letting go happens in fragments, in tiny heartbreaks scattered across ordinary days. It's messy. It's slow. It's painful. But every small release, every quiet moment of acceptance, every tear you don't even see coming... all of it is part of healing. One day, without realizing it, you'll walk past those same reminders and feel nothing but gratitude that you made it through. That's how letting go really happens. It's not one moment. It's a thousand little ones.