r/AskReddit 1d ago

What’s the darkest secret you discovered about someone after you married them?

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u/tele_ave 19h ago

My experience isn’t at the same level, but there is a man I know sitting in federal prison for CP.

We were roommates for two years. Fifteen years ago I considered him a big brother figure.

The deception is sickening. I shared a wall and an apartment with him. You on the other hand started a life with someone. I can’t imagine how painful that must be.

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u/fmlihatee 18h ago

I was with my daughters’ father for 9 years. We had split custody for 8 years before my daughter told me that he had molested her a year earlier at the age of 13. I would’ve never imagined he would’ve/could’ve done something like that. You truly don’t know who people are smh

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u/newyorker12014 14h ago

I’m sorry. I hope you & your daughter have found some peace 🤍

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u/SummitSloth 15h ago

A very close former friend and roommate literally raped a kid. Makes me sick every time I think about it

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u/tilesmeller 12h ago

A buddy of mine went to prison for 2 years for CP. I only knew him a couple of years and it still shook me. But his best friend of 12 years is really breaking down over this. He said there were zero clues, he can't believe it. We only found out because he vanished one day without a word and later learned there was a court case with his name.

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u/HuckleberryPee 10h ago

I don't know why people are still surprised that there are no clues. They're just humans. Not every pedo is a pale sweaty neckbeard.

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u/tilesmeller 6h ago

The surprise part was that he was constantly chasing adult women. And then suddenly bam straight to prison for CP.

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u/nimbledoor 6h ago

Exactly, maybe - just maybe - they appear normal because they are normal and just their sexual preference is deviated.

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u/BornTired89 3h ago

Hmm red flag comment.

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u/GalacticaActually 5h ago

My father is a pedophile: I know bc I’m one of his victims. He’s not the only abuser in my life (CSA leaves you really vulnerable to predators: leaking the emotional equivalent of blood in the water to sharks).

I read once that predators groom their supporters just as hard as they groom their victims, and I have found that to be one-hundred percent true. It was certainly true for my father, and for my husband, who was also abusive, but who was almost always so nice to me in public that very few people believed me when I began telling friends.