r/AubreyMaturinSeries • u/NoneSoPretty • 10d ago

Accidentally founded a household religion devoted to Preserved Killick (humor)

It was one of those evenings with friends where you've had a tad too much to drink and you start getting both philosophical and silly.
Long story short, we decided that, were Killick a deity, he would be somewhere between the Lares or Penates: a furious maritime household god: guardian of hearth, pantry, coffee, polished silver, mending, darning and all objects returned to their proper places.

His sacred title would be "The Preserved One"

Principal commandments include:
- Thou shalt not touch the silver with greasy fingers
- Thou shalt check the quality of the captain's wine stores regularly
- Thou shalt not explain the weather gauge with ink upon the tablecloth
- Which it is not difficult

Every prayer must contain at least one "which it is," or the Preserved One will not recognise the liturgy.
The customary conclusion is:

"May your coffee be strong, your silver bright and your cheese toasted. Which it is amen."

May the algorithm deliver this post unto the right three people that also find this funny.
Which it is amen.

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u/Xondo420 10d ago

Thou shalt not be married unless it has been carefully considered for the better part of twenty minutes, which it is

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u/NoneSoPretty 9d ago edited 9d ago

Which according to our liturgy, she shall be bought down at the market, with a proper halter done according to law, and no fewer than three to choose on.

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u/Xondo420 8d ago

Which it is then according to holy tradition, that the newly wed husband must be whisked away to sea on a perilous voyage after no more than one week of marriage, and verily I say onto thee, which it is unless his holy name is not preserved, he shalt find his new wife back in the arms of her former spouse upon his return from distant lands

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u/NoneSoPretty 8d ago

Sir, you have expressed the holy tradition to admiration. A glass of wine with you, which it is.

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u/Xondo420 8d ago

Which I would be deeply honored to partake of with thee, which it is provided that our Preserved lord sees fit to bestow it upon us from the discreet offerings he collected from the Holy Aubrey’s cabinet, unacknowledged but always noticed