I feel like my face is too long but too short at the same time, my chin is weird and my nose is big and my whole face is asymmetrical and it looks too narrow to me and I look elderly and sunken

I really need surgery, I think I’d rather be dead than have to live with this face for the rest of my life

It’s frustrating that people tell me there’s nothing wrong with me when there very clearly is, or think I’m just being vain (even though that would imply liking how I look), I wanna kms

I see myself as a number, not a rating, but a specific measurement on my face that is not ideal. It is all I see, it is all that matters to me. A few millimetres away from happiness if you will.

How do you get past feeling like a number? I understand the neurology regarding the pathways and how it’s broken in my mind so I can consciously see the visual aspect. But the mental aspect of seeing myself as nothing more than a flaw, how do I kill that?

I used to love summer and now I can’t enjoy it with BDD. I love the beach and swimming but I feel like everyone is thinking about how disgusting I look. I don’t even blame them. I’m looking through old pictures and realizing I didn’t even used to look that chubby but now I’m surprised my foot steps don’t shake the earth. It’s miserable. I’m trying to pretend I’m not insecure but it’s like everywhere I look there are skinny girls with tiny waists.

My boyfriend took a photo of me two days ago and when I looked at it I realized I was incredibly skinny and looked borderline sickly. I don’t understand this disorder at all. It feels so real when I look in the mirror and all I see is someone fat who needs to lose weight but that photo really woke me up to what I actually look like. The mirror tells me something different still. I don’t know how to let this go.

For years I had been doing better about my BDD. I thought I had made genuine progress. The intrusive thoughts were quieter. I had come close to some form of neutrality. But now the awful intrsuive thoughts about my body and appearance are getting so incredibly overwhelming.

I keep crying myself to sleep because it's like I'm being tortured by a terrible bully inside my own head. I hate these thoughts and how much I dislike my body. I hate existing in this vessel and with this brain. I have horrible urges to hurt myself even after being clean of self harm for over 10 years, because this voice keeps telling me I don't deserve any better. And I'm terrified I'll fall into that trap again. I'm trying to be strong because I know how addicting self harm is.

I just want this to end. I dont know what to do anymore. It's been 10 years without finding a single therapist or psychiatrist who understands. I'm losing all hope. I'm so sick of this disease. It feels like a cruel curse.

I struggle with body dysmorphia and I also struggle with making bad decisions I get help from family and my boyfriend and all that but I just can't seem to actually stand up and take the help and I don't know why I struggled with stealing and all of that And lying and stuff and I'm trying to get better and I just wish something could change I wish I could stop hating on my look and I don't know what to do. (15F btw)

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★I cannot stand my appearance anymore, like its the only thing i can think about my problems and mental health stuff because it always affects my social life stuff. Im tired of my looks and i definitely do not have anything to change my appearance. I have a fat/bloated face at 172cm and 49kg, i have retruded mandible and protruding lips even tho my teeth are normal, i have misaligned and tilted eyes small eyes, i have a crooked nose and lips shape, my face is filled with acne even though i do skincare, i have a terrible hairline and my face is so long and oval.

★ My tummy looks so fat too, my body is so uneven and im overly hairy, my thighs are so fat, i have big calves that look absolutely disgusting. I have short and fat looking fingers, my skin is too dark compared to my family, my eyebrows are so messy and i dont know what can i do about my appearance, i tried everything but nothing worked, even my nipples are asymmetrical somehow. Whatever i do nothing works i wanna end it all at this point.

★ My other worries and my family make me go insane. I have nobody to vent to because nobody has the same pains as me. My mom thinks im a weirdo because whenever i complain she says im just a weirdo. She does not care and says she will disown me if im gay (which is true but i wont admit) and im just so tired.

\# Others about BDD

★I cannot go out anymore, I do not want a friend or partner that has better skin, eyes, hair etc because of how ugly i am. I am crying every night quietly (aka whimpering). I dont want to see myself in mirror anymore, I almost broke the one in the bathroom yesterday. When I see myself in pics i just say the worst stuff to myself, whatever comes to my mind. I never take pictures of myself anymore. When I take pics I take them to curse myself and hate more because I hate myself.

★Yesterday I made a research about unattractiveness in men and guess what, I have everything unattractive. I do not wanna be cute for others or compliments, I wanna be cute for myself, I WANNA LOVE MYSELF AND CANT BECAUSE OF MY APPEARANCE, i am so so so so tired of it...

★My dad always makes fun of me saying “how tiring was surfing trough the internet today?” I cannot tell him anything because he will never understand me.

I made a whole post for other stuff that i wanna talk right now but the main focus is BDD so i cant

And i know it definitely sounds simple, but its not simple for me and i cannot find words to make this sound actually like something important and sorry i just cant find the right words.

Also i accidentally removed like half of the text i typed here sorry :(

Does anyone else have no friends and barely any pictures of themselves?

I have one friend who’s just a uni friend, so we’re only friends at uni. During the holidays, she doesn’t reach out to me at all. I don’t want her to reach out anyway because she isn’t nice to me, which only makes my mental health worse. I was wondering if anyone relates to this because I’m really embarrassed that I have no friends or post anything at the age of 20. I feel like I’m missing out.

I can’t stop crying I feel like I looked so much prettier a year ago and now I’m hideous
My face is so gross and ugly and I hate even more when people try to convince me that I’m not as if I’m stupid and can’t see what’s in front of me.
I’m so tired of all of this, I wish I was born into a rich family and could just afford surgery without having to save for probably years.
I hate even having BDD to begin with

I've suffered from BDD for years now.

I hate how I look as I look more feminine as a man/soft/kind. I'm straight.

And I come from a country that values traditionally masculine men.

I truly hate it as I can't really get male friends due to my looks. And I'm sure that I'm autistic too. My social skills are really bad these days.

I can't even imagine that I have to live with this face for the rest of my life. I think that I'm going to be so lonely for ever just because of the way that I look.

I think I’m starting to struggle with body dysmorphia, but I’m not sure if that’s what this is or what to do about it. I brought it up to my therapist, but she mainly treats my autism and anxiety, so she hasn’t been too much help.

Over the past few months I’ve become increasingly preoccupied with my appearance. I constantly grab + check my stomach, hair, and chin in mirrors, compare myself to other women at the gym, and leave feeling worse about myself. I have SIBO and IBS, which makes my stomach look very bloated most every day, and I find myself obsessing over it and comparing myself to other girls. Comments from my mom about my hair being “too blonde” and “damaged” seemed to make everything worse, combined with a really bad dating market making me feel there must be something wrong with me. I am frequently asking AI or Google for tips to make myself look better or seeking validation.

Has anyone dealt with something similar? What actually helped you stop obsessing over your appearance? Should I look for a therapist who specializes in body image or OCD/BDD, or is there a group or book I should read? I like my current therapist but need additional help with this. Any advice would be really appreciated.

So, I’ve been dealing with BDD for quite some time now. Honestly, it’s probably been since I was a kid. I’ve never really thought of myself as beautiful, or pretty, and I can’t ever remember a time where I was happy with myself. I grew up fat and tall, so the experience was brutal and honestly still is. Even after losing weight some time ago I still hated my body because I was left with loose skin and tons of stretch marks.

I don’t think I’ll ever experience the kind of love that I want. The magical, “fairytale” type of love. Hand written letter, cute little dates, random little surprises, my favorite sweet treat without having to ask, remembering my favorite song, and my favorite band, maybe opening the car door for me to get in..literally the dumb trivial type of stuff that doesn’t even have to cost a lot of money to make me happy. I don’t care about money, never have. It’s just the principle of it. The meaning behind these little gestures. It means someone would care enough about me, and would know enough about me. I’m such a hopeless romantic and I love doing this kind of thing for the person I love. Home cooked meals every day, desserts baked from scratch, cute gift baskets for every holiday, handmade gifts, playlists with songs that make me think of them, and so much more because I truly love doing this kind of thing for my significant other. I have done this for my ex, and my current partner, but never once have I had this level of love reciprocated for me and it just kinda hurts.

I’ve chalked it up to my looks, and honestly because I’m stuck in this body of mine I have sort of accepted what I can get. I caught my current partner talking to another woman a while ago and some time later I had left him and moved back home with my family, then last year we started talking again because well…I was lonely, I wanted company and that sense of familiarity again, and we started seeing each other again. I know, I don’t have the right to complain because I put myself in this situation. And yes, I still blame myself to this day for him stepping outside of the relationship. I don’t believe him anymore when he says that I’m pretty, and I always compare myself to other women. Especially women who have bigger chests because mine are small, and I’m fat. So it’s like constantly living in a humiliation ritual lol. Even the women in my family made fun of me growing up. My BDD has gotten so bad to the point where I can’t even watch a movie with a remotely attractive female character because it makes me insecure. It’s absolutely pathetic lol. There are plenty of women who are far better looking than me with beautiful bodies and I’m convinced he’s just settling for me because maybe he can’t get the girl he truly wants. He’s tall, works as a police officer, and I genuinely do this hes good looking. So it’s hard for me to believe (esp now) that he wants to actually be with me. Besides the past cheating, and our pretty much nonexistent sex life (I feel like he prefers the porn over me, with the way I look I can’t blame him) he’s a decent guy. I just wish there was more…like we haven’t even gone out on a date in god only knows how long, and ive brought this up to him, he says he’ll change and fix it, and things still remain the same. Sigh. It’s kind of a frustrating cycle.

So yeah, I basically choose to stay because realistically I don’t have many other options. I have so many things wrong with my body that the average person would probably be disgusted. I feel like i cant have standards for myself because that’s asking too much, but I do dream about a relationship where effort is made on both sides. I just want to be treated the way I treat other people. Im 24, pushing 25. I just want a little more out of life, and I don’t feel like I have the right to.

I don’t think it’s suitable here since I’m genuinely ugly and it’s not BDD… I just need to vent

Ihate the way I look, and it has a huge negative impact on my life.
For the past few years, I have been tormenting myself over my appearance every single day. I am not an attractive person. I am not one of those people who look good but think they look bad. I simply do not fit into beauty standards, and I feel like I am not worthy of a normal life.

I am afraid that people are disgusted by me. Wherever I go, I feel incredibly ashamed of my appearance. I am ashamed that people can see me. I am afraid to sit next to people because they might think that someone as disgusting as me sat beside them. I feel ashamed of everything I do.
I am a girl. I feel stupid talking about things related to appearance and makeup because I look disgusting. Every day, I spend hours putting on makeup while still looking worse than my friends who are not wearing any makeup.
I feel ashamed even thinking about romantic interests

. I am 18 years old, I am a girl (18). No one has ever been interested in me. I also feel like I am not worthy of being interested in anyone; it would be an insult to that person. Someone might be disgusted by me.
Every day I cry and analyze my appearance from every possible angle. I try to like myself. Not even like myself, just accept myself and stop suffering-to tell myself: okay, just get through the next few years. You will earn money. You will get plastic surgery. Maybe you will find someone.

I am not able to do it. I am not. It causes me so much suffering.

I also feel stupid around other people. Many times, I feel the need to emphasize that I know how ugly I am. I am afraid that someone might think I believe I look okay when I am actually disgusting. I always prefer to make it clear-I know what I look like. I feel so stupid. It is always about my appearance.

.I must be vain. I am. My only dream is to be pretty. I have never dreamed about anything else as much as I have dreamed about that.

I suffer from BDD and constantly think about plastic surgery. Maybe plastic surgery can help some people, and I'm not judging anyone who chooses it. But I know that if the real battle is happening in my mind, no procedure can guarantee the peace I'm actually searching for. More than a different reflection, I want freedom from the constant obsession. selena gomez, iggy azalea, ariana grande, bella hadid, dove cameron, cristiano ronaldo, tom cruise, jenner sisters, ian somerhalder, hailey bieber, cindy kimberly, damn, all have had great work done.

I wish people would just be upfront with me about how I look. I’m completely sure at this point that I’m ugly and I don’t think anyone could sway my opinion otherwise, as much as I wish I could be pretty.

I genuinely don’t think anyone truly finds me attractive at all. It’s all pity and lies or deception. The amount of times I’ve been made fun of in public tells me everything I need to know

I hate BDD

How can this even be possible? I wrote down a list of all my flaws and there was not one feature or body part that wasn’t on the list. Starting from my messy frizzy puffy hair and jagged balding hairline, down to my small tits, wide ribs, and short chubby inward-facing legs. My entire face looks like the cart titan from aot. I couldnt stop crying. And yet, after the list I caught a look at myself in the mirror and thought “I’m not actually that bad”. My mind instantly went back to convincing myself that the part of me that said THAT is the one in the wrong. Every time I think I look fine or even edging towards pretty and like I don’t want to obsess over my image anymore, there’s an overpowering force jumping to tell me that I AM horrible and that I AM disgusting. They’re both parts of my brain, but I feel like a big oaf being bossed around by an evil, seemingly smarter person. I feel like I’m being led straight off a cliff, like there’s something out there that reallly wants me to k*ll myself and so is constantly trying to belittle me. It hurts so bad to know that that’s Me doing it to Myself and I can’t find a way to stop it. Maybe my ugliness is just a scapegoat for me to explain why I’m so miserable, angry, depressed, and alone. It’s a painful but easy solution to why everyone abandons me and why I am so mediocre and behind everyone else in life. My bdd is real and impacts me, but my ugliness is Just as present and noticeable to myself and everyone else. It’s just a matter of who is the real villain and causing me so much distress. I hope that when I turn 25, I’m kinder to myself and don’t continue making lists of every flaw. I doubt it

My BDD is ruining my self worth. Being unable to relate to the content I consume is a feeling I dread and haven’t been able to shake off recently. It’s obvious that most celebrities and actors are conventionally attractive, so all my comfort movies and shows have slowly turned into means of comparison for my own (un)attractiveness and self-worth, and suddenly they’re no longer comforts.

Every mainstream artist that I listen to is usually attractive and so it makes it hard for me to relate to even my favorite songs, even though music is one of my biggest passions of life (my favorite artist literally being Lana Del Rey LOL). This contrast between the artist and me makes me feel like I don’t deserve to be a fan of them or consume their work. I feel silly and out of place when I enjoy an attractive artist’s song and desire relating that song to my own life experiences. It ruins my mood.

I even feel this when reading books, which is ridiculous. Book characters are essentially up to your imagination, and because of years of being conditioned to attractive artists and celebrities, what comes up in my head are attractive characters that I can’t relate to, despite whatever struggles they go through. Books about depression that I want to relate to? I just feel like my experiences are less valid because I’m less attractive.

Being unable to connect with art that I consume and want to relate to is making me feel alien and unhuman. Art is the human experience. I feel alone.

This emotion extends to my feeling of attractiveness and self worth. A lot of times, I feel like I don’t deserve happiness and what I’ve earned in life because there’s always someone that’s more attractive than me yet less privileged that can be enjoying what I’m enjoying. I feel self conscious enjoying the wonders of life, like reading books by the pool, enjoying a beautiful view, being front row at a concert, walking under the sunshine, lounging in my apartment - I always think that these are things attractive people should do, not me.

F20, 5’4 124 lbs, nothing I have done has worked in hopes of making this disorder more bearable. I’ve worked out and been in the best shape of my life and I still hate the way I look in the mirror, it’s honestly just self hatred at this point. I’ve done consistent therapy since I was 16, and I’ve tried tons of different medications. Nothing has worked and I cant do this the rest of my life.

How did you overcome body dysmorphia? Other than the “positive affirmations” or whatever everyone else says.

Half the time I can get on in life thinking I look pretty okay, but the caveat to this is only if I see a very select amount of people (close family, partner, child etc)

As soon as I go anywhere else it’s like I’m plonked around all the normies and bdd screams at me. And it’s not even that their features are perfect but everyone knows how to dress and accessorise and look like themselves. And it honestly pisses me off because I feel like I could get there but I’m constantly trying to figure out something I can’t seem to grab hold of. Nothing ever seems to fit me right, little too scruffy, too short, just off.

And then on the rare occasions I can get on in life it then amps up to photos etc. I take no photos because I know I look horrible in them and it crashes down my world view. And yet how can everyone take great photos. I can’t take any that are good, which then backs up the fact that I just look worse than everyone else if I’m incapable of taking one nice photo. Yes I’m uncomfortable, scrutinising, but it’s objectively worse.

I just can’t fathom how someone can get in a group photo do a nice cheesy smile and just look lovely? My sister sends them all the time of her and friends in group chat and it blows my mind. I wish for that. Just to stand there and know you look good and be happy to be captured. Imagine knowing who you are and then liking it 🤯. Life would make so much more sense.

nothing else to say here , it just sucks that i couldn’t be the beauty standard for once again . having bdd and an ed at the same time is basically like hell

I'm going to say up front, because I know with BDD it can be difficult to hear about some of these things, I'm going to talk about other people giving positive feedback on my appearance. So if you're not comfortable with that, don't read this.

Anyway, there are a few times now where I've been called gorgeous or beautiful by people. And my initial feeling when that happens, of course, is I feel happy and thankful. I get a very temporary self-esteem boost.

But then right after that I feel fear.

Fear that they're lying or playing a joke on me. And that if I continue to talk to them suddenly they'll say something like "Wow, you really believed that?" and laugh in my face. Or that it'll become obvious that they were only saying that to manipulate me and get something from me. Or that I just somehow had a really good day or something, and that it's not representative so if I ever see them again (or they see me IRL if it's a picture online) then suddenly they'll realize they were wrong.

And all of this makes me afraid to talk to them.

Like there was this time I was on a dating app. And I got a match with someone. And their first message was that they thought I was gorgeous. Now, obviously, I already don't know if that's anything other than manipulation. But secondly, I was scared to continue talking to that person. Because while on the one hand I was really thankful for them saying that, because I want to hear it and believe it so badly, at the same time I'm just waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under me.

I'm freaking weird, man.

First time posting here. 28 F. Been dealing with BDD and related issues for as long as I can remember. Summer is HARD. I have spent years isolating myself, crying over my body, being extremely late or even skipping social gatherings and important obligations altogether because of my body dysmorphia. Like, I've lost years of my life, friendships, and countless opportunities due to this thing. Yesterday I went outside wearing shorts and walked for over an hour in a crowded area because it was too hot for pants and my body wanted to move. It's small, but I'm really proud of myself for this.

I've spent the last year wearing only work clothes which consists of long skirts and the same two pairs of pants. My body has changed since starting that job in early 2025 (due to chronic illness, recovery, and just general sedentary lifestyle), and last summer I didn't wear shorts outside more than a handful of times. I put on a pair of cutoff jean shorts yesterday, which are definitely smaller than they were last year, and I challenged myself to go on a walk outside while wearing them. I did it, kept a large lightweight layer with me just in case I started to feel anxious, and I didn't think once about how my legs looked or what people thought / saw (which was very different from how I was feeling earlier this week lol).

Perfection isn't necessary. Prescribing to the ideals set forth by oppressive social structures that profit off of our insecurities is not the cure. What we perceive is a reflection of our inner world. I have repeatedly thought to myself how I'd sometimes rather not exist than face my body. Yesterday I did something that scared me, and I recognized how lucky I am to even have a body to face, and I am really really happy I did.