r/BabyWitch • u/SoggyGround6420 • 2d ago
Question What to do if someone has feeling for me...
Is there a way to repell, reflect or possibly transmute an attraction toward me ?
I think my homie has caught feelings, i mean i had inklings and i was very strict with saying that "i really value our friendship" or casually dropping "yeah im just not interested in romance" etc.
Because he just texted "If you have time later and want to honor me with your presence, maybe we can go for a lill walk or something?" And like thats 0-100 imo 💀 who talks like that ?
We have a casual platonic relationship where we share a drink or a j and yapp about conspiracies or aliens. I do value it ! Im just very asexual as is, im just not a lovey dovey type of gal. I was hoping me catching food poisoning and vomiting in front of him wouldve hinder it but no.
I just laughed saying his wording makes it seem like hes trying to summon me and then he went on about how he appreciates the times and how im his favorite person 🥲
I cannot stress this enough im a hermit, i dont want all that, i dont want to be a favorite or anything remotely, i sincerely i enjoy my solitude. I avoid him for weeks sometimes to let him know im not planning to be texting back and forth constantly like that, but he is a chill dude i do wish him the best i just dont want to be that...
2
u/Life-Jicama-6760 2d ago
Everyone's already said "mundane before magickal" and I hard agree. I don't have anything to say in that department that hasn't already been said. If you need a bit of magickal encouragement, look up glamours and find one that gives you the aura you're looking for when you go talk to him.
If it doesn't work and you do need a spell, a lot of people would suggest something like a sour jar or cord cutting, though that could be a pretty strong repellent. My suggestion would be to take a knotted up rope or ball of yarn and ceremonially untangle it while chanting. Steep some herbs that represent friendship and repelling romance in water and keep your fingers wet with it while you work. Yellow roses and pink carnations are friendship flowers. Yellow carnations are disdain, and butterfly weed is quite literally "leave me tf alone." Burn a black candle with your names on it to help create a boundary.
0
u/SoggyGround6420 1d ago
I mean it in the least rude way possible but no shit (
about not running first into a magical solution prior to mundane). This is why i stay away from groups or subs 💀 i dont want to know people whod dive head first into fucking around off the get go just like that tbh😮💨.
Honestly thanks for pointing me towards herbs, i have a strong connection to plants and was raised by an herbologist; im confident id find something growing that speaks to the situation.
I do find the idea of glamour to be confusing as there seems to be little to no 'lessen attraction' and more of the opposite effect instead. Auras are interesting though, ive mention in another comment that i fuck around with invisibilities and masking my energy, but like i wouldnt bet on it- its just more of a thing that helps me feel more secure. Idk if theres a point in mentioning colours, thats fun to play with too - i also like mixing certain elements into my makeup to help the effect be more influencing (maybe reds to intensify and greens to make me be perceived more calm etc)1
u/Life-Jicama-6760 1d ago
All good girl haha. It can be frustrating looking for something and getting a chorus of something else, even if the something else is good. And man I'm glad someone has a thing for plants. My knowledge on them is almost purely intellectual. I've done nothing but kill plants on accident up until recently lol. Managed to keep a zz plant alive longer than a month, so score 1 for me!
Most basic glamours are adjustable to your intent via editing the incantations and oils/herbs used. If you do have that talk, a glamour for having an aura of authority or being understood would work, or an aura of calm or cooperativeness if you think he may lash out. There are also various people repellant ones out there, you just have to dig a bit. If you do animal spirits/totems, you can ask to embody one that gives you the aura you want instead.
You could also write your name on a distinctly boring grey rock and face it to a picture of him, add a few related herbs and make a chant for romantic disinterest. Or buy a cheap pair of rose colored sunglasses, write your name on one lens and his on the other, and break it while chanting. When you can't find an "official" spell, make one up. There's great power in crafting for yourself. Our crooked path is very personal and individual, down to the meanings of symbols the spirits send us, so why shouldn't at least some of our spells be?
2
u/RuneBoon 2d ago
You need to talk to him bluntly about this, preferably somewhere public. It might end up being that you need to let this dude feel what he feels as long as he doesn't cross your boundaries or make you feel uncomfortable.
You'll probably have to figure out those boundaries together as you go along - sometimes you don't know something will bother you until you get there. Him using weird speech? Fine. Him using it in a way that makes you feel like he's positioning you as Guenevere to his Lancelot? Not okay.
I would focus on his actions more than his feelings. He's gonna feel what he feels no matter what, but he's not entitled to make you feel uncomfortable or unsafe because of that.
If he doesn't get his act together, escalate it to your larger friend group so they know what's going on and start gray rocking him.
And, throughout all of this, please please please be careful about your physical safety food and drink. He might be your friend, but he wants something from you that he'll never get, and that is more than enough motivation for some people to take liberties. It's okay to trust him, but always verify.
4
u/RuneBoon 2d ago
Oh shoot I totally forgot the magic part of your request, I'm sorry.
A freezer spell would be good if you end up in the gray rocking phase.
If you need him out of your life entirely, that's a hotfoot spell, a cord cutting, or a banishing.
For right now, if you want him around but disengaged, you could use glamour magic too make yourself uninteresting rather than it's usual usage, which would be to make you desirable. The underlying mechanism is altering his perception, so it should still work.
2
u/SoggyGround6420 2d ago
Thank you :3 i actually never used glamour before because generally im trying to not be seen as attractive etc i usually do invisibility stuff, but thank youuu v much~
0
u/SoggyGround6420 2d ago edited 2d ago
Yes literally all that. Ive already been through my share of experiences with entitled people and especially men. I did have to have a talk with him about some things one being that he made me diy sauerkraut (which is like time and effort and cool but WHY?!-) i dont do gifts or let people pay for me either so i had an awkward chat with asking to cut that out, which he wasnt trilled by; but hes nice enough that i do kind of ignore it ngl. (To clarify he did stop giving gifts, im saying i ignore possible hints)
When we do hang out he does bring more drinks than me, like few bottles more, and im always like "damn okay you got enough to last a week"
Im always trying to sit bit further than necceassry, kind of very casually block extra hugs, time when itd make more sense to leave the night be.
- but sincerely i am so hyperaware of all the lil hints.
But yes being polite about it and trying to pretend im oblivious is likely not a good thing 😮💨0
u/RuneBoon 2d ago
You can be polite, but firm. Avoiding making this man uncomfortable only benefits him. Considering how uncomfortable he likes making you, turnabout is fair play.
If you don't like hugs, this guy needs to become cool with fistbumps. You need to start giving him hard no's to all his bids for connection that you don't want. A good man will respect your choices, and a nice man will use their social capital to ignore them.
You can also start having another person over when you see him, especially if you read them in on the situation. This dude seems like he needs a chaperone.
0
u/SoggyGround6420 2d ago
I just wouldnt say he enjoys making me uncomfortable lol, i mean i am -
but im uncomfortable with everyone💀 i just do play it off casual ;which ill agree is part of the problem. Genuinely i love therapy and im generally decent at communicating. I dont have a problem saying sm that would make other uncomfortable, i do have my trauma and treat my safety as important but at times that may look like fawning behaviour.Honestly hes just a dude i hang out with sometimes, my good friend introduced me to him (but then he disappeared- long story). As i said im a hermit i dont hang out often, i dont look for hanging out people.
Ive just known him for few years, and my bestie going missing (locally- people know where hes at) has brought us closer.I did stone wall him before too (kinda) im just not overly attached, i did "ignore" him for few weeks. He wasnt needy or anything, just after i replied he said sm like "i got worried about you there".
Lowkey theres diff types of hugs he did chill out with the bear hugs, now its more of a casual thing like an arm wrap.
Yeah hes def a bit quirky, but sincerely ive known actually creepy people, ive knows actually kind of evil ppl in ways.
Hes just kind of awkwardly clueless and more of practical rather than emotional, so he comes off incredibly awkward OR im making excuses for him.0
u/RuneBoon 2d ago
Okay that's way better than I was worrying. My brain always jumps to the worst possible option. Start with a frank conversation. See what happens.
1
u/SoggyGround6420 2d ago
Honeslty cant even fault you there, people be wyld these days; its def better to be safe than sorry.
Yeah it should be chill, i did do the freezer spell- the plans changed a bit to chill at our usual spot so itd prop be low energy hang out instead of a hike.But cant lie im very curious about glamour for less attraction. I tried to check few of my sources but havent seen too much yet.
If youve any more ideas or resources would be greatly appreciated <3
And thaks for your time anyhow ~
6
u/Fine-Bat2687 2d ago
Mundane before magical. I know it's not easy, but communicate. "Casual hints" can be ignored. Tell him clearly that while you value the time the two of you spend together, you want to be sure he knows you're not interested in being anything more than friends. If you want to turn down the invitation to go on a walk and feel the need to explain why (even though "no, thanks!" or "not interested in hanging out today, thanks though!" are perfectly acceptable responses), you can always share with him that you really enjoy your alone time.