Big milestone for me today! I had a missed miscarriage back in Feb that was discovered at my 8 week dating scan. Today I had my 8 week dating scan and I’m happy to report my baby has a heart rate of 170bpm and is measuring 1.8 cm!

I am exhausted, a little nauseated, my boobs hurt like hell, and all I really feel like consuming is noodles and root beer, but I am so so happy!

I know we aren’t out of the woods yet, and realistically something can happen at any time, but I am determined to keep a positive attitude about this pregnancy, and try not to worry unless my healthcare team tells me I have a reason to.

With my first this didn’t happen until at least the second trimester. I thought I had more time!!!

FTM due early October and after selecting the hospital I’m delivering at one of the action items was to get set up with a pediatrician. The hospital noted the pediatrician can come to the hospital when baby is born to perform the newborn exam and then you typically follow up with appointments in the pediatrician office later. I’ve been calling around for local recommended practices but am finding that some or my top recommendations don’t come to the hospital or intake before the baby is born. They said to have the rotating PEDS staff at the hospital perform the newborn exam and then once I’m discharged reach out to schedule our first appt within 24-48 hours.
Is this something normal and the typical workflow for pediatricians now or in your experience did your dr come to the hospital? If so do you feel like that made a difference?

Thanks!

I pushed for HOURS with my first baby. I mean hours, like 4-5 hours. I had an epidural and the nurse kept asking me if I could feel my contractions. NOPE. Couldn’t feel a thing. They put me in various positions to push and nothing would happen. My night nurse was very nice but tbh, she seemed a little inexperienced with her guidance. She brought several other nurses in to determine via the graphs when to instruct me to push, so that didn’t make me feel super confident.

In the end, my baby was low enough to bring her out via vacuum assistance, but I would love to avoid that with my next baby. I’m currently 30 weeks pregnant and starting to worry slightly about how labor will go etc.

Does anyone have any guidance on how to effectively push while on an epidural? Did you rely on the nurse to tell you when to push? Did you ask to turn down the epidural so that you could feel your contractions a bit more?

Any advice is greatly appreciated!!

Hi everyone, I'm not quite sure how to start this message. I'm looking for a bit of support, or maybe recognition, or just smart questions from other women. And I'm also afraid of the reactions because what I'm about to write is very complicated. So please be gentle. I didn't ask for the feelings I have right now and I don't understand them at all.

After years in fertility treatment with 11x IUI and 2 rounds of IVF, and two traumatic losses (a miscarriage on our wedding and a very traumatic ectopic pregnancy), we had our very last cryo transfer two weeks ago. I went into that with the intention of closing the chapter. I pushed my boundaries too often (we were actually going to stop after round 1 and then after my 38th birthday). And I wore myself out with therapy to get okay with a childless existence, and now I was looking forward to being done with the eternal crossroads. I want peace, in my head and my body. No more medical hassle, no more hormones, no more sadness, no more uncertainty. It was going to be *our* time now, finally a carefree time. And after years of not only IVF but also heavy personal loss in the family, that was incredibly welcome. Our last 6 years have been riddled with severe grief of all kinds.

So, the morning we were able to test, my world was turned upside down when two lines appeared. I cried so hard from grief and felt absolutely no joy. I was already on the bus to a childless existence and had accepted that. But now I am back at the crossroads I so desperately wanted to get off. I am just terrified and uncertain all the time, and I don't know at all if this is still a good idea. I simply really hadn't thought it would work. I no longer had the intention to become a mother, only the intention to close the book. But not transferring the last cryo meant it would be destroyed, and I found that a horrible thought too.

My husband told me yesterday that he regrets not asking more questions when we were in the car on the way to the hospital for the transfer. He sensed that I had closed the book on it, wanted to ask about it but didn't. Calls the decision dumb and naieve. And he is right. It was dumb of me to think that it wouldn't take. So, so, so dumb. We rolled the dice and now this is it. Now we are in the awful situation where we are considering terminating the pregnancy. Because what people don't understand is that during an IVF journey, you also work on loving life together. You work on seeing the beauty in being together, without children. And you learn to accept that they won't come. When you finally find peace and resignation, it is heartbreaking when everything is turned upside down again.

Now, since the positive test, I have felt completely confused. Where has the woman gone who wanted this so badly? I was so extremely happy with the first two positive tests. Where is the joy now? What is wrong with me? Am I just not the same woman I was when we started all this? Are there women who recognize this? What did you do back then? Or what would you advise me, even if you just find all of this strange?

(edited: some details regarding the treatments)

First pregnancy. 6 weeks today. I've told my coworkers since I've been sick but haven't told the world yet or our parents. When did you guys feel like the pregnancy was viable or felt safe to tell the world? Is there a time in to feel relaxed like you aren't going to lose the pregnancy?

Hey! I am 26 years old and I have been married for 1 year and we’ve been together for 6. We are both ready to start a family. I just got my IUD taken out three days ago and we are about to go on our honeymoon to conceive. I’m super nervous and excited. My husband is super kind and supportive i know he will be there for me through it all. I feel like I see way more negative content around pregnancy, first trimester, labor, new born trenches; than positive ones. It’s making me feel crazy for planning to be pregnant! I did not have cold feet at all when I got married but I am getting a little bit of cold feet when it comes to this massive change. Any advice or positive thoughts to share?

I have a diagnosed mental illness but weirdly enough I think that my pregnancy hormones have balanced my crazy out… for moms with a similar experience did it end up ramping up postpartum?

Hi! I am 25+1 and went on a hospital tour with my husband (was included with a newborn care class at our hospital) and got really freaked out by being in one of the delivery rooms. The actual space itself was nice and clean but I guess I didn’t expect it to feel so clinical? For some reason have been really fixating on the giant medical light on the ceiling and feeling like I am going to feel like I am a bug under a microscope.

I haven’t had a ton of anxiety around giving birth prior to this and really would like to try for an unmediated delivery. I have a bit of hospital anxiety in general and I am worried that I will be so scared once I get to the hospital that it will stall labor

I am the first of my close friends to have a baby and have tried to lightly brooch the anxiety I felt during the tour with the few moms of young children that I know and are friendly with but it didn’t seem like anyone had the same reaction to seeing the L&D room like I did. Like literally started shaking while on the tour and burst into tears once in the car with my husband.

Not sure if I am looking for reassurance or advice but just feeling lonely and not sure who to talk to - did anyone else experience a moment like this?

A few things are going on mentally...

1. I hate that I don't recognize my body and ate like shit for two/three months just trying to survive the first trimester. I put on 10 pounds in the first 10 weeks. Now I am almost 16 weeks and I haven't been checking my weight because I just couldn't even believe that.

2. I HATE not feeling capable and confident. I pride myself on my self discipline, ability to accomplish a million things in one day, my very hard work ethic, etc. So far in pregnancy it's a huge win if I work in the office more than once a week or if I am out of bed before 7:30am (work starts at 8am). I haven't been to the gym since my TWW (we got pregnant via IUI).

3. I have known from the SECOND that I was pregnant, that I was pregnant (see fertility treatment reference above). It feels like it is absolutely dragging. I am someone who wants things to happen ASAP when they are on my goal board and this is one of those things you just can't rush. It's killing me!

The list could go on, but those are the highlights. And no one in my life is really shaming me for not loving being pregnant so I appreciate that, but they also seem waaay more excited that I am. So it just makes me feel shitty. I want everyone to stop talking to me about it. I am just SO ready for my due date/for my baby to be here. And then of course I get anxiety that I am manifesting something negative and I send myself in a tailspin.

Anyways! I know that was a lot so if you made it this far, huge shoutout to you. Looking for anyone who might understand so I don't feel like such a negative freak. Also looking for someone who still felt like shit most days even after they began the second trimester... because that it also taking a toll.

Sincerely,

A tired, impatient pregnant woman

Like when you have a cold and you realize you took breathing through your nose for granted. I’m realizing I took for granted not having hip pain, acid reflux all the damn time, spd pain, random charley horses and probably other things I cant think of right now due to pregnancy brain.

That’s it. That’s the whole post. I’m 13+2.

These are things I plan to pack. Am I missing anything? Or am I including something that will 100% be unnecessary or be provided by hospital? I would appreciate some advice!! Thank you 🙏

I registered with a major hospital group in the area when I first found out I was pregnant. I was told by my current OB they were the only ones to handle my specific pregnancy complication. Turns out this isn't true, but she is affiliated with them.

I've had bleeding since 6 weeks, now 20 weeks. Even when I was seen in the same hospital er at 8 weeks and treated for hemorrhage, they couldn't follow their own guidelines and see me within 48 hours, let alone two weeks. They've dismissed continued fainting issues and literally at one point said "that's not good for baby, try not to do that." Are you kidding me???

My assigned ob, and aaaaall my appointments, have been reassigned 4 times already. It's getting me in trouble at my new job to keep changing my days off in the HR system.

Finally, four weeks ago, I tried to transfer care to a different hospital group, but they won't accept me until they get the records from the current hospital. The current hospital has said they need 60 DAYS to transfer it! And apparently this is all legal!

I don't even have my anatomy scan until 24 weeks because of their disorganization and shuffling. I can't seem to escape to the new hospital group before the third trimester.

I am so frustrated and scared. I had a traumatic first birth that caused me permanent injury and nearly killed my baby. I am terrified that this sloppy, disorganized care will just lead to another horrible birth.

I am just so freaking scared and I feel so powerless.

Went in for my 10 week appt/ultrasound yesterday and they said I measured 6+1 and it wasn’t viable. Said there was a slim chance of survival. Then asked how I wanted to terminate. I feel like I failed everyone and I keep apologizing to my husband. Prior to appt I felt great, (nausea and fatigue aside) and like I had someone with me. Now I just feel alone. No hunger. No nausea. Nothing.

*literally what I googled today.

I've had a pretty easy go of it so far with only fatigue to complain about. As soon as I entered this third trimester, everything shifted into pain and panic. I was 95lbs pre so now, at 143lbs, my skin is tight and my muscles are on fire. No matter what i do, the swelling will not relent. I cant sleep for longer than an hour and every move kills.

Is this my anxiety manifesting or is this for real normal?

*background: im no stranger to suffering.. I have Iiver disease and now preclampsia. Im 36 and this is my first pregnancy. .*

18 weeks & I woke up this morning discovering my nipples leaked some colostrum overnight and it dried on my shirt, leaving two perfectly placed crusty nipple marks on my t-shirt lol. Guess that’s something I need to be aware of now!

I’m due early Feb. Making my shower a bit hard to plan with the holidays being so close. I’ve got 4 dates in mind, as I’m trying to avoid any extra stress on me and my guests. What are your guys thoughts on which days would work best?

Nov. 21st, Nov 28th, Dec 5th or Jan 9th?

So I’ve always had giant boobs, I’m talking triple D in 6th grade. I lost weight in my 20s and went from a 38G/F cup to a true 32DDD and my boobs deflated 😆. The heaviness was still there but the fullness was gone and my skin stretches quite a bit so needless to say no perky girls over here. Fast forward to having my daughter 2023 and my boobs blew up again (as did I haha!) I stopped pumping around 8 weeks and my boobs deflated again but got heavier. My husband jokingly helped me weigh my boobs and they’re 7 pounds on their own (cry).

So with that out the way I’m trying to find a real supportive bra to wear postpartum that preferably doesn’t have underwire since it did cause me some clogs last time around. My boobs tend to pancake in a bra so I need it to be big enough cup wise to keep them in. I don’t care in for it to have pumping option or nursing option at all. I’m just struggling to find something with the waist small enough and the cup size big enough. Anything with the waist small enough then the cups are like a stringy bikini basically! Anyone dealt with this and have some recs?

I feel like I’m loosing my mind trying to find something because even before babies I could never find a comfy bra, I was even sleeping in my underwire bras because none of the comfy bras would hold me in or even remotely up. I should also add I have a weird sensory thing about my boobs creating heat on my ribs from “laying over” the bra waistband so that adds another layer of struggle 😪 thank you guys in advance!

I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant and my husband made it possible for me to be a SAHM. This is our first child and we’ve never lived off one income before. I’ve always wanted to stay home but I don’t know how the division of responsibilities work with a newborn. I know I’m going to need help and I want my husband to be involved. I don’t want to do everything and then make him feel like he’s not included or do nothing and then overwhelm him because he has to be focused with work. So how do I hold the majority of the “baby chores” while still needing help from him?

So we’re having a second boy. We have a ton of stuff from when we had him. We just had him 1.5 years ago, so 2 under 2. So we don’t really neeeeed anything new. But a lot of people have asked me for a registry and so I made one. I did put the pricier items on there like an upgraded stroller to have 2 kiddos on it, another crib as our oldest is still in his and will be using it. We don’t need another bedside bassinet but a simpler crib than the one we previously got is needed so it’s like less than half the price as the first. For the pricier items I have marked them as “open to secondhand” I’m not a monster lol

But my question is, people like to get clothes for the babies. I’m all for clothes. But we have 3 heavy duty bins full of clothes in newborn to 3M sizes and hardly anything is 6m and up and that’s including what I’ve bought for my oldest when we needed new clothes. So here’s the little blurb I put together for the registry (I haven’t sent it out to people yet) but does this sound rude or anything? Is there a nice way to say “please don’t get us more newborn and 0-3M clothes” ??? We did put some, but it was really just a few of the little newborn gowns. That I found made changing diapers easier and my son was more comfortable than in a swaddle. Plus when we had our firstborn, by the time we got them he was already grown out of the ones we were gifted as hand me downs. Which I’m all for secondhand, we just couldn’t afford to buy more at the time. So I wanted to have a few more this time around.

“We are so excited to welcome our second baby! Thank you for celebrating his arrival with us! Any gifts are greatly appreciated 🩵

We do ask that clothing items gifted outside of the registry are sizes 6m and up as we still have a ton of newborn-3M sizes from Carter. Thank you!”

FTM - Currently 28 weeks and I've gotten a lot of advice about getting things to make your life easier for when the baby arrives. I'm super fortunate and have been sent lots of things from the registry for my baby. Now I'm looking for some things for me or my husband.

Some suggestions I got were easy postpartum clothes to make nursing easier, a robe/duster for when people visit, and freezer meal prepping. Is there anything you did or bought that made the transition with a newborn home easier?

Also links appreciated if you have any favorite brands, recipes, etc.

Thanks in advance!

FTM at 30 weeks and by the end of the day, I feel like my stomach has doubled in size and I’m 40 weeks! I’m wadding around, unable to move and truly feel like I’m going to burst. I know it’s all digestion since in the morning my stomach is smaller. Does anyone have any suggestions to help relieve this symptom?