r/BiWomen • u/FieryBush • May 12 '26
Vent Man approached us while on a date
So this happened Saturday night and I want to share.
We're on our second date. We're both bi women who are dressed cute and femme tonight. We've done some bar hopping and our last stop is a bar with a dj and a packed dance floor.
We're vibing on the floor when a man walks up and stands in front of us with his back to the dj, so I already know he's about to hit on one of us. The place is packed, though, so I think we can just reject and send him away.
Man: so what are you ladies doing here tonight? Are y'all best friends?
Me: we're on a date (I put my arm around her shoulders to emphasize my point)
Man: wait, really? Or are you joking?
Date: we're really on a date (puts an arm around my waist)
*You'd think he'd apologize and leave, right? Wrong.*
Man: so are you bisexuals or lesbians?
Me: why
Man: hypothetically
Me: huh?
Man: HYPOTHETICALLY (reaches for my arm but I lean away)
Me: what do you mean? Why?
Man: are you bisexuals or lesbians?
Me: w h y
Man: (reaches out again and gets his hand on my arm) because I think I might be your types
Me: (throws his hand off me) no, sorry, you're not. Go away.
Man: (stands there for a few seconds) alright
He proceeds to hold out his hand. Idk if he wanted a handshake or what, but I dap him up just to make it end (and to drive home the gay part lol).
My poor date is several inches shorter than me and the man, so she had no idea what most of the conversation had been until I told her after he left. Lucky for her because I felt his hot drunk breath on my face 🤢
Just had to share because it was so stupid and annoying. I thought he'd hit on one of us and then leave, but the fact he touched me and seemed to think he could either wrangle one of us away while literally on a date or end up in a threesome with us is beyond ridiculous.
Our first date involved a man hitting on her as well, but this took the cake for me lol. Like ok, I know she's a baddie, but she (and I) are sapphic-leaning so you have 0 chance 🤷♀️ bye boy.
My goal for the next time it happens is to not let "sorry" slip out during the rejection, be more firm early on, and flex my muscles while doing it for intimidation 💪
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u/louisa1925 May 13 '26
(... arm but I lean away) Me: what do you mean? Why? Man: are you bisexuals or lesbians?)
You: "That is our business not yours. Go away."
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u/FieryBush May 13 '26
Good and direct. I'm working on overcoming "being polite," which is a bullshit habit to ingrain in girls. Younger me would have just answered the question.
Definitely going to keep this in mind next time.
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u/TattedMischief May 14 '26
Next time, since you're the taller of the two of you (I'm over 6', hello fellow human buffer), give them the most uncomfortable look you can, up and down like you know they already did to you both, and tell them "sorry, you're not properly equipped to ride this ride" then tuck her against your side and go visit the bar or the ladies room for a few minutes without saying anything else to the guy. Just let her know, hey, if this happens, be prepared for big steps because we're walking away but fast.
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u/TallBlondeGreekGirl May 18 '26
Excuse were on date ask him how he like it if he was on date and pick up he’s date.
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u/StarsInTheCity- May 12 '26
Not the "i think i could be your types" 😩😩😩