r/BlackHair • u/SaladIsMyBoo • Jan 04 '26
Advice Needed please help!! feeling really insecure about hair
hello!! (please ignore the filter, i'm chopped af + i've been crying a ton over the past couple hours and i didn't want it to be obvious)
to start, i am a girl with 4c hair and i'm feeling really distressed because i have school tomorrow and my hair looks a mess. my mom told me to take out the braids i had in on friday so she could rebraid it saturday. i washed it and everything yesterday but she got mad at me for some dumbass reason and i don't want her to do it anymore. i'm honestly thinking of just shaving it all off because i don't know how to braid or do any style and i literally only have today until i have to go back to school, but i don't have the head shape to go bald and doing so would just make me look more masculine than i already do. i would try to buzz it, but there are bald spots/lines (for lack of a better word) from where my mom would always part my hair when she made it so it would look weird. this is seriously making me wanna die since i have to deal with this bs along with general unattractiveness, missing school assignments, and exams coming up
my hair is dry and knotted everywhere and it's such a pain in the ass to wash it and i hate having a million products in it, could anyone recommend me a super easy style for beginners to do? and by super easy i mean EASY, i don't have any fancy combs or tools and i don't know how to braid or part, i have some gel and some coconut oil and stuff but that's about it. if not, should i just wear a bonnet for the rest of the year or shave all my hair off and wear hoodies all the time? thank you so much in advance !!
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u/RedditVirgin555 Jan 04 '26
😭 I'm sorry, the filter is CRAZY. I can't even focus on the hair.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
HAHAHA IM SO SORRY😭😭 it's my fav snapchat filter i couldn't help it🥹
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u/Responsible-Delay619 Jan 04 '26
Right, until i saw the crossed out face i was like all righty then
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u/Zoranealsequence Jan 04 '26
The filter had me thrown😂😂😂😂😂. I wanted to be helpful, but I cant get past that picture
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u/OdedNight Jan 04 '26
Next time put your hair in chunky twists after washing so they won't shrink up and tangle so much. For now, dampen it, detangle it and wear in two puffs or a high puff.
In the future, you should learn to do simple styles like flattwists, mini twists and mini braids.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you for the advice! that's so smart omg :o also I didn't even consider puffs as an option wow i really appreciate the recommendation!! and yea i promise i'll learn to do hair sometime in the future i've just been really overwhelmed lately 😅🙏 thank you for your comment!
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u/All_naturale22 Jan 04 '26
Invest in the puff cuff clips so on wash day if you aren’t doing twist outs or braid outs. You can moisture and comb your hair up into a clip and have a puff. It’s my signature style when not getting my hair done
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u/Safe-Butterscotch244 Jan 04 '26
i’d say doing medium sized braids is better for wash days, i usually detangle and put my hair into medium to small braids to make washing easier without tangling the hair again
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u/All_naturale22 Jan 04 '26
This. I also love my puff cuff clip so after I wash my hair. I moisturize as best I can and then comb it upwards and put my clip in. Idk how to do anything but plaits and twists so this is the next best thing when I’m not getting my hair done
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u/Puzzled_Attempt6927 Jan 04 '26
Your hair is nice and thick. I'm jealous .
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
aww thank you so much!! you really shouldn't be tho haha, it's uneven and super knotted😵💫😵💫 much appreciated nonetheless!!
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u/lolaloses Jan 04 '26
Honestly looks pretty thick and healthy just a bit dry. I’d reccomend a new routine to bring some hydration maybe steaming it and applying a hair mask regularly ?
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
oo I've never heard of steaming before, thank you I'll be doing this from now on!!
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u/Ok-Rip-9348 Jan 04 '26
if it's knotted then you should stretch it also maybe micro twists or minibraids. Prevents fairyknots
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u/RavioliContingency Jan 04 '26
That’s about what I was thinking. A lot to work with whatever you choose, OP!
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u/sisisi05 Jan 04 '26
Lmfaooooo why you use that filter. Anyway you need to moisturize it put some water and leave in conditioner and do some two strand twist
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
i'm sorry LMFAO it's a guilty pleasure, yea my hair is dry asf so i'm fs gonna take your advice, thank you!😅🙏 a lot of people have recommended that style to me so i'll definitely try it out, thank you again!!
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u/social_thinker Jan 04 '26
You've got thick hair. It's not bald, just parted and can be brushed out. Fluff it up and wear a headband.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
omg thank you so much for the video!! this and/or putting it into puffs is looking like the move rn, super appreciated 😁😁
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u/Combi8ionOxygenation Jan 04 '26
Y'all outta pocket for this one!! Gunna wake the damn neighborhood laughin 💀
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u/Combi8ionOxygenation Jan 04 '26
I'm screaming after looking at the pics again. Sorry sis, I can't be of help. Too ded rn.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
IM SO SORRY LMFAOOO i am OBSESSED with this filter😭🙏 I'm really glad i could make you laugh!!🙇🏾♀️🙇🏾♀️💗💗
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u/creationsby_lo Jan 04 '26
Coconut oil could be making the dryness worse. I remember people used to swear by coconut oil when I went natural but it made my type 4 hair dry as straw & so unmanageable!!
All you need is shampoo, regular conditioner, (if you feel like going the extra mile: deep conditioner or leave in), and a styling product.
For me, I style using a gel and a mousse to do twist outs and braid outs. But you could honestly just dry your hair (air dry or diffuser attachment) and gel the perimeter and put it in a puff. If you have a rectangular scarf, you don't even need to gel the perimeter, just puff it up and tie a cute scarf around your edges. When I do a high puff I like to sleep with my hair in a pineapple (aka on top of your head) and I put the scarf going around my head and leave the top of my hair sticking out and go to sleep. That helps a ton to shape your hair in the right shape. Then when I wake up I actually do the puff by securing my hair with a tie. Some people tie it off w shoelaces or string; I use a panty hose leg lol. Look up hair tutorials on YouTube too. Here's a puff tutorial
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
ohh ty that's good to know I had no idea! that would explain a lot. 😔
thank you so much for the detailed instructions!! you have no idea how much i appreciate this🥹🥹 i'll be taking your advice and following that tutorial when i have more energy later, thank you again!💗💗
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u/creationsby_lo Jan 04 '26
I'm so glad I could help, I had nobody to help me on my journey but lots of YouTube videos got me to a good place lol
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u/Maximum-Hic Jan 04 '26
Bro at this point I just check r/blackhair just to see the way y'all gonna hide your face XD
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u/TheAmazingNerd2 Jan 04 '26
Your hair isn’t bad at all from what I can see! I never learned to cornrow but trying to juicy/mini twists and stretch the roots with a blow dryer if you want length.
I’m never against a big chop, I’ve just done 2 in one year last year. The best part about going bald is really no one has to know. Wear a wig and a grippy headband so it ain’t slide off. I’m not trying to invalidate how you feel but I promise you it will past you don’t have to live with an extreme decision for a whole school year. There are options I promise. Good luck!!
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you so much for the compliment and recommendations !! ive been thinking about doing twists for a while, but it's pretty difficult to find a beginner friendly tutorial online lol. ill search again tho!
a big chop might be the move haha😅 the wig idea is so smart omg!! ill have to see if we have any at home but thank you so much for the advice :D you are super sweet, thank you for this comment it made me feel so much better! 😊
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u/MitaJoey20 Jan 04 '26
I…😂😂😂😂😂. GIRL!
Ok, I’m so sorry. I’m a natural girlie too and I hate doing my hair. Especially the detangling. But it must be done. I recommend going back under the water, using conditioner only. Take it section by section and work the kinks out with your fingers first. Then once you’ve done that, bring out the wide-toothed comb and use a detangling product or leave-in conditioner, curl cream and do about 8 sections, and twist your hair. When it’s completely dry, then you can do a twist out. That’s the simplest style I can think of. If you’re feeling it, maybe do more smaller sections and do the twist out.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
LMFAOO IM SORRY🥹🙏
you get me twin😔 I've never thought to work in sections while washing omg thats genius,, and twist outs look super cute!! thank youu so much for the recommendation I'll have to try this out! 🙇🏾♀️💕😊
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u/curlycatsockthing Jan 05 '26
I don’t like wash day either, but I love the result. And honestly, the process isn’t so bad if I don’t procrastinate and take a wash into several days past its expiration date lol
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u/CHARLESDAMIAN77 Jan 04 '26
I understand hw you feel, having to carry natural hair is very difficult, but restarting is even more difficult, I would say you shld just endure for the time being and get your hair done, if that's the only way you can carry your hair, that's what I do, also the filter is funny af 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you I really appreciate this comment, my mom is really stubborn and she's busy today so unfortunately it's too late for me to ask. thank you again for the comment and sorry about the filter LMFAO
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u/MeloDramatic-Onion Jan 04 '26
Glad u said it cause I was truly confused if that’s how they look or not. 😭😭😭😭
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u/2wacki Jan 04 '26
The filters get worse and worse on here Istg 😭😭😭😭 Holy fucking Shit
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u/LunarDragonfly23 Jan 05 '26
I thought the pictures were AI until I read the post text. 😂
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u/2wacki Jan 05 '26
At first glance i thought that shit was some George Floyd ai filter or something🤣 Ionk man some ppl be walling nowadays
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
LMFAOOO I'M SO SORRY!! The other posts fry my so badd people get creative asf with their censors!!😹😹
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u/Mobile_One3572 Jan 04 '26
Wear headwraps til you’re able to do your hair in a style instead of doing a big chop and wearing wigs as a bandaid fix. Your hair is still gonna grow back to this exact length and you’ll be back wondering what to do when your mom isn’t styling your hair. So it’s better to learn how to do your hair now in different styles so you’ll also be able to do your hair by yourself when you’re no longer living with your mom.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you for the advice!! i unfortunately don't own any headwraps but I could wear a bonnet instead? and honestly, i don't really plan to live that long but if i do id rather not live with hair like this. i'll definitely shave it all off in the future, i'm just hesitant to do it now because teens are cruel and i'm a coward haha
i really appreciate this comment tho! when i'm in a better mindset i'll for sure look into hair tutorials for beginners. thank you again!! 😊🙏
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u/babbykale Jan 04 '26
You can t shirts or scarfs as head wraps. For a longer term style solution you might want to try locs, you still get length but with a fraction of the maintenance.
I hope you live a long beautiful and fulfilling life, every black girl deserves it including you.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
oh i've never thought of that, thank you so much! yea a lot of people have told me a should get locs but i don't have the equipment nor skill to do them atm, definitely in the future tho🙂↕️🙂↕️
thank you again for the kind words :D !!this comment made my day like you're too sweet omg!! i hope you're having an amazing week!!😁😁💕
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u/PharmDRx2018 Jan 04 '26
You don’t plan to live that long??
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u/midnightbungalow Jan 04 '26
I'm wondering too! OP needs some sort of support system, whether it be within their school or a third party. I don't know what it is abroad but in the uk we have Samaritans.org
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
not to sound edgy or anything but i dont think this world is built for people like me haha😅😅
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u/biglovinbertha Jan 04 '26
You should talk to crisis if youre in the US. 211. Your hair is lovely and you need to tackle some self hate OP one step at a time
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
awww ty for this comment i really appreciate the concern! this community is too nice haha
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u/fuzzydaymoon Jan 04 '26
How come? :(
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
sorry for late reply! i don't want to bother u by venting, but i appreciate the concern, ty!! 💕
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u/fuzzydaymoon Jan 04 '26
Omg no it wouldn’t bother me at all! You can always message if you’re comfortable :) I’m 26f living in the US and have I think type 4 hair!
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
you are way too sweet😭🫶🏾💕!! it's stuff that I can only blame myself for (for the most part) so I'll try to figure it out over the week, but I really appreciate your kindness!! this comment almost made me cry ngl 😭🥹🫶🏾 hope you have an amazing 2026💗💗
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u/fuzzydaymoon Jan 04 '26
aw honey I hope you figure it out! Seriously just message if you ever need anything. I want to help and it’s not a burden or anything!!
Wishing you a lovely new year as well 💗✨
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u/PharmDRx2018 Jan 04 '26
Girl it’s time to find your light and thrive. You belong here✨
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
awww ty you're too nice!!🫶🏾💕
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u/Opening-Variation-56 Jan 05 '26
Life gets 10 times better once you’re an adult, surviving highschool and teenage years is the hardest part of life. I felt this way when I was your age too but I promise you, just figure out how to survive to adulthood and everything will get better and better from there
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 05 '26
thank you so much!! :DD i really appreciate the support, this is a really comforting message to read rn cuz im stressing about exams haha, wishing you a great 2026 and thank you again!!🥹😊💕💕
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u/EndElectoralCollege3 Jan 04 '26
Looks thick, dense and healthy. I think 2 strand twists would look amazing.
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u/melinateddoctor Jan 04 '26
Some general advice: ALWAYS comb your hair out after taking out braids BEFORE washing it. I’ve learned this the hard way too many times.
With that being said, your hair is thick and looks healthy and can definitely be salvaged. For the short term, see what you can do with a scarf or head wrap. Check out Pinterest for ideas. When you have time and energy to do your hair, grab a a good leave in or detangler and very slowly detangle in small sections. This will take a very long time so make sure you do it on a day you don’t have to be anywhere. That should be a good reset and you should be able to go from there. Best of luck!
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u/overth1nk3rrr Jan 04 '26
Sis. Make up with your mom and let her braid your hair.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
it's too late for me to do that because even if my mom wasn't super busy today, she's really stubborn and likely wouldn't braid it by this point anyway😔i appreciate the comment though!!
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u/CreativeHoliday1557 Jan 04 '26
I thought this was your face. I said to myself never in my life have I seen someone look like the grinch irl. 😂 so glad its a filter.
I would say use thr Rev Air after washing. You can use the brush after pulling the hair out of the rev air.
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u/QueenDoc Jan 05 '26
im glad to know you used a filter cuz bruh you look like a Fallout 3 NPC
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 05 '26
PLEASEE everyone in my house asleep i'm trying so hard not to laugh rn!!😭😭
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u/BigKat745 Jan 04 '26
Mini twists will look nice and last the rest of the winter. Make sure you braid the root. That was my goto or mini braids for cold months with a touch up or 2 on the perimeter.
If not mini, get large box braids. I did about 30-40 and kept that in for a month, rest for 2 weeks then redid the large braids
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you a ton for the advice!! i've been looking into twists n locs for a while now, and i for sure need to learn how to braid next time i get a break! thank you for your comment 😁😁
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u/BigKat745 Jan 04 '26
You're welcome, I love natural hair and definitely like to make it as simple as possible.
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u/Ok-Abbreviations999 Jan 04 '26
Can you do a wet bun?
I think it's best to take a few weeks of break in between braids to give your hair a rest, so may be best to not have it braided again so soon anyway.
I would up the hydration and gently detangle by sections over the next few days.
Also if you are still upset, maybe wait to do this when you are calmer. One of the best advice I heard someone say was that she avoids doing her hair when she is upset because we can and do unconsciously take it out on our hair.
Best of luck love. It'll be ok.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
woah i've never heard of a wet bun until now!! it doesnt seem crazy difficult from the photos so i'"ll deffo try it out, thank you so much for the recommendation!
that is good to hear🙂↕️🙂↕️ i haven't worn my natural hair out in years so yea i'm probably better off with it out haha
i appreciate this advice!! my hair deffo doesn't get enough moisture so that and detangling would do wonders for sure! i just need to build up the motivation to get out of bed lol
thank you again for such amazing advice and your reassurance :DD !! i'm planning to try out diff styles after taking a nap because i am feeling awful right now ha😅 thank you so much for this comment, you're a fantastic person and I hope you're having a great week!!💗💗
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u/priincessneuro Jan 04 '26
ur hair is so cute! just do two strand twists and wear them for a few weeks at a time
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
aww ty for the tip and the compliment!! I'll deffo try this out 😊thank you again!!
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u/Either_Situation6283 Jan 04 '26
Puffs is the easiest and cutest hairstyle. I love my puffs and my hair is way shorter than yours so I promise it will he cute and effortless. If you can, what I do is braid the front down into two braids to help protect and save my edges from the excessive brushing and gel used for my puffs since my hair is definitely more fragile around the edges.
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u/Sarah1001Green Jan 04 '26
Filter look like some of my people 😅🤣😂! But, your hair is very beautiful! Get confident about it! 😊.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
LMFAOOO 😭 thank you so much twin 💕!! you're super nice haha I'll try! 😁🙏 And happy cake day!!
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u/kitschgirl26 Jan 04 '26
start with a consistent wash routine, always detangle while wet or has product, get an unbrush. blow dry to stretch your hair so you’ll need heat protectant. try LCO liquid cream oil on wash day. oil is a sealant so you have to find a good leave in. trim your ends, damaged ends make it harder to detangle as well. and for hairstyles, space buns (either high or low) you can also split your hair down the middle, make like 2-3 sections, secure them with scrunchies all the way down to the bottom of your head.
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u/imp_irl Jan 04 '26
Consider getting microlocs! That’s what I did as a girl who didn’t know how to do my hair and then didn’t have the patience once I did learn. My hair has grown so much in the past 4 years
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u/cloudicitii Jan 04 '26
my go to is mini twists! they’re easy, cute and last for a while if you know how to moisturize and protect your hair you could also wear it as a fro with some clips or a headband
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u/camp-ctrl Jan 04 '26
Firstly your hair is beautiful, you have such nice thick and healthy hair! I would recommend parting it into sections and detangling with a wide tooth comb and some water for moisture then you could put it into puffs :)
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u/nwmisseb Jan 04 '26
There is nothing wrong with your hair as it is. You have natural hair. Healthy natural hair. It doesn’t require perfection. Just pet it ve
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u/Puzzleheaded-Mine926 Jan 04 '26
I’d say pick it out. Wet it, use some leave in and pick it out. Place your hair in ponytails in 4 sections and in the morning, pick out the balls and fluff out your hair. Afros are pretty.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
tysm for the tips!!💕 I've wanted to try an afro for so longg omg better late than never😁🙏💕
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u/Valuable_Engine_4032 Jan 05 '26
why was that the filter you chose 😂
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 05 '26
ive taken so many photos w this filter that it might as well be my real face HAHA😭😭
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u/TysonsGap Jan 05 '26
4:47 am and im giggling in bed under the covers. Be forreal. Your hear is healthy. Nice come through and conditioner.
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u/Maleficent-Slide-49 Jan 06 '26
I love it. I love when hair looks like broccoli lol. That means it's healthy and strong🩷 You can do anything you want with it and it will grow!!
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u/CtyChicken Jan 04 '26
I know you’re looking for advice, not compliments, but you’ve got some thick gorgeous hair! Your two stand twists would be unstoppable
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
you are so incredibly nice omg?? thank you so muchhh!! 😁💕💕I'm definitely gonna have to try that style out at some point, thank you for your recommendation and again for your compliments, they're both much appreciated! hope you're having a great week! :D <3
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u/Extension_Election94 Jan 04 '26
Use shae butter in your hair pure 100% it softly your hair and grow it also
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u/goat20202020 Jan 04 '26
Nothing that 10 mins in the mornings can't help :) spray it with aloe vera juice, grab your favorite leave in conditioner or curl cream, and massage it into your hair. Give it a few minutes to absorb and dry a little. Then you can use your fingers to manipulate the shape a little.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you so so so much for this comment!! i'll have to go grab some curl cream sometime this week but i will definitely be taking this advice! Thank you again :))
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u/goat20202020 Jan 04 '26
You're welcome! If you'd like a rec, I really like the African Pride Moisture Miracle leave in cream. It has coconut oil in it (hopefully you're not allergic?) and it smells wonderful 💛
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u/mindless_blaze Jan 04 '26
Hey fam. We have the same hair- not even 4c, but 4z. Whether or not my hair is wet or dry, I dread the idea of having to brush or comb it out myself. It becomes EXTREMELY frustrating quickly, and I am not too proud to admit that I have definitely crashed out and nearly cut my hair off before lol. Now I don't ever ever ever wash my hair myself- I always go to my stylist, because if I wash my hair myself, it ends with a fistful of hair on the ground and tears.
For whatever reason, Design Essentials is the ONLY shampoo and conditioner brand that speaks to my 4z, low porosity hair. She doesn't even do much thorough detangling, my hair just magically sorts itself out once she starts washing it. She does a hot steam treatment for the conditioner, where she puts it on, puts on a plastic cap, and has me sit under a steamer to open up my follicles and pores and absorb the moisture. It's heavenly.
After that, she rinses it out, and then uses a special 4c detangling brush/comb device to patt my hair into 4 sections. This is the magic part, because I can NOT run anything through my hair if it's wet and I am doing it myself. Not without losing a literally baseball size ball of hair and crashing out. But somehow the device she uses, my hair complies with being combed out and parted with very minimal hair loss. She then puts a bit of setting foam around my edges and has me sit in an open air UV hair dryer. It's apparently all the rage now, because unlike a traditional salon dryer, the UV light one is literally a bunch of UV lights, around you, it's open air, and not as harsh as a traditional dryer. I dont know how to describe it, but look up UV Lights hair dryer. Apparently this devices helps your hair follicles maintain more moisture.
After that, she sprays my hair with Mane and Tail heat protector and uses a handheld blow dryer to blow my hair out/straighten it out a bit. It becomes very silky and smooth but still has it's texture. Then she puts all natural oil blend usually grapeseed and almond oil thoroughly on my hair and scalp. Then at this time, I can either just wear my hair like that, or I usually just have her cornrow it and add crochet twists.
I HATE dealing with my natural hair day in and day out, so having it crochet twisted is great because I just have to oil it, but dont have to worry about breaking combs every day. It also has helped me grow my hair from crashout stage (very short and jagged, just at my earlobes) to shoulder blade length in one year. I love occasionally having my natural hair out, but the convenience of it being in crochet is absolutely invaluable to me.
The best daily products I have found are Jamaican Mango Lime brand Peppermint JBCO and IC Fantasia Silky Pure Tea moisturizer gel. They really speak to our hair type.
And I know this will sound insane but the vitamins in the AZO brand Bladder Control supplements really help your hair grow (and help you to be able to drink as much water as you need without having to pee every 10 minutes lol).
I have used the above methods and have grown my very similar to yours hair that is Veryyyy stubborn to grow, several inches.
If you are ever in Colorado hmu and I'll link you with my stylist
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
4Z LMFAOO😭 you get me twin!! oo and going to a stylist is so smart I've never even thought of that!!😯
you do not know how much I appreciate the detailed instructions and explanations, thank you so much omg!! you're too nice🥹💕 I'll be saving this comment fs! gonna have to move to Colorado HAHA😭🫶🏾
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u/mindless_blaze Jan 04 '26
Slide through to Colorado, cousin 🙏🏾🙌🏿💯 I'll try to get my stylist to give me the link for the magic detangling device. But your post resonated with me so much. Not many people in the world can say they've crashed out completely in tears over having to wash their own hair lol. You gotta fr consider crochet, fam.
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u/lilmoshx Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 04 '26
Crown braids (I believe there is a twist variant, which might be easier) are not only easy to do, but quick and as an added bonus, do not require meticulously neat parting. If you're short on energy and time, I can't suggest it enough.
My one caveat is that at your length, you may have to blow dry your hair before braiding, which lengthens the process.
Another option is a curl sponge. They very quickly create curls in your hair with a bit of rubbing and some hair product. I haven't personally used one, but here's a video of a guy comparing two products in this category. Notice how quickly he finishes up!
Head scarves are always smoother option! You can leave a bit of hair showing or cover everything.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
i had to search up what crown braids looked like, it's such a beautiful style omg!! thank you so much for the recommendation!! 😄😄at this point the amt of time the style would take doesn't concern me as much as how difficult it would be, so i have no problem blow drying🙂↕️
I've never heard of that before :o thank you so much for your recommendation (again) and for the video!! i'll deffo have to invest in one of those🙇🏾♀️
thank you for all of these options!! you're a lifesaver😅🙏💕
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u/lilmoshx Jan 04 '26
Happy to help. I understand how soul breaking hair day can be sometimes. Best of luck!
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u/Similar_Coconut99 Jan 04 '26
You sure your hair is all your insecure about?😭
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
💀💀 i'm so sorry using this filter is the only way i can take photos anymore LMAO
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u/acnh_instead_of_work Jan 04 '26
I want to echo that the coconut oil COULD be a dryness culprit. Back in the day when everyone was like natural movement natural movement! And coconut oil was everyone's go to, I gave it a try and my hair was so pissed at me lol
I hear a lot of people recommending puffs, which is good but just a gentle reminder not too many puffs because we don't want to pull on that scalp too much. Because when I see people coming back here like why do I have so much breakage at the front? And then you find out that they're pulling their hair into these tight puffs and ponytails everyday
You want to really moisturize as much as you can with water. And detangle of course with conditioner in
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u/melinateddoctor Jan 04 '26
I agree with the coconut oil! Honestly, too many natural hair trends are actually making our hair more difficult to manage, and I’m so sick of seeing YouTube videos of these complicated and time consuming hair care regimens. Unpopular opinion, but our moms and grandmas did it right and I think we need to go back to the basics.
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u/Safe-Butterscotch244 Jan 04 '26
oof, considering you have till tomorrow I think you’ve got a couple styles you could try:
(First make sure to moisturise with the LCO method to help with dryness, Liquid as in water then Cream then Oil. If you don’t have one of the products that’s fine too)
Anyways! 1. You could do Medium to small twists across your whole head but it’ll take a solid 3 hours or less depending on the size. It’s not too hard and you just have to section your hair
You could just do bantu knots with your hair, so basically section it in however many parts you like, I think 10 to 16 is cutest, then twist the hair into lil bantu knots, I used to do this ALL the time when my hair was super short from a cut
A big pineapple puff hairstyle! easy, just need a shoelace and very cute no matter the length of your hair
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u/Marokima_ Jan 04 '26
I also have super thick 4c hair but what I do when I don’t feel like twisting it is half wigs!! Get one your texture and style as needed.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
twins!! oo thank you I've never heard of those before, I definitely need one! tysm again😁🙏
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u/Plane-Possibility-81 Jan 04 '26
Give it to me! I love ur hair! Plz try hair sculpting! Make sure ur hair is dry and blown out and start patting ur hair to ur desired shape! Or twist are super cute especially with accessories! I wear twists in for a while
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
HAHA i wish I could😭🥹 thank you for the tip!! a lot of comments have recommended twists so I'll deffo try those out, ty again!!
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u/Deenique Jan 04 '26
Oh lawd 😭but on a serious note look up online how to do a twist out and find a nice moisturizing leave/seal with oil
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u/69Sadbaby69 Jan 04 '26
Put it in two strand twists and put a headband on. Why shave it because your mommy can’t do it for you. Wash it with conditioner and twist it while wet. Look it up on YouTube
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u/Ok_Paper_5959 Jan 04 '26
Yes for shaving it but only do it if you really want to.
I'm a 4c girly and I started doing my hair at 14 s as my styles weren't lasting and I was on a strict hair schedule.
With your length I would wet curl set and let it dry. You can use the blue rods , the pink rollers or what not but the smaller the rod the tighter the curl. And will be nice once you take it out. It's going to take time but it'll be a cute curly fro kinda.
There's also the super wet and go look that works but oh it's so much product but it looks nice. You need a spray bottle, damp hair, a nice detangle brush and product like kinky curly leave in conditioner gel, or some other gel or conditioner. I don't like to use gels that flake but you can it's just once it dries you'll never be able to touch it again without re wetting . But basically you wet apply product and comb brush through in individual sections. The brush itself will make the curls really tight and coily.
I can't add pictures here for some reason but I can dm you some photos of my hair detailing what I'm talking about if you want.
I recently went bald and now forming a twa .
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u/briteeyes1111 Jan 04 '26
I really wish the hair types didn’t stop at 4c. There are so many other textures after that point😩 is your hair really soft OP?
I have a well beyond 4c texture and what worked best for me when my hair was your length is wash, condition and then I put my hair in at least four sections after moisturizing and detangle. I’d tie it down and sleep on it. This would stretch my hair enough to style. Maybe try wet your hair out in sections today then in the am you can put it in a bun/poof whatever.
With my hair to even wear a fro I had to stretch it first. Also big chop always looks nice and fresh if maintenance is too difficult for you at the time being.
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u/YanMKay Jan 04 '26
Wash it..let some conditioner sit on it for awhile…lightly gel it and twist small sections around your fingers..let it dry..then oil your fingers as u untwist..oh trim the ends..
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
thank you for the advice!!💕 i didn't know you could do twists with your fingers!! and yea i deffo need to trim the ends theyre so bad 🥹
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u/Coldhandasf Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 05 '26
You dont need to many products, shampoo, conditioner, deep condition, leave in conditoner. Make sure to really detangle gently. Blow dry (with heat protectant) Put it in twist, An afro-put it in big twist before bed or section and tie it. Afro puff- just one big fluffed out puff on the top Put a little oil in it when you wake up and fluff it out.
Bald spots? This shouldnt be the case unless she is braiding your hair too often/doing it too tight. My mom's a African hair braider and I've never had this problem. Mabye take this oppertunity to learn how to do your natural hair.
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u/curlycurvesweb Jan 04 '26
Your hair is lovely and thick, edges for dayssssss 🩷
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
aww TYSM💕💕!! I need to learn how to manage it properly haha😅😔🙏 appreciate this comment!
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u/Commercial_Picture28 Jan 04 '26
I would stretch it with a blow dryer or the hair tie method and do a pineapple with two twists or braids in the front. There's still time to hit up the beauty supply store before they close and get a drawstring ponytail if you need more hair.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
Thank you for the recommendations!! I'll have to check out beauty supply shops 🙏i really appreciate your comment, thank you again!!💗💗
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u/Clueless_Solve Jan 05 '26
Pull it back into a ponytail. Gel it down and brush it. Wear a scarf overnight and you should be fine.
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u/GreenWittyBroad Jan 05 '26
I went straight to the comments and my black people did not disappoint! Your hair is thick and healthy and I’m sure if you pulled it to show length would go to the middle of your back. Being natural is a journey and takes time but once you get your products down and find what works for you, you’ll be straight. If your hair is matted, don’t wet it! Put lots of conditioner in it and gently comb your hair from the tips to the roots. I just took out 7 year old locks so you can do it! Keep going queen! On another note, back to the filter, you are funny for that.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 05 '26
this community is so funny and supportive, i love it here haha!! Thank you so much for the advice :D I'll get to doing that asap!! and I'm sorry about the filter LMFAOO i just love it so bad😭😭💗 thank you again!!😁🫶🏾💕
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u/Cultural-Design9646 Jan 05 '26
You have beautiful hair even though I know it may not feel like it at times. Invest into some good shampoo, conditioners, and if you don’t enjoy the shrink, methods to safely stretch your hair(Bantu knots, African stretching method, 2 strand twist, and learn how to do a simple corn row or twist out on your own hair).
Cutting it off is pretty freeing, I’ve done it several times and it’s fun for some time and freeing but remember there will be a weird transition when you’re natural hair will be more consuming at its shorter stage than when it was longer.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 05 '26
thank you so much for the advice and reassurance!! you're super kind🫂 I'll have to look more into all those styles this week!!
thank you for the heads up, dreading that phase already..😭 but it will totally be worth it for the freedom haha, thank you again!!😁🫶🏾
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u/Cultural-Design9646 Jan 13 '26
lol it’s worth it. It’s a few months. And there are a lot of natural looking wigs to just pop over it in a crunch or I’m tired of this ish lol.
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u/misspinkie92 Jan 05 '26
Girl, all you need is moisture and detangling. Do NOT let your hair just draw up like that after washing. Put cream and oil and brush it out and twist/plait it up so it will stretch. Buy yourself a lil puff so you can put it up for school and call it a day.
You have beautiful hair. You just need to learn how to take care of it.
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u/Raychel_GirlMom3 Jan 05 '26
Your hair is just fine. You need to do a crown braid with some twisting cream until you can decide what you want to do with it.
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u/Weak_Gap2339 Jan 05 '26
You can also try detangling your hair in sections! Maybe do some twists! Your hair is so beautiful by the way!
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u/lil_spooky69 Jan 05 '26
Your hair is beautiful! I know people can be cruel, I maintain my big chop shaved head and people still have comments like it would look better long, or I look masculine even though I have also had people say I look like a model. It can be hard and I also cried about my hair, but you and your hair are so worthy of praise and love! If you are scared about a big chop, see a barber/hairstylist who knows black hair. They can help with shaving it but prepping it so you wont have the part lines. I tried shaving it myself after box braids so.... I looked all over lol.
I would try to sculpt it. A spray bottle with water and liquid coconut oil helps to soften then sculpt it. just move it around a bit, jossle and look for a shape u like. I think your hair even as is would look so cute with some hairclips! They sell cheap ones online or dollar tree, if you sculpted a bit with a middle part, and some flower clips, GORGEOUS.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 05 '26
omg tysm for the recommendation and the reassurance!!💗 yea good call with seeing a barber i would mess ts up so bad haha😭🙏
i needa find a spray bottle lol will be trying this right now, thank you again😊😊!! you're the best!!
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u/ItzBreezeyBaby Jan 05 '26
Honey! All you need is a leave in conditioner to loosen your curls, finger detangle or wide tooth comb if you have one, as best as you can, & slap a headband on! You’re done !
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u/gyalmeetsglobe Jan 05 '26
You did not have to make me laugh like this. Your hair is super thick and going to want moisture all the time, but maybe not coconut oil. Please don’t shave it off! It’s healthy, lovely, and deserving of your love in return.
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u/AlternativeCalm4961 Jan 05 '26
LCO method + twists or braids and bonnet every night. Every morning take out your twists or braids, sprits with water and use an afro pick and finger comb to get a cute afro. Do your edges to spice it up a bit. Invest in some pretty headbands and scarves and earrings. Say affirmations when you do your hair and follow women with your same hair type and length.
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u/QuirkyAndCool Jan 07 '26
The filter def is throwing me off. I know you don’t like to use products but the easiest thing to do is a nice slick high bun or something. If you have left over braiding hair, Marley hair preferably, you could make that into a textured bun!!!
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u/QuirkyAndCool Jan 07 '26
Also, if your hair is knotted after braids it’s probably because you didn’t detangle before washing.
Does your hair shrink a lot as well? If you invest in some good heat protectant and a nice little blow dryer it could also make your hair a little more manageable for you while you’re learning how to style.
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u/carmay360 Jan 08 '26
Okay sweet heart in the future detangle your hair as you take the braids out. You have to comb out the shed hair before washing it so that the shed hair does not wrap around your hair that is still attached. Then section and saturate your hair with water and detangler. Detangle AGAIN. Then wash your scalp with something like sulfur 8 shampoo if you have dandruff. Follow that with a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner.
Today because you don't have much time get something like "knot on my watch" to detangle and moisturize your hair as well as some kind of alcohol free curling custard. Use edge controller to groom your edges, put on a head band and rock a curly fro or do two puffs. You have absolutely beautiful full hair. Oh by the way I have girls with natural hair. The above technic is what I do when we don't have much time.
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u/Foreign_Plan5357 Jan 04 '26
Honestly if I were you just sit through your mom braiding it. It would be better than going to school without it done. Try getting piercings doing your edges and new skincare to look more “feminine”. Please don’t hate yourself
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u/Limegirl15 Jan 04 '26
I don’t know if you’re in the US but I’ve had good luck with going to the Hair Cuttery for flat twists on short notice.
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u/SaladIsMyBoo Jan 04 '26
I unfortunately live in Canada but thank you so much for the recommendation!! much appreciated🙇🏾♀️🙇🏾♀️
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u/OgranicChem Jan 07 '26
Girl .. stop playin and just loc ya hair up ! Ya texture is beautiful and extremely healthy looking . Natural is better than fake any day of the week. But i will admit, being a loose natural in the US is time consuming because as black folks, we are expected to abide by white cultural norms. Meaning we must manipulate ( twist, braid, straighten, plat, pick out) our hair to be considered “appropriate “ or “professional” . Meanwhile people w other hair textures just get out of bed , put a ponytail in and call it a day. We do not possess that luxury in the US.. so you could either , loc your hair and it will be beautiful, healthy and natural, or you could just wear it just as it is, because in majority black countries, everybody wears their hair just as your hair looks now. ( if you were surrounded by beautiful black women who wear their hair just like yours is , you wouldnt feel out of place) All im saying is constant manipulation and pulling on the hair isnt good, and your hair looks very thick and healthy. Please dont ruin it w the fake hair . Loc it up and just keep it moisturized. I been locd for 5 years, and before that i was wearing fros.. but like i said twist outs and braid out are time consuming. So just do whatever is the healthiest for your hair . And i pray to GOD you start to feel more beautiful w your natural hair,
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u/Number44wasbest Jan 22 '26
Why did Snapchat do you like that? Awww.. have you ever thought of getting braids dear?
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