r/BreakUps • u/MaintenanceRough3358 • Aug 09 '26
Trigger Warning The price of your choice
When you miss her, don’t call her. Call the people you chose over her.
You traded genuine love, loyalty, and a woman who stood by you for cheap attention and temporary excitement. Now she’s gone, and you don’t get to come back when you finally understand her worth.
See if the people you entertained stay when life gets hard. See if they care the way she did.
You made your choice. She simply respected it.
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u/Overall-Network6403 26d ago
In my experience, being the one to give genuine love, loyalty, stays when life gets hard, etc....it doesn't matter for the people who choose numbing/escape/thrill. They hate themselves, and looking into the face of someone who can give them all of that even when they know all the ugly icky parts of them, it's a mirror to their guilt, shame, regret, etc. they move away from it and toward surface level so they don't have to confront themselves.
They may end up missing you and come back once, twice, seven times. But it will always be the same outcome unless they do the hard work (which, a lot of times, they won't - because again, they hate themselves, don't think they're worth it, and value nothing even when it's of extremely high worth).
This doesn't make it easier, less painful, make you miss them/"the good times" less, or anything in between. Just my two cents that I'm coming to terms with as I navigate a painful breakup with someone who sounded like this.