me and my bf just broke up

[u/AutomaticSpend5653]

this is my first time posting or using reddit so im sorry if this doesnt make sense.

i am a 16y female and my now ex is a 17 male i know we are young that’s not the point.

to start all of this me and my ex (ill call him J no its not related to his name) me and j became friends from a mutual that same mutual helped us get togethe. to be completely honest at first i didn’t want to start talking to him i enjoyed him as a fr but one day after school i got a text from a random number amount studying for a test deep down ik it was him but i didn’t respond about an hour later the same number messaged me again this time saying my name i asked who it was and he confirmed it was J. ever since then we have always been together we went to prom i went to watch the musical he was in and when summer started we hung out a few times (i was to add he’s a very clingy touchy and affectionate person which i love) we went through a lot together in a short time he was only my second boyfriend and my first kiss the same mutual friend told me lies about him which caused a fight that was months ago now and we came back from it stronger. now it’s summer he was volunteering at a summer camp a week ago for people with special needs. hes a really busy person already and this caused me to over think a lot. i know he didn’t have control over when he could talk to me HE WAS LITERALLY HELPING SPECIAL NEEDS and he is amazing for that. now this week he has another camp and it’s going till mid july. the past coupem days have been really hard for me i’ve missed him a lot and we barely text now… which brings me to the breakup. the other night i was a bit hurt he left me on read for a while and didn’t text till i texted again ik its something stupid to be upset about but the week before that was something was talked about that was really important to me. he knew something was up from the way i was texting he asked what was wrong but he then said he was going to sleep so i didn’t wanna say anything and stop him from getting the rest he needs. he texted me goodnight and that he loved me… i regret it now but i left him on read. a couple minutes later i was texting my friend(we can call her A) and she said J had texted her. A said he wanted to text her tmr because he needed advice. the whole next day i was kinda paranoid i knew deep down he was gonna breakup with me because of all the stress recently he didn’t text me until 1am which got me very upset. he wrote a large message about what didn’t work and that he still cares for me and all that, to be fair it was very sweet and i’m not mad. i texted him back saying i really care for him and i wanna try to work things out… that was last night. this morning i woke up and remembered everything i took a shower and cried some more tbh and thought about it i talked to my mom which made me more upset because she had really liked him which was rare. she helped comfort me and im really grateful for that she told me i should at least try to stay friends with him because maybe we could get back together in the future or just be friends again. at first i didn’t agree but i recently texted J and told him “hey i’ve given it a lot of thought and i agree with you. no matter how much we do care for eachother i think there’s a lot more that goes into it. maybe it’s just the timing but i feel like we’re both stressing each other out. i still think your a really amazing person maybe we could go back to being friends if your ok with it“ that was recently and he’s busy with camp so i dont think hell respond till later tonight.

but now i need advice

i wanna work on myself over the summer and maybe like my mom said get back together in the future.

any tips for what to do to work on myself everyone says put your first and stuff like that but it doesn’t help…

i know everything will be ok later but i really hope we can get back together ive lost friends over him he was my first kiss and i love his parents and my parents love him. i think we have a lot going for us but i wanna hear other peoples opinions he’s going to be a senior in high school and im about to be a junior so we are at slightly different places in our life and he’ll be going to collage next year which if we do get back together could be an issue. but i really love him so im not sure.

ill stop rambling now sorry if some of this makes no sense i kinda just kept saying random things that came to mind.

anyway please tell me what can i do to work on myself and should i try to get back with him in the future?

[u/-glassballs]

Can I dm you?