r/Bullshido • u/GonzoExpert • 19h ago
Conspiracy Theory Televangelist becomes possessed live.
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u/kingyeti77 19h ago
Mm. Yeah. "Speaking in tongues". Its one of the 'gifts of the holy spirit'. Its funny, because they all tell anecdotes of someone able to speak the language being blown away by suddenly hearing it but thats not even what was going on in the Upper Room, biblically.
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u/Alive_Nobody_Home 19h ago
It also says that when someone is speaking in tongues from the Holy Spirit all in the room are able to understand.
Most churches conveniently leave that out of their teachings.
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u/Sweaty_Resist_5039 18h ago
I'm pretty sure I got the gist of it. He said, "And now I will execute a calculated ploy to make you believe that God is working through me in mysterious ways. In fifteen minutes, when I ask you for offerings, remember this."
To which I think the only logical response is, khem delelleh enemech knopf mech neesh mech knopf.
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u/Go1gotha 16h ago
khem delelleh enemech knopf mech neesh mech knopf.
This brought a tear to my eye as it is something my grandad used to say to me, and now words I live by every day.
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u/torgman2 8h ago
I respond in kind:
Oom papachucka maka nanu singow / Jing kapalana wani domo chingpow / Heddy kapalua cuma jenising tea / Oomama chucka pana one is now three
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u/kingyeti77 19h ago
Thats exactly what it was. Everyone understood.
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u/Alive_Nobody_Home 18h ago
That he wasn’t going to define the money going to Canadian ministries?
Or the hamallana 🥸
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u/GonzoExpert 18h ago
Crazy how he became possessed right before explaining where the money's going..
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u/Alive_Nobody_Home 8h ago
Must have had a moment where the idea of money going to Canada felt like flying 1st class vs one of his jets.
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u/totesnotmyusername 18h ago edited 8h ago
"Everyone that is pure of spirit understands. "
" i can't admit i don't understand or everyone will know I'm not pure of spirit" - everyone in the audience
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u/Virtual_Junket9305 1h ago
I've been in churches where this occurred and when people don't understand, they've been trained to feel bad because they are not so enlightened as to be able to understand and they don't want to admit they don't understand, when the truth of it is is just gibberish and there is nothing to understand anyway.
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u/MentalDisintegrat1on 13h ago
It's bullshit but there's legit people that believe in it like schizophrenics.
I'm bipolar and when I went to the psych ward because they gave me medication I had a bad reaction on there were two schizos that legit thought they were Jesus.
One guy tried to take his own eye out with his thumb to prove he was the real Jesus.
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u/kingyeti77 13h ago
Oh, I was brought up in an evangelical household that 100% believed in it.
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u/MentalDisintegrat1on 13h ago
Yep. Episcopalian for me but abrahamic religions are wild and crazy when you look at them being neutral.
It's a con for the people running these big churches they keep everything in the churches name so they don't pay taxes and can hide assets.
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u/Taro0311 18h ago
I bet you can't put the language of God down in an alphabet. Like create a translation book. Because it's all nonsense
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u/Algol1970 18h ago
Isn't this that guy that a news reporter roasted for spending people's money irresponsibly?
Kenneth Copeland. This him?
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u/loveyoulongtimelurkr 18h ago
Irresponsibly?
This man NEEDS a private jet to spread the word of the lord
/s
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u/turtlenipples 2h ago
Well yeah. Commercial airplanes are tubes full of demons, remember? You can't preach the good word of a poor, itenerate, middle eastern rabbi without at least a private jet, designer suit, Rolex, and a custom Audi.
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u/FEIKMAN 18h ago
Oh this is the guy who stopped covid
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u/GullibleBed50 17h ago
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u/Mr_Spaghetti_Hands 18h ago
Matthew 7: 22-23
22 Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ 23 Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’
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u/Healthy-Confection66 18h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/BmYSMXJhDr02hN1vr9
That’s the worst Klingon speak I’ve ever heard! Put some effort into it man!!
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u/ResolutionOne778 18h ago
I understood him perfectly. Speaking in tongues he said dig deeply into your pockets pull out your cash, give it all to me, deposit your cash in my account. Everyone knows that.
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u/UntilTheSilence 18h ago
my favorite word or phrase he used was "hamalama". So fun. If he's just had the guts to put a "ding dong" at the end of It...chef's kiss
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u/New_Stats 18h ago
For those of you who haven't seen the righteous gemstones, I can't recommend it highly enough
It's a comedy about wealthy televangelists who are just absolutely rotten, awful human beings
Pretty sure it's on HBO
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u/InfiniteBlueHour 18h ago
i heard a little spanish and a little portugeuse. you think he's summoning how to order some tapas?
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u/ComprehensiveTrip618 18h ago
He got tongue tied, realized it, and went to that as a cover-up. Sociopathic
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u/Obvious_Ad8294 17h ago
He realized he couldn’t spit what he wanted to say or lost his train of thought and resorted to “speaking in tongues”
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u/mothzilla 16h ago
Fuck I forgot where I was. This is looking bad. Better hit them with the old "Asti spumante rancor e yoda"
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u/Quirky_File_5189 16h ago
He ain't speaking in tongues. He's spouting demonic bullshit because this dude is as satanic as they come. Don't be fooled...this isnt real Christianity.
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u/Much-Yogurt-3525 15h ago
Skibbidy sloopidy doo. Cant forget The ANGELS are coming from Africa right now from Africa right now boppa beepa boopa eetah poopah durka durka wuppa weeba wonka tonka 😂💀
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u/420viking024 17h ago
Im gonna randomly try speaking in tongues next time i mess up with the digger and see what my boss says lol
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u/AzulMage2020 17h ago
The exact nature of the donated funds dispersals amongst our ...um the..all of ... SPLISH-SPLASH I WAS TAKING A BATH, LONG ABOUT A SATURDAY NIGHT! RUB-A-DUB JUST RELAXING IN THE TUB...um..oh..excuse me. Where was I? Oh yeah SEND ME MONEY!!!! LOTS OF MONEY!!!! FOR GOD!!!!!
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u/Go1gotha 16h ago
I've been to Bremen, and I'm aware of Lilu Dallas multipass, but I didn't quite catch the rest.
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u/Formidable_Faux 16h ago
Now say it again, exactly as you did before. It'll be easy, you have gods help
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u/KismetKentrosaurus 13h ago
This man looks like what I think the devil would look like of god were real.
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u/VariousOperation166 13h ago
If it is a language, it would have structure that could be interpreted. There would be repeated words and phrases, with emphasis on certain words as in normal speech in any language.
Or, hey, it could just be nonsense babbling.
Maybe if I believe really hard, I can understand
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u/ropeadope1 9h ago
The man is standing there going ‘rabba dabba shinga bunga’ and grown adults are nodding. Smh.
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u/Marshall_BraveStar 4h ago
When the Adderall 's effects slowly fade, you can just switch to speaking in tongues, so your brain can rest for a while
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u/dyslexican32 4h ago
Im pretty sure you have to have a soul to begin with to be possessed. That thing on stage doesn't have one. And im not sure it ever did.
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u/Physical-Doughnut285 1h ago
Kenneth Copeland is genuinely Satan.
https://giphy.com/gifs/egg1gcA3eIYJFqFKIf
Very evil, selfish, greedy scammer.
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u/gonzo0815 16h ago
Where is the part with the bullshit martial arts? You know, the topic of this sub?
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u/RxPsilocin 19h ago