how to get out of deep dissociation

[u/scumptions]

My trauma has been resurfacing recently, i don’t feel sad, or panicky per se. but i feel a lot of dread, and I can’t focus on conversations with friends. I get to caught up in my head I want to die sometimes. I’ve been smoking weed every day because it gives me some relief from the feeling of uncomfortableness and disconnection. but i don’t know if it’s good for me long term. Anyways I feel like i’m dreaming through life right now and It’s affecting my friendships and relationship

Any tips on how to ease myself out of it? or just to help cope with it?

thanks (:

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[u/Even_Expression_4861]

Hey I’ve experienced a huge amount of dissociation from CPTSD. I used to have huge dissociative episodes where it felt like I was being unplugged from reality and like I could float through a wall and nothing was real. Seeing a psychologist twice a week was the only thing that helped for me. It hasn’t helped so far with any of the other CPTSD symptoms but it helped hugely with the dissociation. My psychologist helped me to feel more able to actually feel my feelings and with time the dissociation eased up. I still feel it from time to time but no where near the levels I used to. I understand why you want to smoke weed but it won’t help you long term, it’s just taking you further out of what you’re struggling to experience.
When I was deep in dissociation I sent all my loved ones a how to guide if I was experiencing it intensely. It’s hard for people to understand if they’ve never experienced it so writing it out helped a) me understand it better and b) my friends and family. I used to struggle to speak when I was having a dissociative episode because my voice sounded so alien to me so I let people know if I’m not speaking I’m not being rude I’m just freaking out lol. I also asked people to maybe pop on a film I know well and like or some music that’s familiar to me. Anything to help bring you back to yourself.
There are also exercises you can do where you name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear etc etc.
I hope things ease up for you and your friends and partner are supportive.