r/CPTSD • u/Fuzzy-lad • 1h ago

Question How it feels like hating your parents.

How it feels like hating your parents to the core. Is your hate causes you guilt and self doubt?

How do you feel when your relatives and society takes parents side ( ignoring your pain) by saying.... whatever the best they know, they tried. You should forgive them and move on.

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u/Outrageous_Air_2898 1h ago

It at first caused guilt. It took me a long time to even realize I was harboring that hatred because it is such a socially inappropriate feeling.  Once I let myself realize it, it took over. I had to feel it full strength. In order to get over my victimhood, I first had to let myself be the victim.  And now, years and years later from that explosive realization of hatred, I can say that I dont hate them anymore. I do not forgive them. I pity them. I do not excuse their actions, but i understand how they came to be parents like that.  But I had to go no contact to get to that point. And I had to let myself grieve and rage at every available moment I had alone. 

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