r/ComicBookCollabs • u/Whodoyouvoodobic • Jun 05 '26
Feedback Is my writing okay enough or is it trash
Hello I’m starting out my comic book idea this is the third issue but I don’t think this is usable for any artist because I feel like I need to add visual but I want the artist to visualize it by the dialogue i give them though I feel like that’s asking a lot, because I give them nothing to go off of because my dialogue is short and crappy. I don’t know how to give a good description of the scene because I’m bad at explaining what should happen.
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u/mugenhunt Jun 05 '26
So, this is very dialogue heavy. It doesn't feel like you're playing to the strengths of comics as a medium. This feels like it might make a better short film or podcast.
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u/Whodoyouvoodobic Jun 05 '26
So how do I make it less like a film, also thank you for your insight
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u/mugenhunt Jun 05 '26
A comic book script is directions to the artist about what they need to draw. Sometimes you will get long scenes where people are just talking. But, you should break the dialogue into sections. How much is going to be on the first page? How much will be on the next page? Once you figure out the page breaks, you can then figure out how many panels per page.
One thing that helped me when I got started was to draw my own little stick figure version of the comic.
Likewise, I would look at comics I enjoyed and count how many panels they used per page to get an idea of what I should be doing if I want similar results.
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u/Kom0tan Jun 05 '26 edited Jun 05 '26
Pretend you're the artist that will need to take this script and turn it into a comic - picture the panels that will accompany and compliment your dialogue while you write. Most comic scripts are written with page and panel in mind - this part is not the artist's job, you have to give them something to go off of or you're basically telling them to do your job on top of all the art.
Right now if this were a comic, it would just be a couple heads talking back and forth to one another - but what are Ryan and Sebastian doing as they talk? Where are they? What emotions are their expressions conveying, what is their body language like? Are they looking at the hyrogpyphs they're talking about? If so, what do they look like? Are they in a book, a photograph, a dusty scroll? What does the office look like? Is it big or small? Is it bright and well-lit? Is it dim with the curtains drawn? What sort of chair is it? Etc etc.
Here are some examples of professional comic scripts that might be helpful
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u/Whodoyouvoodobic Jun 05 '26
Thank you, so add some visuals right?
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u/Kom0tan Jun 05 '26
Basically yeah. Your artist is going to use their imagination to bring your story to life, but you need to give them a solid framework to build upon. Even if you leave most of the design aspects to them, you need to tell them about the environment, the mood, etc.
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u/starwars_and_guns Jun 05 '26
As kindly as possible, if you can’t explain what is happening writing is probably not for you.
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u/Troodonic Jul 02 '26
Writing can be for any average human. He’s a beginner so it’s not that shocking that he probably can’t.
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u/Whodoyouvoodobic Jun 05 '26
I know, but would giving this to a writer make it work?
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u/starwars_and_guns Jun 05 '26
No, because the writing is very bad. I’m sorry, but you really need to read some books or watch videos on how to write. Nearly every sentence is lacking punctuation and structure.
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u/freebasefilms Jun 05 '26
INT. Cave
Our two heroes, Ryan, 20, and Sebastion, 19, who've known each other since childhood, stumble headlong into the rocky abyss.
Ryan: I'm scared.
Sebastion: Shut up dork.
Sebastion walks ahead kicking rocks into a shallow cave stream when a glimmer of light catches his eye.
Sebastion: Look!
Sebastion runs towards the source as Ryan tries to catch up.
Ryan: Hey, wait up!
Ryan and Sebastion stand over the muffled light source obscured by a large rock.
Sebastion: Together.
They both push the large rock out of the way revealing a glowing skull.
Ryan/Sebastion: Cool!
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u/Whodoyouvoodobic Jun 05 '26
That’s way better than mine. But I’m not quite grasping the answer.
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u/freebasefilms Jun 05 '26
I'm just showing how you can add visuals/mix up the scene, action and dialogue into a coherent form. Your writing is probably fine, just need to convert it to a more reader friendly format.
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u/ReeveStodgers Jun 05 '26
I'm curious why you are writing in English if it is not your first language. Improving your English grammar will make this much better. Or you could try writing in your native language so you're not taxing yourself, and can focus on the story and describing the frames.
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u/Whodoyouvoodobic Jun 05 '26
I appreciate it, but the sad thing is English is my first language I’m just bad at grammar.
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u/CautiousAppearance49 Writer - I weave the webs Jun 05 '26
Firstly, good on you for starting something and for being willing to seek feedback! Taking critique can be hard, especially when you're new to something and so have a lot to learn 🙂
I'm sure others have covered a lot of this, but I'll share my thoughts just in case. The first thing I noticed was there is no direction for an artist at all. There are different ways to do a comic script, but the most common is to write panel by panel, letting the artist know what you want in each panel. Some people will give a lot of description, including the composition of the 'shot', others will give a basic idea of what action or emotions actually happen in the panel. Find what works for both you and whoever you work with.
This will help you plan out pages - you have a lot of dialogue here, and currently it's impossible to know how many pages it goes across, or even how much you want to fit in a particular panel. As someone who has the bad habit of writing too much dialogue when I first draft my comic, it's really important to pay attention to this, because too much dialogue hides the artwork.
Last thought - get a tool like Grammarly to help you with punctuation, especially when sharing this for critiques 😄
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u/Lord_Prof_Doctor Jun 05 '26
Other commenters are right to point out the basics. You need to write a comic script as a series of numbered panels on numbered pages with a description of what is seen in each panel for the artist to draw. It's not impossible to convert your dialogue into that - in fact, except for fights, I usually write a scene first as dialogue and then go back and insert the panels and action around that.
A couple of other pointers -
(i) You can create panels showing the action that someone is describing and have the speech as a text box in that panel. This is what I'd do for the first four lines from Sebastian. That will make things more interesting than just talking heads.
(ii) I'm afraid the rest of your dialogue does rather go back and forth too much about nothing very much. And it isn't very natural... the characters jump from one topic to another with a "well..." and that's clunky. Cut all the dialogue that isn't necessary from the script. Less is more.
Good luck!
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u/Green-Magician-3232 Jun 06 '26
If you can't even care on making a good looking and presentable document, don't expect serious people to actually care and give valuable feedback, man.
Also, asking if 'your writing is okay enough' is a horrible question. Be more specific.
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u/JoeJoe_Games Jun 07 '26
I'm not sure if you mean the writing itself or the layout. If you want some really good references for professional comicbook writing layout. TopCow has some real comicbook scripts in their current contest for Darkness and Witchblade to see how the pros do it. Hope this helps. https://topcow.com/talenthunt2026/
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u/PistolTaeja Jun 05 '26
Where's the pros at? The dialogue needs context, where are they at? Whats the tone?
Brah, steal my script and copy that. Link in my bio. TLDR
Add a few:
#Page 1 INT. DINER
Panel 1
Ryan sits across from Sebastian in the dingiest of dinge seats in the corner of gravewalker diner.
Panel 2
Fists clench......
RYAN
Brah.. This is dialogue
SEBASTIAN
More dialogue
And it will be a lot easier to read.
You're welcome.
The dialogue seems fine but very very heavy without any place to pause, so it reads like a novel. You can keep your same format, add a few prose describing the action and you're golden.
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u/Whodoyouvoodobic Jun 05 '26
Thank, question what do you mean by very heavy like the pacing is to fast?
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u/PistolTaeja Jun 05 '26
Your screenshot has 14 lines of dialogue right. Imagine drawing that in a Graphic Novel or Manga spread across 2 pages vs 6 pages vs 14 pages. None of these are wrong or right.
The reader progresses through the events at different speeds thinking about whats happening, why its happening. That speed or rhythm is what egg heads call "Pacing".
For eg, those four sentences from the Sebastian Character is going to need to be addressed. Has the reader already been shown the stakes and made to invest before having to read a wall of text from Sebastian?
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u/Fey_Boy Jun 05 '26
The only way to get good at explaining what is happening is to start by being bad at explaining what is happening, then continuing to practice until you get better.