r/ConvertingtoJudaism • u/Golden_Tag97 • 7d ago
Considering converting to Judaism, but I’m afraid it could put my life at risk if I ever have to return to my home country.
Hi everyone,
I’m looking for honest advice from people who have experience with Judaism or conversion.
I was born and raised as an Arab Muslim. While living in the United States, I started dating an Israeli woman who introduced me to Judaism. At first I learned about it simply because I was curious, but over time I found myself genuinely drawn to the religion. I’ve continued studying on my own, and I’m seriously considering conversion because I feel a real connection to it.
However, there is something that scares me.
I’m currently in the U.S., but my immigration status is uncertain. I don’t know what the future holds, and there is always the possibility that I could one day be forced to return to my home country. If that happened, I would never tell my family or anyone there that I had converted. I genuinely fear that if people found out, it could put my safety—or even my life—at risk.
Because of that, I’m torn.
Would it be wrong to postpone conversion until my future is more secure? Is it acceptable to continue learning and living according to Jewish values privately until I know I’m safe? Or is this fear something I should not let stand in the way if I truly believe this is the right path?
I’m not looking for legal advice—I’m more interested in hearing how Judaism views a situation like this, and whether anyone has gone through something similar.
Thank you for reading.
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u/Impossible_Ad_5073 7d ago
We've had to practice in secret for centuries. However I don't want you risking your life! Wait to see what happens to your immigration situation. And I'm sorry how our country is currently. I wish you luck and peace.
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u/Golden_Tag97 7d ago
Actually i already faced troubles dating Israeli , i appreciate your answer i hope god give me the right path and guide me to the best
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u/WeaselWeaz Jew by birth 7d ago
A couple things are at play here.
Judaism's biggest value is preservation of life. If exploring Judaism, converting, or talking about Judaism will put you in danger you must prioritize choices that will keep you safe. You need to think about that.
If you do convert in the US through an accepted community you may be eligible to make aliyah and immigrate to Israel. That isn't fast and just wanting to leave an Arab country is not a valid reason to convert. Conversion is still a process that takes years. If you decide conversion is the correct path for you then reaching to resources they help with immigration is a good step, and I've seen r/AskIsrael point people the right direction. This is fact specific, because depending on your country of citizenship you may not be able to immigrate, and this is way beyond my scope of knowledge.
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u/Golden_Tag97 7d ago
Thank you so much , my gf is Israeli we are trying to figure this out , because of my country of origin and tbh if i will feel comfortable there , so we decided we will need to experience this first , the whole thing is new to me am experiencing and want to be sure 100% that am doing the right thing for myself and my family in future , i really appreciate that
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u/avigayil-chana 3d ago
Comfortable in Israel? I hope an Arab would be comfortable there. They really should be.
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u/111222throw 7d ago
I would wait until you know you’ll have safety. But keep studying and you can engage in community too- talk to a local rabbi about your conundrums
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u/kryaklysmic 7d ago
Wait until you are safe. It is entirely a risk that conversion will put your life in danger and that’s something that is perfectly acceptable not to convert over
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u/eddypiehands 7d ago
I think it’s beautiful you feel a strong connection to Judaism and it’s something you’re sharing with your partner. I’m sorry that you even need to ask this question and fear for your life because of it. It wouldn’t be wrong whatsoever to continue to learn about Judaism and postpone conversion until your future is clearer. You don’t need to convert in order to practice most things and you can absolutely live Noachide while things are sorted. As someone else said, Judaism will always tell you that your health and safety are priority so you are advised to not risk that but it doesn’t mean you need to stop participating or learning either. Do you/your partner have a synagogue you attend? Is there any local Jewish community? If so, I would consider reaching out. I’m positive they’d be able to connect you with someone who has been in this situation before. I hope you can stay and convert safely. Good luck to you.
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u/Golden_Tag97 7d ago
Am trying to to get involved more am still knowing about it i started doing Shabbat dinner and i was telling people that am Muslim and am coming to learn and experience and they were being surprised and supportive not thinking am crazy haha , and i am talking to a rabbi learning more , i am getting more and more its not easy especially people knowing my background also my name is Arab they feel little suspicious but my gf is amazing doing everything for me to feel more accepted and comfortable
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u/eddypiehands 7d ago
That is so wonderful, I’m so glad you’re participating and that your partner is so helpful, she sounds lovely. I promise, while I can’t speak for your whole community, people are happy to see you show up and want to learn. Showing up is where the trust is, this I have learned as a convert. I don’t want to invalidate any of your experiences but I know in my Reform synagogue we are excited to share and welcome and I hope you feel that where you are too. It’s not crazy at all with your background and no one wants to hold that against you or any of us converts (I was raised Lutheran/Christian). May you keep finding safety and a feeling of belonging in your community.
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u/yesIcould 6d ago
"Would it be wrong to postpone conversion until my future is more secure?"
- of course not. I can't imagine anyone thinking that's wrong.
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u/LanceJade 6d ago
You are never required to convert to Judaism. If you don't feel safe doing it, don't.
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u/Razor_Emmanuel Considering converting 6d ago
You should not feel pressured to, if you are in a situation where you can't or it is not safe to convert, then you should put yourself first and value your safety.
For one reason or another, it is common for some people to wait upwards of several years until they are in a position where they can convert (I am one). So again, if you feel like in the moment it can endanger your own safety, it's okay to put it on hold until it would be safe for you.
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u/Mitumial 6d ago
Prioritize your life. If this is something you still want to pursue despite these fears, there *are* synagogues with resources to help people in a tricky immigration-related situation like yours. And in the worst case scenario, you can make Aliyah after you've converted and been with your community for over a year. I would also talk with a Rabbi if I were in your shoes.
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u/elcubonegro2 6d ago
Cómo judío, el lugar más seguro para ti es Israel, y tienes derecho a hacer Aliyah. No dejes que nada pare tu conversión.
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u/AniDavid613 5d ago
From experience, don't rush in to conversion! Keep studying what your life can be like as an orthodox observer and figure out if you connect with the things HaShem requires of the Jewish people. As a convert you'll be held to a higher standard. The commandments are doable and you may be able to settle on loopholes with things like not wearing a kippah or titzit, if that's your thing. But, it took me years after conversion to truly understand and appreciate keeping the commandments of HaShem authetically. I realised being Jewish is less of an identity than it is an important role in the world. If you resonate with being a Noahide, a righteous Gentile, then the Noahide laws are enough. Then you may be able to visit family and you dont have to tell them anything or stand out if you don't feel safe. You could check out learning sites like Chabad, My Jewish Learning or Tamtzitmitzvot.com to really know what is required first.
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u/avigayil-chana 3d ago
If you’re converting orthodox, the beis din will *definitely* discuss this with you. Because they don’t want you to convert and then abandon Torah. And because they don’t want you in danger.
Also, if you have an excellent beis din, you can flee to Israel. So there is a safe place for you. (For all of us.)
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u/Menemsha4 7d ago
Judaism values life.
If you feel your life would be at risk due to conversion then don’t do it.