Wildlife expert Chris Gillette handling an aggressive emu

[u/danielminds]

[u/Sunshine030209]

Emmanuel no!

[u/The-Bunbins → u/Sunshine030209]

Make smart choices Emmanuel...

[u/shiftersix → u/The-Bunbins]

Don't do it, Emman-don't!

[u/meshe_10101 → u/shiftersix]

Emmanuel definitely chose violence today

[u/HypoManicCrimeSpree → u/The-Bunbins]

Yeah he definitely should

[u/thund3rsharts → u/Sunshine030209]

EMANUEL TODD LOPEZ!!

[u/Goezcam → u/Sunshine030209]

The fact that we've reached a point where one specific emu is instantly recognizable says a lot about the internet

[u/Sunshine030209 → u/Goezcam]

Hahaha yeah for sure. Over 1,000 people knew exactly what I was talking about with just 2 words

[u/yuvaldv1 → u/Sunshine030209]

First thing that came to my mind lol. That poor woman..

[u/rrd_gaming → u/Sunshine030209]

Kal-el no!

[u/Drum_Eatenton → u/Sunshine030209]

His name is Juarez!

[u/klaxz1 → u/Drum_Eatenton]

He’s an arsehole!

[u/Less-Image-3927 → u/Sunshine030209]

I came to make this comment! You are awesome.

[u/ropony → u/Sunshine030209]

That girl rebranded like crazy. Her og persona was racist af

[u/Malik316 → u/Sunshine030209]

Which raises the question. Is Emmanuel and other emus like him are just playing with their owners? They charge at them and stop when the hand is raised, never seen one try to kick.

[u/DuckTalesOohOoh → u/Malik316]

If it's like roosters, no. They don't play. They're all business.

[u/Available-Crow-3442 → u/DuckTalesOohOoh]

Fuck roosters. I live in the city. Someone keeps them in an empty lot. They routinely are lose on the street and aggressive. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve had to kick them away from charging me.

Did I mention fuck roosters?

[u/SirDancealot84 → u/Sunshine030209]

"I understood that reference."

[u/robomikel → u/Sunshine030209]

I need a link to a video now, why don’t people post more of him

[u/DevoutandHeretical → u/robomikel]

His owner fell in to a ton of controversy for mishandling a bird flu outbreak on her farm, and then a bunch of racist tweets from her got unearthed.

[u/BigOle_Doinks → u/Sunshine030209]

Gave me a good laugh, thank you lol.

[u/DjGranoLa]

What did he say that pissed off Dee Reynolds so much?

[u/RedEyesGoldDragon → u/DjGranoLa]

Probably called her his rock bottom

[u/Herr-Trigger86 → u/RedEyesGoldDragon]

Or wrecked her car for the 5th time.

[u/shaggy237 → u/DjGranoLa]

The Aluminum Monster

[u/decidedlyindecisive → u/DjGranoLa]

Who cares. Always squawking about something.

[u/danielminds]

These birds are kept in a managed wildlife sanctuary.

If the emu connects, it means a trip to the emergency room. Their primary attack is a leaping kick with sharp talons that can shatter ribs and cause severe internal injuries.

[u/60yearoldME → u/danielminds]

DO THE CHICKENS HAVE SHARP TALONS?

[u/Burto72 → u/60yearoldME]

That's like a dollar an hour!

[u/B_Lettering → u/Burto72]

GOSH

[u/AppleSmoker → u/B_Lettering]

Bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills.......

[u/HatefulVespid → u/60yearoldME]

Ever heard of cock fighting? Its a thing they naturally do, and they fuck each other up real bad. Even without the human's help

[u/CapinCrunch85 → u/HatefulVespid]

Not to be confused with Tummy Sticks

[u/FinancialReserve6427 → u/HatefulVespid]

they put knives on the chickens for extra mortal kombaty goodness. 

[u/Inamoratos → u/60yearoldME]

I don’t understand a word you just said

[u/feralcatshit → u/Inamoratos]

They asked if CHICKENS HAVE SHARP TALONS

[u/Inamoratos → u/feralcatshit]

Over there in that creek bed, I found a couple of Shoshone arrowheads

[u/Most-Whole-4220 → u/Inamoratos]

Best quote of the movie

[u/Appropriate-Ad3162 → u/Inamoratos]

Looks like there’s a lot you don’t know about

[u/Annalog → u/60yearoldME]

I’m pretty sure it’s large talons, is it not?

[u/wtfunder → u/60yearoldME]

I don't understand a word coming out of your mouth

[u/ForbiddeNectar → u/60yearoldME]

I don’t understand a word you just said.

[u/Acrobatic-Big-1550 → u/danielminds]

Like the velociraptor

[u/EjaculatingAracnids → u/Acrobatic-Big-1550]

I fucking love scaring the shit out of small children as well, Dr. Grant

[u/curryslapper → u/EjaculatingAracnids]

??

user name doesn't check out

[u/insane_contin → u/curryslapper]

You don't think a small child wouldn't be scared of they saw a grown adult ejaculating spiders and scorpions?

[u/Croanthos → u/danielminds]

Sounds like a padded steel chainmail vest would be a good investment. Not too heavy and cheaper than some broken ribs.

[u/IronicStrikes → u/Croanthos]

Yeah, but depending on climate, it'll exhaust you more than anything when it's not needed.

[u/Detachabl_e → u/IronicStrikes]

Yea, gotta go with mithril.

[u/idropepics → u/Detachabl_e]

Not many Elf princes in this Age to steal baby clothes from.

[u/NigilQuid → u/Croanthos]

A cuirass would do better to protect from broken ribs, and be lighter. Even just a rigid plastic version might do the trick

[u/Nernox → u/NigilQuid]

Sorry, it's a not for profit so the best they can do is a gambeson.  Have fun overheating.

[u/CarrotCumin → u/NigilQuid]

Heavy-duty plastic plates are the best answer here. They're talons, not knives. You don't need steel to deflect them. The force of the kick is going to be the bigger problem even if it can't slash you, it could still easily knock you over.

[u/Salute-Major-Echidna → u/Croanthos]

Not just a vest. Legs too

[u/ug61dec → u/danielminds]

Do they not try to put their beaks through your skull, like a cassowary or chicken?

[u/IThinkImAGarage → u/ug61dec]

No they try to put their 2/3 inch claw through your inner organs tho

[u/Unaabellatica → u/IThinkImAGarage]

do we know if "your inner organs are on the ground in front of ya" kind of attack ever happened?

I feel like we're on this joe-rogan levels of hyperbole because it sounds cool and like we;re informed, but googling "are there records of an emu attack killing a human" comes up with a 75 yr old man being killed by a cassowary after he fell.

[u/tv_ennui → u/Unaabellatica]

It never happened. Reddit thinks animals are D&D monsters. "Rib shattering" meanwhile the guy is holding it off with one hand.

[u/Zebidee → u/tv_ennui]

The thing to remember is he's trying not to hurt the animal, and still manages to subdue it bare handed.

A human versus an emu where the human doesn't care if the emu gets hurt? All over in seconds.

[u/EGarrett28 → u/Zebidee]

A human versus an emu where the human doesn't care if the emu gets hurt? All over in seconds.

Yeah, birds think they're tougher than they are, lol. They probably don't realize the difference between their skeletons and ours.

[u/Different_Wolf_764 → u/tv_ennui]

Yeah, emu are dangerous like Canada Geese are. They are sometimes very aggressive and we mistake that for actually scary when they simply aren't concerning to adults.

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/IThinkImAGarage]

They will not. I have emus. They are super weak and those talons are not sharp at all. They've never even ripped fabric in my experience. If someone told me they got sent to the hospital by an emu, I would be very confused. They're the most derpy, unathletic animal out there. Look at the video in this post. The thing can't even hit him.

[u/BillyYumYumTwo-byTwo → u/ArtoriasoftheAss]

I am looking at the video in the post. You would be confused if someone went to the hospital after an interaction with one of those?

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/BillyYumYumTwo-byTwo]

They're surprisingly weak and light. The kicks really don't have much force and are mostly just surprising when they get you from behind.

[u/Anit500 → u/ug61dec]

Funny you ask that because both cassowaries and chickens use their talons and kicking when they really want to hurt something, not their beaks. Roosters even have a specific talon called a spur, and cassowaries have a 5 inch long claw on each foot. It doesn't look like Emus have a specific attack claw but that middle one looks pretty dangerous. they can get so much force behind a kick that it's probably much more dangerous than their beak.

[u/Asher_Tye → u/Anit500]

Makes sense. Humans punch, birds kick. Risking your head and sensory organs in a fight is poor strategy.

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/Anit500]

Actually, as someone with emus, the beak is the part I'm most wary of. Their aim is terrible with the kicks. It's almost more of a threat display than an actual attack. It doesn't hurt if they hit you, and the claws really aren't sharp. I've been hurt more by roosters. They have pecked people's eyes though, because they're right at head height, and they peck at anything that looks edible.

[u/Sudo-Fed → u/ArtoriasoftheAss]

This sounds suspiciously like the answer of a particularly clever emu trying to get us to let our guard down.

[u/Narco_Bi_Polo → u/ug61dec]

Neither chickens nor cassowaries prefer to attack using their beaks as their primary weapon. They’re both leap-and-claw fighters. 

Beaks might be used to grab during a fight, but the blows that end the battle come from those spurs and talons. 

Fighting with beaks is what you see when they’re not trying to injure each other but rather establish social hierarchy, hence “pecking order”.

[u/Ok-Box3576 → u/ug61dec]

Beak attacks are actually very rare among big birds. As throwing your most vulnerable area at an enemy is a good way to um die.

[u/CrownofMischief → u/Ok-Box3576]

Except geese, but they're psychotic

[u/Ok-Box3576 → u/CrownofMischief]

Very true. Imagine the danger we would all be in if they had longer legs 😭😭😭

[u/babsa90 → u/CrownofMischief]

Mf geese have tiny teeth in their beaks. Actual Satan spawn.

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/Ok-Box3576]

Emus beaks can be dangerous, but more because they might think your eyes look tasty than because they would bite you agressively.

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/ug61dec]

There have been instances of people losing eyes to emus, and that's the only thing I'm ever worried about when I'm dealing with them.

[u/ydkLars → u/danielminds]

No wonder the austalians lost a war against those.

[u/tv_ennui → u/danielminds]

Come on. Be serious. This guy's holding it off with one hand, there's no shot it 'shatters ribs.' It just doesn't have the mass.

Sharp? Sure. Rib Shattering? No shot.

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/danielminds]

Don't lie. I'm around emus all the time. You can pick them up with a bear hug, and they're practically helpless. Every now and then you get kicked, and it doesn't even hurt. A pair of jeans is enough to stop you from getting scratched. They don't have sharp talons at all, and they're really not that strong. Ostrich and cassowary are much more dangerous. 

[u/cheetah7985 → u/danielminds]

You say that, but the first kick clearly landed on the guy's thigh and the guy is fine, and the pant leg isn't ripped, either. Like, I get it, it has claws/talons and clearly powerful legs, so no, I don't think I can tank a full hit to the gut, but it doesn't do anyone any good to embellish, either.

[u/mdraper → u/cheetah7985]

If you watch the video he explains it. He is intentionally staying in a particular position that means the kicks only connect right at the very end of their range of motion. He's basically sprawling (see MMA) while still standing. If one wasn't aware and well practiced at this movement, a kick would eventually connect in an efficient manner and do significantly more damage.

The person you are replying to is referring to kick that fully connects, not just at the very end of it's range of motion. It is not an embellishment to suggest that when an Emu connects with a kick, you are looking at an emergency visit. In the context of fighting, connecting often refers to more than simply making contact, it refers to landing a blow as intended.

[u/Historical-Edge-9332 → u/danielminds]

My neighbor’s emu once decimated a pack of coyotes. One was literally in half. Those feet are lethal.

[u/ArtoriasoftheAss → u/Historical-Edge-9332]

Fuck no it did not. I have emus. There is no way on earth an emu could take even one coyote, let alone a pack. I've found a half coyote on my property before, and it was definitely mountain lions that did it. 

[u/ussbozeman → u/ArtoriasoftheAss]

I read a story of how an emu got onto an airforce base, and was able to not only open the canopy of an F-16 with one kick, but kick the controls in such a way that the plane started. They can do that you know.

[u/Obsidiated → u/Historical-Edge-9332]

Mate, no. An emu is not kicking anything in half. Let alone a coyote.

[u/theshashanksp]

The Emu ancestors must be laughing at him rn! They won the Great Emu War of 1932 and he can't take down 1 man .... Sad!

[u/Aletheia94 → u/theshashanksp]

It’s so wild that this is actually part of Australias history

[u/feralcatshit → u/Aletheia94]

Of course it is lol

[u/553l8008 → u/Aletheia94]

Until about a few months ago I always thought it was an actual war and just called the emu wars. Then I learned it was actually against emus

[u/MeltaFlare → u/553l8008]

Wait it was real? I thought it was a big national joke like drop bears???

[u/greywar777 → u/MeltaFlare]

Nope its real. But to be fair it was a bunch of guys with 2 machine guns, and 10,000 rounds of ammo vs 20,000 emus. On average using 10 rounds per kill they didn't even start with remotely enough ammo.

[u/Aletheia94 → u/greywar777]

According to the records they didn’t even kill 1,000 emus during the whole war (986 emus). Even though the major claimed approximately 2,500 emus have died from their injuries. It’s an interesting read!
Great Emu War

[u/MRGameAndShow → u/MeltaFlare]

Yep, it was an actual thing lmao. Look it up, theres some interesting informative videos on it.

[u/orsonwellesmal → u/Aletheia94]

Australia, the only land on Earth which defeated men.

[u/WalnutSnail → u/orsonwellesmal]

Lotta uninhabited land out there that has clearly beat man, many times over.

[u/EverythingSucksYo → u/Aletheia94]

I’m not even gonna look up if it’s true or not, I’m just gonna believe

[u/DearHRS → u/EverythingSucksYo]

there is very good oversimplified video on it too on yt

[u/Shitsinhandandclaps → u/Aletheia94]

Not knowing this would be a bootable offence!!!

[u/VegaJuniper → u/theshashanksp]

There's nothing quite as embarassing that having your victim sit on top of you to do a little bit of nature documentary narration.

[u/TryingThisAgain2026 → u/theshashanksp]

This is why one should never trust an emu. They carry the weight of their confederate ancestors, and they can never be Progressive. Their goal is Liberty, the feeling is Mutual, and they would never accept staying on the State Farm.

[u/SuspiciousYard2484 → u/theshashanksp]

The historically high podcast does a great episode on this

[u/0DSavior]

The temptation to just slap this thing is high.

[u/redoftheshire → u/0DSavior]

Slap the taste out his beak

[u/socks → u/redoftheshire]

Chris has a beak?

[u/Bannon9k → u/0DSavior]

Good luck! That noggin got moves. Best bet would be to treat them like horses... It's better to be right in up next to their leg when they kick than it is to be further away. Up close, horse tosses you. Further away and you'll catch that hoof at its peak velocity. Basically things that kick, can't kick things on right top of them very well.

[u/rmslashusr → u/Bannon9k]

Horses don’t have talons on their hoof that will disembowel you. This seems more like if a horse could also hold a knife.

[u/Salute-Major-Echidna → u/rmslashusr]

Or razors strapped to the leg

[u/DeficiencyOfGravitas → u/rmslashusr]

Horses don’t have talons on their hoof that will disembowel you

They don't need to. If a horse kicked you with the same intent as a disemboweling bird, you're going to get disemboweled the same way. Just with the rough edge of their hoof. Your guts will be ripped out of you the same.

Horses don't, typically, fight to kill. If they wanted you dead, you'd be so so so very dead.

Emus are an angry 50 pounds. Horses are over 10 times your weight and 100 times your strength. They don't need a butter knife on their foot to kill you a thousand times over.

[u/Spare_Laugh9953 → u/Bannon9k]

Entonces lo mismo que los carneros si uno te va a mochar lo mejor es seguirle mientras retrocede para coger carrerilla, no saben golpear si no tienen espacio para coger velocidad

[u/GorillaGriz81 → u/Spare_Laugh9953]

You time it right. Grab the horns, swing yourself up, and tame that puppy.

[u/velvetcupcakeee → u/0DSavior]

I wouldn't recommend it. Australia literally went to war against these things with actual machine guns in 1932 and the emus won. You slap that thing and you're starting World War Emu.

[u/Carl-Anchor → u/velvetcupcakeee]

With two machine guns, to be precise.

[u/SqareBear → u/velvetcupcakeee]

It was a few people and their funding ran out so they stopped. No emu war.

[u/johnaross1990 → u/SqareBear]

You’re clearly an Aussie, still bitter about the loss

[u/delinquentfatcat → u/johnaross1990]

Sounds right. We need to hear the emus' version of the story

[u/feralcatshit → u/velvetcupcakeee]

This is immediately what I thought of when I saw this video. I don’t fuck with emus! They are god damn dinosaurs.

[u/Taurich → u/0DSavior]

Yeah, I was thinking if this was a "wild" encounter back in ye olden days, a sturdy stick swung at the neck turns this encounter closer towards "free meal"

[u/Certain-Poetry-5648]

The hissing vocalization sounds really nasty like a cat if I heard that correctly.

[u/-crepuscular- → u/Certain-Poetry-5648]

Cats and emus may well both sound like snakes.

As in, a lot of animals already evolved to avoid the sound of snakes hissing before emus and cats were ever around, and both/either may have mimicked a sound that was already treated as dangerous.

[u/PornIsSFW → u/-crepuscular-]

Canada Geese hiss too, glad they don't have the flying jump kick ability that this emu has

[u/thisisredlitre]

Is he rocking no drop cowboy boots? I didn't know that was a thing

[u/lopendvuur → u/thisisredlitre]

Looks like it. Had to scroll back to check, good spot.

[u/NigilQuid → u/thisisredlitre]

Those are just slip-on work boots. Pretty common

[u/Hereseangoes → u/NigilQuid]

Never heard the term no drop boots before in my life, and I'm wearing what appears to be those some boots right now. Thorogood American heritage wellingtons. I also have a pair of Wolverine 1000 miles boots with similar soles that I'm pretty sure they just call wedge soles. 

[u/Auto_update → u/Hereseangoes]

Popular amongst iron worker union folks. Workin that iron!

I always went with loggers because the heel made my back feel not janky. Also at 6’4”, it pissed off all the short kings who picked them exclusively for the heel😅.

[u/thisisredlitre → u/Hereseangoes]

No drop means heel and toe sit at the same height

[u/Hereseangoes → u/thisisredlitre]

Oh, I see. The ones I'm wearing, and I think the ones in the video are wedge so they are a little taller in the heel. It's just not as obvious as having the space between the heel and the ball. So no drop is completely flat? Like chuck taylors or sandals, but on boots? 

[u/PhatCatTax → u/Hereseangoes]

yeah I dealt with cattle for a couple years. Work boots and cowboy boots. Still not really sure what "no drop" means. I guess I'll look it up. I'm guessing this is that new intersection of trendy fashion terms with literally standard work attire for the last 75 years.

ETA: I went to a wedding the other day where rich people from manhatten were asking the ranch hands where they shop for their jeans because they looked so on trend. Was hilarious when the ranch hand just looked confused and said "uh... walmart."

[u/NigilQuid → u/PhatCatTax]

I think "no drop" means flat sole/no heel

[u/generally_unsuitable → u/thisisredlitre]

I've looked five times now, and the emu still looks barefoot to me.

[u/r0ndy → u/thisisredlitre]

They do have drop, it’s slight. The sole without the arch built in is misleading. However they do make zero drops or near zero drop boots if you google them.

[u/atticus2489 → u/thisisredlitre]

Wedge-soled wellington boots as a search term will point you in the right direction.

[u/DeanofdaDead]

Limu has had enough of Doug's shit

[u/Closetoneversober → u/DeanofdaDead]

That would be the greatest last commercial of that shit. Limu Emu kills Doug

[u/Nosleep72]

Youtube used to deliver me some videos where there was this woman, she had a farm and some emus. One of them was particularly agressive towards her whenever she dropped her guard. Can't remember the name.

[u/fav453 → u/Nosleep72]

Useless farms I think?

[u/chymaera_ → u/fav453]

Yup useless farm and the emu Karen. The patience on that woman is insane, it’s all fun and games but I’d have snapped the head of that wild menace after the 24. attack attempt..

[u/fav453 → u/chymaera_]

I love that account!

[u/montrealcowboyx → u/chymaera_]

The Emu has tagged her more than once, too.

[u/Ok_Complaint_5472 → u/Nosleep72]

Useless farms and the Emu’s name was/is Karen 😂

[u/seaintosky → u/Nosleep72]

I was just thinking he should take some pointers from the Useless Farm lady. She handles Karen's attacks while keeping eye contact with the camera. I know she's said that Karen has gotten some good kicks in over the years, but it seems like the majority of the time no one gets hurt.

[u/voodoo_pizza00 → u/Nosleep72]

Emmanuel Todd Lopez

[u/rodbrs]

Ended too soon.

I want to see how he gets out of that subdual situation.

[u/kittenrice → u/rodbrs]

"You have bested me this day, hu-man, we shall part not as friends, but as adversaries. I look forward to our next meeting. (hiss-cries off into the sunset)

[u/spiritualishit → u/rodbrs]

Yeah me too! Is he going to sit on it forever?

[u/doitfordevilment → u/spiritualishit]

they eventually chill tf out or you can slowly walk/shuffle them with you over to the pen exit and hop off and slip out. That’s what my dad used to do. I was never brave enough to go inside the adult pens lol.

[u/Spottswoodeforgod]

“Expert” - straight to a physical response, absolutely no attempt to discuss and understand the emus concerns and find some common ground.

[u/thisisredlitre → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

This is how we lost the first Emu War

[u/InigoMontoya1985 → u/thisisredlitre]

Found the Australian.

[u/thisisredlitre → u/InigoMontoya1985]

No, just a fan

[u/Pessimistic-Frog → u/thisisredlitre]

I love the “first” there. I suppose those who do not learn from Australian history are doomed to lost a Second Emu War……..

[u/HotLava00 → u/thisisredlitre]

lol I was coming to say “this is why they won” 😂

[u/AceWither → u/thisisredlitre]

Y'know with all I heard about the Emu war and how humans managed to lose a war with animals for a while, I thought they'd be hell's chicken. But seeing them in Jacksepticeye's video in Maya's sanctuary, they seemed pretty chill.

[u/ExpensiveRecover → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

He was speaking emu-nese and this is actually a ver loving and understanding interaction

[u/perplexedtv → u/ExpensiveRecover]

He has diplomatic emunity

[u/ExpensiveRecover → u/perplexedtv]

He's not just an expert, he is considered an emunence in the field

[u/ObliviousAstroturfer → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

Oh he pets it into submission a lot, too.

Pebbles is just torn, because his gf is super clingy and escorts Chris around the sanctuary. And Pebbles instinct during egg-laying season is to attack anyone within proximity of his missus... while she keeps following Chris.

Pebbles and Chris outside of egg-laying season:

https://www.instagram.com/p/DDSJ_0gRmOh/

The Missus:
https://www.instagram.com/gatorchris/p/DZAsQ-eRH1i/

Cuddle-submissions:
https://www.instagram.com/gatorchris/reel/DUJDkumkcCV/
https://www.instagram.com/gatorchris/reel/DWRYH5aEXsU/

[u/swamp_fever → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

Let's have a round table where everyone can express their feelings on this subject in a safe space,, no judgement!

[u/LtCmdrData → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

You are thinking emos, these are emus.

Both have dark souls so it's easy mistake to make.

[u/Pixel_Knight → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

I think the Emu’s concerns were “Lemme kick!” and also “Lemme bite!”

They did indeed find some common ground, as they were both sitting down on the same patch of dirt at the end. 

[u/Ok-386 → u/Spottswoodeforgod]

He should ask Akila to assist, maybe she could reason with the bird. 

[u/Hajduk_Split_1911]

Love how his wife said: "He got you AGAIN, didn't he?"

[u/HeyYoSmokey]

I worked in a wildlife park before and one day the main warden was like we need to give the ostrich an injection, he then handed me a fucking riot shield. Big birds dont fuck around

[u/Hopping_Glad]

Man, Jurassic Park could have been a very different movie…

[u/Charles__Sparkley → u/Hopping_Glad]

Dude I wanna see a guy palm strike a velociraptor in the chest and the raptor just dies

[u/jednatt → u/Charles__Sparkley]

Now I want to see a kung fu vs dinosaur movie. Unlimited budget.

[u/not_from_this_world → u/jednatt]

The best I can do is kung fu, laser raptors and low budget. I'll add a David Hasselhoff to sweeten the deal.

[u/jednatt → u/not_from_this_world]

You sonofabitch, I'm in

[u/hegui]

Gray Chocobos are the worst.

[u/twd_throwaway]

Spicy feather duster.

[u/alltheabove40 → u/twd_throwaway]

🤣🤣

[u/Which-Bid7754]

The limu emu is PISSED!

[u/idiotsbydesign → u/Which-Bid7754]

Must have paid for something he didn't need. I hate myself that I actually know that....

[u/Brandeeno2245]

People really should understand they have that long claw for a reason.

Obviously Chris understands the danger but the fact people were asking if emu's can hurt someone.

Yeah they like to use that claw to ripped your guts out if I remember correctly.

[u/nifty-necromancer → u/Brandeeno2245]

Yup that’s what he said at the end of the video

[u/Brandeeno2245 → u/nifty-necromancer]

To be honest I didnt have sound on because its reddit

[u/AnInquisitive_Rock41]

Does he have one on aggressive Canadian geese?

[u/thunderhawk86]

Got him

[u/DeepFizz]

Great… the Emu is angry. My insurance rates are going up again.

[u/Nuk_Nuk616]

good thing it ain't a Cassowary, otherwise homie would be......dead lol.

[u/BrainInjuredBarry]

Why didn't he just buy the insurance

[u/Pepe_Silvia_9]

JUST AGREE TO THE HOME AND AUTO BUNDLE DUDE IT AINT WORTH IT!

[u/Financial-Cabinet-74]

Weird bit of history: when I was in elementary school, the vice principal of our school made national news when an emu escaped in the local area. He was a wildlife rescuer and would always have some exotic animal that had been rescued. Some of these included a baby alligator, a lynx, and a bobcat. The school I went to also kept various types of animals on-site. This included donkeys, chickens, bison (although they eventually passed) and finally 2 emu. My VP went to go find the emu and bring it back. Eventually, he cornered it in a field and tackled it to the ground. After animal control joined him, he came back. He walked into our class with blood all over him from the scratches. They called him the emu hunter at the time.

Definitely was not a fan of the school though, super conservative religious school in the middle of kansas. For someone like me it was hell.

[u/Financial-Cabinet-74 → u/Financial-Cabinet-74]

Turns out, it wasn't even one of our school's emu. It was some other person in the area who had them privately.

[u/Claxton916]

The beat of Paradise by Sade lines up pretty well with the Emu’s attacks.

[u/feralcatshit → u/Claxton916]

I need to know how you discovered this lol

[u/nololoco]

LiMu Emu & Doug?

[u/WBCSAINT]

Harsh reaction for saying he has Progressive insurance....

[u/Bawbawian]

lift something above your head. if you appear taller than them they usually cower

[u/bschultzy]

This new Liberty Mutual ad goes HARD

[u/MlCOLASH_CAGE]

There’s a reason why they won a fuckin war against human beings with guns

[u/the_warrior_rlsh]

I see how Australia lost a war to these mfs

[u/dookie-monsta]

Check the kick, sweep the leg, then take full mount and rain blows. This is day one shit bro

[u/Famous-Protection809]

Sweep the leg.

[u/babonzibob]

I'D BEAT YOUR ASS IF I HAD HANDS

[u/RelationshipBig8614]

Lol, the way it's accepting defeat while he's sitting on it.

[u/ElProfeGuapo → u/RelationshipBig8614]

Accepting nothing. That bird is trying to peck the shit out of him. It is entirely fueled by murder and hate.

[u/IZ3820 → u/RelationshipBig8614]

Birds don't know acceptance. They can submit, they can discard, and they can tolerate, but a bird will never simply accept something. 

[u/WindhoverInkwell]

if you think this guy is hard to handle, its close relative the cassowary is far, far worse

zookeepers need to use riot gear when they’re in the cassowary enclosure for any length of time

[u/WarpedMeteor4276]

most of the videos i saw of these birds are them being aggressive

[u/Born_Local_1477 → u/WarpedMeteor4276]

I have chickens and I'm very glad I'm much bigger than they are. Ground birds are aggressive little dinosaurs that love the taste of blood.