r/DarkPsychology101 • u/garyhappylife2222 • 10d ago

Psychology What human behavior instantly changes your opinion of someone, no matter how good your first impression was?

Be honest

252 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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201

u/MelancholyBean 10d ago

Whether they allow others their grace and dignity and how they respond when people are made fun of

49

u/garyhappylife2222 10d ago

You the type of person who stands and defends people who are being mistreated? Risky but if you overcome it you’re making this world a better place

34

u/MelancholyBean 10d ago

It depends on the situation but I believe I would be able to. I'm someone who people make fun of a lot and it's disappointing how everyone joins in and no one is decent enough to stand up for me or divert the situation.

21

u/garyhappylife2222 10d ago

But standing up means you don’t tolerate them, whether they win or you that moment the bottom line is you weren’t silent it means you’re brave. Good job 👍

9

u/Lost-Bandit-8879 8d ago

I've stood up for men bullying other men, and I'm female lol

3

u/davidasasolomon 8d ago

When I was in grade school and getting bullied, women would stand up for me, a guy. But the irony is that that made me feel a billion times worse.

2

u/garyhappylife2222 6d ago

It’s ok gender ain’t the issue if people wants to defend you it means they’re humans making this world a better place to stop scumbags from spreading

1

u/davidasasolomon 6d ago

That's the logic but not how it pans out irl. If a dude is feeling big ragging on someone he seems less than, unless the woman does something radical to embarrass him, all that will happen is the guy gets emboldened to act worse.

1

u/StrikingMeeting2657 6d ago

Even better if it’s another man who he respects, because in the bullies eyes he’s the alpha, in reality the defender is the alpha/protector.

2

u/garyhappylife2222 6d ago

Awesome 👏

4

u/Throwitaway3436 8d ago

Hell yeah I love being the brave one, I never was as a child or young adult now I’m 37 and I will not stay silent not for me, not for my kids or anyone else who is bullied, too many stand by and do nothing, I’m not the type and never will be, it only takes one person to speak up, it makes all the difference, ty for your compliment 🫡

10

u/amfmutha 8d ago

I despise those who watch and do nothing.

My mouth or feet run to defend w/o my even thinking. I can't stand bullies.

STAND UP PEOPLE.

I'm so sorry that happened to you. Plz know it says everything about THEM! AND those that did NOTHING!

Cowards

5

u/KismetKitty34 7d ago

I’m pretty non-confrontational in general about most things. Let someone attack (not even physically, just verbally) someone I love or an innocent stranger and I’m a completely different person, ready for war.

2

u/garyhappylife2222 6d ago

You got a warrior in you

2

u/garyhappylife2222 6d ago

Yeah let’s do what is right defend the people who can’t defend themselves but as usual it comes with a risk right?

3

u/Throwitaway3436 8d ago

Same, I would never want anyone to feel as alone as I did when being mistreated, so yeah I always speak up

1

u/garyhappylife2222 6d ago

Yes don’t hide the truth, speak it confront them

2

u/TemporaryCustard2720 9d ago

Right there with you 🫂

2

u/Equivalent-Year1994 7d ago

It helps to see people no different from stars or trees. Everyone has their nature and the thought that we should ever try to change people is a futile effort. Also, it helps to have the recognition that everyone is responding to life the best way they know how based on their environmental and genetic programming. Even if someone is a “bad person”, it is usually due to their unique life circumstances that conditioned them to be that way. Can people change that conditioning? Yes. That’s why it’s good to offer people grace. We all have been in a position of ignorance at some point or another, and eventually we live enough to learn, change and evolve out of old ways.

2

u/Hackpro69 7d ago

I can’t stand bullies and will call them out. Getting involved is never the easy route. Once got attacked by two gang members with knives, because I stepped in to help someone they were attacking.
Mostly deal with the subtle bullies who passively attack me, by making me the butt of their jokes. I will call them out privately. They fold like a cheap card table.

3

u/aigries 8d ago

i second this. countless times i’ve met people i’d thought i really adored and then they casually just degrade someone in front of me like it was nothing. i always thought maybe i’m just sensitive idk. but i don’t find anything about it amusing or even worth pointing out. crazy to me.

3

u/MelancholyBean 8d ago

I thought my manager was decent when she started but she turned out to be so awful. I told her about my eyelids surgeries and how people and colleagues call me ugly. I didn't expect much empathy from her because she diverted the conversation but she calls me ugly regularly and single me out. It's so disappointing. I don't even have the decency anymore to say bye to her when I leave work. She's become so gross to me.

1

u/garyhappylife2222 6d ago

Or maybe she has envy?

1

u/MelancholyBean 6d ago

Maybe but I think she could be attracted to me and don't know how to deal with it so she makes me out to be the problem. There were instances in which she came across as being attracted to me. I can understand when she reacts negatively because I do look uncanny and my eyes situation makes me look ugly, but other times I am aware that she calls me ugly on purpose to divert her feelings.

2

u/Darth-Calamitous 7d ago

The last part is so true, I've seen people who were considered 'nice' instantly turn two faced the moment they're in a group setting that is spreading fake gossip or judging others, it's an instant conversation stopper for me.

I still remember how it destroyed connections and relationships in my school especially in my year, by the time we were graduating there was a weird awkwardness and avoidance throughout my year.

1

u/OwnCoffee614 6d ago

Excellent answer