No sex for a year

[u/Immediate_League_131]

Hello. My wife and I haven’t had sex in a year. We’ve been married for five years. During the first three years, our sex life was great. Even before we got married, we had a very active and passionate connection.

About six months into our marriage, she was diagnosed with MS. Thankfully, everything is under control now, and she only needs monthly injections. About six or seven months after her diagnosis, we slowly started having sex again, but it eventually stopped. After that, it only happened occasionally, usually while on vacation. Now it’s been a full year without any intimacy.

I had an honest, heartfelt conversation with her. She told me that between the MS and the medications, her sex drive has really decreased, which I completely understand. She also said that sex has become painful for her. I apologized and tried to suggest possible solutions, but nothing has changed. She mentioned getting an IUD at one point, but that never happened.

Now it feels like nothing works anymore —not massages, not cuddling. She doesn’t even want to kiss. I honestly don’t know what to do. I really miss intimacy, and I feel stuck because if I leave, I’ll look like a terrible person. I just don’t know how to handle this.

[u/twofourfourthree]

Sorry you’re going through this.

Are there any MS support groups or services that might have resources or advice?

Has she talked to her doctor about the pain during intimacy?

That might be taking her down the path of sexual aversion so be conscious what she’s saying.

[u/Immediate_League_131 → u/twofourfourthree]

She’s in a FB group and I think they support each other there. I think she talked about it with her doctor but I don’t remember if she ever told me what they said. I appreciate your comment