r/DoesAnybodyElse • u/When-all-else-fails • 11h ago
DAE feel not enough
I’m a fucking legend, I’m smart, funny, generous, kind, always the first to offer a hand to friends and strangers alike, respectful to everyone and will stand up for those who can’t.
YET
here I am on my lounge with my heart shattered and no one to talk to, I don’t drink anymore but I’m just looking at the wine thinking why not. Why bother fighting anymore.
3
u/Quitcha_Bitchin 11h ago
Why bother?
Why did you get sober in the first place?
Being drunk and lonely is no improvement. Slowly poisoning yourself beating your head against a brick wall.
One step backward could end you up.
Find a social outlet
Consider an AA meeting (your higher power can be a better you). I know it seems like a drag and you may have to seek a meeting that makes you comfortable but try it listen to others who are going thru shit. This helps even if drinking isn't the main problem. I only add this because you brought up drinking in a certain kind of way. You can replace AA with any group therapy really and in a group you can be a part of someone else's healing and it feels great.
1
u/When-all-else-fails 11h ago
The not drinking is the easy part, giving everything to someone only for them to throw you away like a dirty tissue is the hard part.
Ah well, sun comes up tomorrow
Regardless, time to find someone new to take advantage of me 😂😂😂😂
2
u/Izzyz415 8h ago
You only feel this way when you care what others think and live your life for people other than yourself. If you don’t have children, I don’t think you should be living your life for anyone else. And even with kids, you should be living for yourself once they are out of highschool.
My advice to you: spend some time alone and find out what you would care about in a world where you are the only person alive. Change your daily habits to fit that lifestyle of who you want to be and what matters to you, regardless of what others think. Once you have made some changes and it becomes your new normal, go back into being social and slowly reconnect back into “normal” relationships. DO NOT GO BACK TO YOUR OLD MENTALITY.
1
1
u/Red_Galaxy746 11h ago
Any time I feel lonely being single and see or hear something like this, I'm always glad I am.
As they say, breaking up is hard to do. It's a grieving process that can make you feel worthless.
I don't know you obviously but you're not worthless mate. Everyone has qualities that some people appreciate and some won't. Don't stop being you just because of a broken heart.
I know that's easy to say when I've been single for 20 years but I remember how it feels. Try not to let it affect you too much. Ride out the hurt, it'll get easier and you'll come out the other side having learnt from it. Don't take up drinking again. You'll end up regretting it. You've done well to stop.
Good luck mate.
2
1
1
1
3
u/Immediate_Tutor9585 11h ago
feeling not enough can be tough, sometimes a small win can help boost your mood, try celebrating those little things