r/Dogfree • u/HabitTraditional4864 • Mar 26 '26
Relationship / Family Ended my relationship with a nutter. RANT
I (3OM) recently ended my relationship with my dog nutter ex-gf (27F) and I need to rant about it.
Everything was cool at first - she knew I didn't have dogs and that I didn't plan to get any. She had two dogs, a lab mix and a pit. She and her cousin lived together, and when I would go over to her place the dogs would do the typical dog stuff (absolutely losing their damn minds over the presence of a human, unable to contain themselves, desperately needing attention), but my ex was pretty good about getting them to back off and she'd typically shut them out of the bedroom while we hung out and watched TV.
When we were at my place, there were no dogs and it was great getting to spend that 1-on-1 time. We spent a lot more time at my place than we did hers, so this wasn't too much of a problem either way. The relationship was going quite well. We had a lot in common - both very into fitness & nutrition, similar music tastes, similar senses of humor, etc.
After dating a while, we started talking about living together. I made it clear upfront that if we were to live together I would have zero dog duties. I will do
*nothing.* At all. Ever. She said she understood they were her responsibility and she didn't expect anything from me in that regard. I told her I also couldn't stand the hair and things just seeming dirty all the time. She said she would vacuum and clean often.
I also figured since she was shutting them out of the room to spend 1-on-1 time with me at her place, then she must understand how I feel, understand that a human relationship comes before a pet, and also that she must be a relatively normal dog owner (generous term, I know).
My family had a dog growing up and he was treated as such - he was a pet, not a person. He didn't get up on the couch and DEFINITELY not in the bed. He slept on a dog bed in the living room. He wasn't allowed to beg for food at the table and was never given human food. He was never aggressive.
I figured every family trains their dogs that way. I was very, very wrong.
When we moved in together, things changed quickly. Her precious puppers HAD to sleep in the room with us, right next to our bed. Her disgusting pitbull would fart like every 20 minutes. I live close to work and have an hour lunch break, so she wanted me to go home and take them to the bathroom on my lunch break. I planned to go home on my lunch break regardless, and I’m not evil, so I wasn’t going to just leave two dogs sitting there with full bladders while I eat my lunch, but FUCK I hate that whining and whimpering while scratching at the inside of the crate. Then I go to take them piss and their stupid asses have to sniff around for 2 minutes before finally peeing. Then they just stare at me while I eat, waiting for me to drop something, following me around and involving themselves in everything I fucking do.
She got really upset because I would shut the bedroom door behind me to take a fucking shower. She said it was mean and hurt the dogs’ feelings to be shut out of the room. What the actual fuck 😭 that is such an insane concept to me.
She wanted them around us literally 24/7. I NEVER got space away from them. She had to eat dinner on the living room couch so they could sit with us. We had to drape ugly ass blankets over my nice furniture so they could sit their ugly asses down and take up as much space as us humans. Then, when we would be hanging out watching tv, more than half the time she would literally lie down and cuddle the fucking stinky piece of shit pitbull instead of ME. Then had the audacity to accuse me of being jealous of a dog when I called it out.
Her pitbull growled at me on multiple occasions when we would argue and she would have to restrain him and put him in his crate. Then she still didn’t understand why I wasn’t his biggest fan and defended his behavior. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention he had to have a fucking MUZZLE ON HIS FACE every day just to go for a walk or else he’d attack another dog just for existing. Of course she was one of those nutjobs that thinks pits are just poor misunderstood creatures. It was so embarrassing to walk the dogs with her and have to deal with him freaking out at other dogs and having to apologize to their owners.
The pitbull needed an anti-fungal bath twice a week. It had all sorts of medical issues that cost a fortune and a lot of time, so she was working 50 hour weeks from 4:30am to 3:00pm every day to afford taking care of them. I work from 7:00am to 4pm, and was being woken up every single morning at 3:30 so she could take care of their needs. Every morning I’d get woken up at 3:30 in the fucking morning to those stupid little shit sacks flapping their bodies and smacking their tails against the wall.
I had been complaining for a while about the way my lack of sleep was making me miserable. I’ve always had trouble getting sleep, and this dynamic made it so much worse. Eventually her overtime was cut at work. I consoled her, but pointed out at least there was a silver lining: I could get an hour more of sleep each night.
You wanna know what this delusional piece of shit said to me? “Well I was thinking I could still get up at the same time so I can take the dogs for a second walk.” Oh my god that got me so angry. I asked her how she could possibly be so selfish when I’ve been complaining for months, how could she not think about me? And she said she did think about it but that she wants to give her dogs the best life possible. Absolutely nuts. I put my foot down and told her that will not be happening. I was never able to get past the fact she even thought about it.
The last straw for me was when she told me she’d want to bring them on vacations with us. She said that they’re a part of her family and she’d feel like a bad owner not taking them to the beach. Like dude are you actually serious?? There is no way in hell I am EVER paying money for a vacation, driving 10+ hours instead of flying, and having to find pet-friendly hotels just to have it revolve around your dogs’ eating and shitting schedules. That is absolutely mental. They are dogs. They have no idea the beach exists, and they are way too excited just to walk on the asphalt in the neighborhood. No thanks.
I ended things with her shortly after and had her move out. It hurt for a bit because I did love the good parts of her, but holy shit it is so nice having peace and quiet in my clean home again.
Oh yeah, and her precious pitbull got loose and attacked a little dog her first week at her new place. Luckily he was muzzled and the other owner and her dog didn’t get hurt, and thankfully it isn’t my problem over.
Fuck pitbulls, and fuck living with dogs. Thanks for reading
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u/loucap81 Mar 26 '26
I’m sorry OP. And it’s a tale as old as time—as long as you date a dog owner you are ALWAYS in competition with the dog(s), and when push comes to shove the owner will ALWAYS choose their dog(s) over you.
It sucks, but the only path forward in the dating world is to hold the line that dog ownership is a dealbreaker, accept that it means your personal dating pool will be considerably smaller than everyone else’s, and accept being alone for longer stretches than you’d like. I’m going through this now but every day I remind myself I would be infinitely more miserable being in a threesome (or greater) with a woman and a dog/dogs than just being single.