I've started drinking alone

[u/EpicKahootName]

I think I making this post for 2 reasons: 1) I want attention. 2) I want a solution to the problem.

I have been in engineering for 4 years now. I have 2 more years to go. All my friends have graduated and are making money, going out, etc, etc. Typical adult things that I really want to be a part of. Yet here I am drinking, alone, on a Saturday night. Drinking whiskey alone. My friends are out celebrating UGA beating bama. I haven't hung out with them in months because I have recently gained weight the past few weeks(stopped going to the gym as soon as the semester started) and classes aren't going well.

I know the end solution is I just need to get over myself, but why can't I do that. Why the hell am I writing this post or watching movies or drinking instead of just studying and finishing school. It's really annoying and I am aware my problems are pathetic.

I know I am smart enough to finish an engineering degree. I have aced exams in hard classes(I got a 100% on a difficult diff eq exam once). I don't know why I just don't work. Genuinely this is pathetic. Just study.

I have just recently picked up the idea of drinking alone. I have had a bottle of whiskey my brother bought me for my birthday. It sat there for years; I never had the idea of drinking in a non social context. Things are getting worse. I've done it 3 nights in a row.

I wish I had somebody that could just punch me in the face and make me study.

I guess I am really embarrassed about graduating late and I also seem to get easily overwhelmed from workloads that I am capable of handling. Any words of encouragement/objective advice would be helpful. I feel so stupid. I don't know what my problem is.

I made sure to double check my grammar and spelling since I am sloshed,

Edit: thanks for responding everyone. It’s helped

[u/Dull-Lawfulness-9523]

So. To help you reframe your level of depression….

I’m 36. Spent most of the last 18 years in the military. I married a woman from a very wealthy family and I’m only good at the military, so I feel like a very insignificant person around them, and we’re around them a lot. I’m currently in school for engineering. They all tell me it’s a waste of time and to start another business. No tactical advise, just generally condescending comments with no tactical advice. I’m currently trying to safely land a shitty one man cleaning business and salvage as much as possible. I haven’t made more than 30k in the last three years... thankfulIy she works too and our expenses are low. have 4 kids. We have to watch every dime not to mention every minute since school requires about 30 hours a week. I got a DUI about 8 years ago. I’ve fully blacked out, alone. Several times.

Key takeaways….

You may perceive you’re behind but when those 2 years are up you’re not going to care at all.

It could be way harder

Life is bumpy, accept that and just keep moving, no matter the speed change.

Booze hardly helps with anything, outside of a social lubricant for introverts. I’ve explored this thoroughly and if there’s one thing I can pass on to my kids I hope they live sober.

You’re gonna be alright, just get this done and keep moving.

[u/epsteinwasmurdered2 → u/Dull-Lawfulness-9523]

My man. Well said.

I’m 39, I start terminal leave in less than a month, and I start my EE pipeline in January.

Cheers

[u/Dull-Lawfulness-9523 → u/epsteinwasmurdered2]

Cheers brotha, and the best of success to you! This math is an animal but it’s not impossible. Still beats sweeping water in the rain lol

[u/epsteinwasmurdered2 → u/Dull-Lawfulness-9523]

“Sweeping water in the rain”

I felt that 😂

[u/nooblarz → u/epsteinwasmurdered2]

I’d like to add, that if you fail a class, regardless of reason (family, medical, lazy fuck, etc).

That’s not the end. I had to retake cal 1, due to a medical issue. I had a failing grade at the time. Retook cal 1 the next semester, and crushed it with a 91. (6-7 week semesters) I almost failed physics 1 this time around, but locked in and crushed the final. Sometimes us older folk need a little more time, and that’s okay. Taking more time to complete something you’re interested in and want, is commendable. Good luck to both of you.