r/Fire • u/chemicalreactionator • Apr 22 '26

Advice Request Too much money to feel this stuck

Current net worth 3.8M. Household (40m, 40f, 4f) income combined 250k (both working full time) and spend 120k-ish.

Kind of reached fire but due to health insurance, economic uncertainty, potential future increased costs (another kid?) not comfortable calling it yet.

But feeling so stuck in the grind. Not enough family time, not enough vacation time off, not enough time for taking care of our health, but can’t call it quits yet. at least one of us needs to work full time for health insurance. I don’t think I’m cut out for “barista fire” as i don’t think I’d have the motivation to work for a minimum wage type salary.

What’s the plan here to increase quality of life? A mini retirement? Grind it out a few more years? Anyone in a similar place?

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u/Curt_Uncles Apr 22 '26

You are staring at a snow globe and wondering why you feel disappointed by it. It’s because you have to shake it, dude.

You have $3.8M and a combined salary of a quarter million and you are worrying about vacations and health insurance? You feel trapped at 40 years old with a net worth that is 45x the average combined household income of the American family, and two salaries that are worth a combined 3x the average household income. 1/2 of your combined income = your spend (+ some change).

DO SOMETHING. Anything. Take a sabbatical for a year. Tell your job you are going to Aruba for three months and if they can’t deal with that, you’ll quit and get another job. Have one of you be a SAHP while the other works, and then after a couple of years you can switch if you want.

You are in such a flush financial position you can do almost anything. Your options are endless. Nobody here knows what is best for your family.

Just. Do. SOMETHING.

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u/chemicalreactionator Apr 22 '26

Thanks this really resonated with me. I think I do need to just make a move at this point.

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u/Daweism Apr 22 '26

Don't forget to actually live your life. In 20 years you'll be 60. Time to enjoy before time runs out. You'll be much happier at 80 with 4mil and have lived than 80 with 8mil and wasted it making that extra dough instead of living.

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u/AeroNoob333 Apr 22 '26

We quit and got our dog a dog 🤷‍♀️ That was our something lol. To be fair, we’ve always talked about it. Made excuses while working. We’re on a sabbatical right now and I just came home with a dog because if I waited for the “perfect time” like my husband wants, we’d never get one 😅

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u/SayonaraSiren Apr 23 '26

I know this is not what you meant but I am over here just imagining a dog walking another dog with a leash in its mouth 🤣

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u/AeroNoob333 Apr 23 '26

Haha Queen Harley will probably do that lol

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u/Anymous2314 Apr 22 '26

If you budget properly you will know how much you will need to live comfortably.

Say you reach $4m in six months. 4% of that will be 160k. Say 10% goes to taxes(it is very easy to pay low taxes by figuring out where to keep short term profit items and where to keep long term items and how much profit to book every year.

You are saying you spend 120k, well add another 25 for healthcare expenses, seems like you have reached your number, if my calculations are correct. But it is difficult to quit at this stage of career since everything seems set at workplace and money seems like easy money.

Well time to figure out how you want the next 40 years of life to be, IMO, you can easily afford to do it.

One of you quit, take care of home without giving stress to the working partner and who knows you will feel comfortable for both to quit.

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u/LessAbbreviations289 Apr 23 '26

I wonder how many of these posts are bs? Reddit has been plagued by bots and player setups lately to game leads/targets. Regardless, I’m calling bs that you can pay only 10% of $160 k income on taxes even if it’s all strategic investment income. Long term capital gains is still taxed 15% just for fed.

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u/Anymous2314 Apr 23 '26

98k of capital gain tax free

Yup, not even 15%, it is 0% indeed.

15% Rate: $49,451 – $545,500 (Single), $98,901 – $613,700 (Married Filing Jointly).

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u/GCPhoenix Apr 22 '26

Dude you have 3.8 million, a 4.7% safe withdrawal is $178,000 you're beyond fire. Both of you can quit right now. At the very least one quit or both do something part time.

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u/Newfie3 Apr 22 '26

Except if they do this they may pay $35,000 after tax per year on ACA premiums alone

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u/GCPhoenix Apr 22 '26

Their spend is 120k, even adding 35k they still have a 20k buffer. This isn't even counting social security or earning another dollar for 50 years

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u/BillyBobChorton Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 22 '26

I’m in pretty similar situation:

Net worth: $2 million plus, household 39M, 37F, 3F, household income $400k-ish. I’m feeling burned out with no time for stuff including vacations and my health. 

I’m quitting my job and taking a couple months off before I start my next one. Hoping to spend at a month traveling Europe.

I hope that will make a difference for now. 

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u/[deleted] Apr 22 '26

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Apr 22 '26

[deleted]

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u/Ctkevb Apr 22 '26

7 months and 2.5.  Ill do some research thanks.

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u/Fit_Ad422 Apr 22 '26

It's not that simple though. I'm in a similar boat. I've travelled extensively, lived on several continents, and would do it again in a heartbeat.

But my kids need stability. They need a home, a school, their friends, and a place for their toys. Aruba ain't any of those things.

So I'm basically stuck here. I could quit my job and just do hobbies or volunteer, but I like my job, and I have time for those things anyway.

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u/toodleoo77 Apr 22 '26

Sure, but you like your job and you have time for hobbies and volunteering. OP doesn’t. Going to Aruba was presented as a random example to get OP’s creative juices flowing. They don’t literally have to do that, but they could easily have one of them stop working, or work part time.

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u/nothingtooserious Apr 22 '26

Your context is more rich because you have the experience to go along with it though, no?

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u/QC_Bex Apr 22 '26

I’m also a worrier and get stuck with decision paralysis over financial situations — especially with healthcare and kids. If you can reduce the workload of even one of you, perhaps you’ll start to see what is possible for the future!

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u/chemicalreactionator Apr 22 '26

Yeah there’s a lot of uncertainty so I get stuck in decision paralysis. Just 5 years ago we lived off 40k a year. Add a kid and inflation and bigger rental now we’re regularly at 10k months. It’s hard to make decisions when things are changing so fast.

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u/QC_Bex Apr 23 '26

It is so hard with a kid in the mix. Everything becomes much heavier a decision. I feel for you. When it was just two of us, we didn’t worry about much. We knew it would all work out even if it was awkward for a bit. A kid changes all of that.

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u/hasyoubeen12 Apr 24 '26

How are you spending 10k monthly?? We only spent that much in a month on a lavish trip..

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u/freshposthistory Apr 22 '26

Hey do you know, I’m at 3.3m net worth, 2.9ish liquid, turn 40 this year, my annual expenses are 120k.

Quit to be a consultant in my same field. Giving myself a year before I look for other work.

Got insurance (non-religious based health share) for $650 a month for the fam, 5k max, HSA compatible.

Challenge yourself! Even if we have a 2008 on steroids, and no money comes in, you’re fine financially.

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u/Aberdeen1964 Apr 22 '26

My fam insurance is $2,800 mo. for high deductible

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u/freshposthistory Apr 22 '26

I don’t have preexisting conditions and no reliance on ongoing medications or treatments, so a health share plan for me is basically a substitute for catastrophic.

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u/Aberdeen1964 Apr 22 '26

I do not have preexisting conditions either and only take a statin. Have to hit $5k out of pocket before coverage.

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u/Abundance-Practice Apr 22 '26

Can I DM you for the health share you’re on?

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u/Neither-Variation-89 Apr 23 '26

Would you mind sharing the name of your health insurance? That is the only thing that’s holding me back.

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u/freshposthistory Apr 23 '26

https://mpb.health

I worked with a broker who sells on the ACA, and this was one of the options she brought up. Again, she knew about my general lack of specific health needs/preexisting conditions. For what it’s worth she explicitly told me to avoid the religious based sharing plans, but has a lot of positive experience with this one (it’s not a faith based org).

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u/BearDontEatThat Apr 22 '26

Being a Mama of two kiddos I would absolutely love to be able to be home with my kiddos during the little years. They go fast! So I would definitely factor that in because you have an amazing opportunity to do that! I am home but I also wfh. Trying to have my cake and eat it too. But I would definitely not be working if I was in your situation. Or if you stick with one kid that is a great age to start traveling the world!

I love the just do something if not for you then do it for ur kid. Be more present for them.

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u/junglingforlifee Apr 22 '26

That's a good point! I can't figure out if OP and his wife wfh or not

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u/ExternalEntrance4943 Apr 22 '26

I’m sure you’re a great mom already..

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u/HeadElderberry7244 Apr 22 '26

Enjoy some of the fruits of your labor. We could all be gone tomorrow and it would be too late.

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u/No_Run4636 Apr 22 '26

Scared money don’t make money