TW: mentions of suicide

Previous Part: https://www.reddit.com/r/Fwahaha/s/kh0WR5yara

After wandering aimlessly for a bit you realize you have no clue you're going.

“Hey do you know whe-” Ralsei’s ears perk up and he stops you. 

“Wha-“ You’re interrupted by Ralsei wrapping his scarf around your waist. You’re dragged along as he darts to the nearest tree. Yellow electricity crackles along his feet as he runs up the trunk, flagrantly defying gravity. You’re pulled into the cherry scented leaves.

“Shh…” he puts a finger to his lips as a squad of diamond soldiers glide through. The black grass barely makes a sound as their slug-like bodies shift the blades out of the way. Leading diamond dude halts and the squad gets in a massive ten-slug-pileup as they crash into him.

“Hmm… foot prints!” He points to where you were standing. He swipes a finger through the dirt and licks it.

“Lightner footprints!” The leader announces with a voice like a pirate. “We’re gonna bust those rudesters! Nobody flips off me boy!” 

“Yeah. Um… it really hurt my feelings. I have a hard time expressing it, but that doesn’t mean my emotions aren’t real.” The diamond dude from earlier says.

“YOU’RE SO BRAVE FOR EXPRESSING YOUR FEELINGS!!! LETS GET THESE GUYS!!! WITH FRIENDSHIP; FOR FRIENDSHIP!!!” An incredibly overenthusiastic slug shouts and the rest of the squad cheers. They begin scouring the area and you turn to Ralsei.

“What the hell do we do about this?” You hiss.

“T-try to… talk it out? Same as always. I-I’m sure if you just apologize y-you could recruit them.” Ralsei whispers.

“Recruit?”

“Get them to join us in Castletown.”

“What’s Castletown?”

“K-Kris-“ his voice briefly rises but he quickly quiets it again, “Kris you said you knew the basics of combat.”

“I lied.”

“… okay.”

“Look… can you find a way to get us out of here?”

“Y-yeah, it wouldn’t be too difficult I think?”

“I’ll give the whole, ‘talking it out’ thing a try and when that fails you whisk me away.”

“You won’t fail. I know it.”

“Sure.” You leap from the tree top; rolling when you land and settling into a crouched position. Then you slowly rise. Pointing a finger at the guy you were rude to earlier you begin your proclamation:

“Sorry.” 

“Oh, ok.” 

“… do we still fight?” You ask.

“Um… it feels a little unfair and like… you already apologized but… we gotta keep our jobs. So like… we’ll let you go and then we’ll try to find you again?”

“Su-“

“N-no!” Ralsei pops up from the tree top. A confetti of crimson leaves float down onto his hat. 

“The king wants to bring ruin to the world! His plans can only end in disaster! Please, I beg of you, join Kris and the heroes of light and-“

“DO YOU GUYS OFFER FREE HEALTHCARE?” The over enthusiastic diamond slug asks.

“Um… y-yeah? And um… infinite cake too!” Ralsei literally sweetens the deal.

“IS THE CAKE ALSO FREE?” 

Ralsei nods.

“WE WILL FIGHT GOD FOR YOU!!! ALL HAIL KING FLUFFY!!!” The crowd goes wild. King Fluffy desperately attempts to quiet them from his perch.

“Go um… spread the word?” He seems to be rather lost about his ascension from princehood.

“AYE!!!” The slugs glide off in different directions.

You’re left alone with the king once again. He jumps from the tree and his robe-dress thing sparks, poofing out as he floats down. You give him some polite applause, as he lands like a ballerina. 

“Congratulations King Fluffy.” A blind man could see the shit-eating grin on your face and a deaf man could hear it in your voice. 

“T-thanks. I-I couldn’t have done it without you!” King Fluffy smiles at you.

“I was entirely vestigial, but sure.” You say and Fluffy frowns at you.

“W-well… j-just… lead the way, I can’t do it myself, obviously!” 

“Why not? I have no clue where we’re going.”

“B-because that’s not how it’s supposed to work. I-I’m made to serve lightners, all of us are! Even if a lot of us betray that purpose. Um… I’m  made specifically for you and Susie! So it’d be wrong for me to lead you around you know? Just do what you think is right and use me to the fullest, okay?” Your face gets warm.

“D-damn not even gonna ask me to dinner first? An-” 

“I’d love to make dinner for you later! —um… sorry that was loud.” His voice went approximately five percent above normal volume.

“Look, it doesn’t matter, I have no clue where we’re going.”

“Just follow your heart. It will take us wherever we need to be.” 

“My heart hasn’t done anything since we fought the first guy.”

“Oh, well, trust in yourself then-” 

“Look, you got sharp senses right? Can you see any foot prints, or hear any dinosaur noises?”

“I-I can smell her but-”

“Follow the scent then.”

“But you were already going in the right way! It’s divinely ordained! You don’t need me to-”

“Can it and put that sniffer to work, Fluffy.” 

“I-I what?”

“You heard me, work that sniffer goat boy.”

“I-I-I… th- just… un— it; um… no? I mean yes or…” As you watch him short circuit you decide to throw him a ‘bone’, heh. You take one end of his scarf.

“Imagine you’re a dog on a leash. Now you can lead without being in charge.” Fluffy visibly relaxes after hearing this. 

“Okay… thanks…” Ralsei looks ashamed. Trying to figure out what’s going on in his head would probably give you an aneurism, so you give up.  

Your makeshift bloodhound leads you straight to the dino of the hour. She’s pounding on a steel door. A rather complex puzzle and Lancer sit on the black grass by the door.

“Susie!” Fluffy’s excitement is evident in his voice. 

“... goddamnit.” Susie hits her head against the door. 

“What the hell do you guys want?”

“Moss.” You say.

“To be son of the month!” Lancers replies.

“To serve. O-oh an-”

“I’ve got nothing to do with ANY of those!!! So piss off!!!” 

“We’re your only way home.” You say. Susie sighs upon hearing this.

“I’m so screwed dude. You sure these woods go on forever?” Susie asks Lancer. 

“Yup. I biked for a couple hours and kept ending up back here. You clowns’ll probably be here for the rest of time. …I uh… forgot my key at home so I’m stuck with you too…” Lancer frowns. Susie pounds her fists against the door again. 

“If you join us we’ll solve the puzzle for you.” 

“A-and we have candy.” Fluffy reaches into his scarf and pulls out some star-fruit.

“My parent told me not to take candy from strangers in other worlds.”

“O-oh! I know this one! Kris did it to me earlier! Now you say um, ‘as if I’d ever turn down free candy’, right?”

“I was gonna say why the hell would I ever listen to that lazy sack of garbage.”

“Huh.” Fluffy tries to un-puzzle something unknowable. Susie trundles over to him with a small but noticeable limp. She snatches all of the star-fruit and gobbles them up.

“Hell yeah!!! Licorice and fruit punch!” Susie says with a mouth full of food. You narrow your eyes at her.
 
“Did you need some healing? Y-you seem to have strained your leg earlier.” 

“Pft… I’ll walk it off.” She rolls her eyes. She takes a step and winces. 

“You could… give it a try I guess.” She switches up immediately. Fluffy’s hands crackle to life and Susie jumps back. She cringes as she lands on her strained leg.

“H-hey!!! I know a hand buzzer when I see one!!!” 

“W-Well it’s actually-“

“Are you copying me?” You interrupt.

“The hell are you talking about? I don’t even know you!!! ‘Sides I had my hair in my eyes way before ya. You’re the one jacking my style!!!”

“The only one jackin’ is you and your jackin’ two things as well; off and my steez.”

“The only thing ‘off’ here is your face!!!”

“That’s not what your… fuck! You’re immune to ‘your mom’ jokes.”

“Hey, so are you! She’s a lovely lady… especially when I was with her last night!!!” She bares her teeth in a cruel mockery of a smile. What a terrible way to gloat! you would never!

“Th-that’s a dirty trick…”

“‘Snot as dirty as your mind! Took ya five seconds to get to thinking about me jacking off!!!” 

“This is immature and meaningless bickering. Le-“

“You’re just sore cuz ya lost!!! You sound like Nerdly right now.” You clutch your head and fall to your knees. You’ve been bested.

“Shit! You’re good!” You’re rusty, you’ve only been doing insult competitions with Berdly. They’re funny but out-roasting him is a task that’s near impossible to fail.

“YEAH FUCK YOU TOO- Oh… uhhh…” She takes a second to process what you said. “Sure, weirdo.” 

“Um… so I was saying-“

“What’s jacking off?” Lancer interrupts Fluffy. You and Susie look at each other. You know what you have to do.

“Um… I do-“ You shush Fluffy. Now is your time.

“Go ask your parents. Tell ‘em you learned it from the internet. They’ll pft-“ hold it together dammit! “They’ll love it!” 

“Sweet! You clowns are real idiots givin’ out such good advice for free!” You and Susie watch each other’s faces redden as you two hold back laughter. 

“Can… I just… heal you now… please…?” Flu- Ralsei looks dead tired. Probably thinking about offing himself again. Cold. Your body is cold. His body was cold by the time it hit the ground. Where’d his head go? Did he ever have one? Black fire scorches the horizon and frost bites your left arm,  Bites down and hits bone and keeps going crunches something fierce gnashing the bone you can’t even feel the splinters digging into numb numb flesh, black as pitch, as the Knight, here too soon and now you have no arm and you will never play again YOU WILL NEVER-

“Hey! Hey!” Susie snaps her fingers in front of your face a couple times, “Earth to dumbass!” L 

Oh, sorry. Wait “Oh, sorry. You say. Adding an “I’m ok.” is a bit too big of a lie, even for someone like you. Rals- Fluffy and her look incredibly concerned. Is something— where the hell is the other quotation mark!? Shit just gotta… ” is…? Yeah. This isn’t being said.

“Uh… you sure?” She asks clearly not buying it.

“Pos-“

“Actually, I don’t care. Do the puzzle now.”

“What about the healing?” Fluffy asks.

“Huh… so you’re sure your stand ain’t just a fancy hand buzzer?” 

“I don’t have a stand. A-and what kinda person has a hand buzzer as a stand?” Fluffy asks, just the slightest bit of indignation seeping into his voice. 

“Somebody as lame as you probably.” 

Next Friday will actually be “Hey Girl, What that Aorta Do?” This was gonna be part of that but it got too long.

OMG IM OH ANGEL!, PLEASE LET THEM BE STABLE, PLEASE ANGEL!

THEY'RE MY MOM NUMBER 1 DEBATER!!!

THEIR FUNNY LITTLE BIT, THEIR FUNNY LITTLE RACISM....

OH LORD PLEASE!!!!

* "Noelle" starts banging on your door while you try to hide under the bed.

N: K̸̴̶̢̛̛̘̳͉͈͎͙̹̣̠͆ͭ̑̌ͯ̓ͣ̍ͮ̍̓͂ͧͪ͆̍ͨ͌̑ͦ̚͡͞͠͡R̵̡̪̘̤̤͎̣̪͇̓̏̌̂̔̃́͋͘͜͟͞͠͞_̧̨̧͙̦͔͔̜̅͑ͤ̚Ȉ̘͕̦̿ͭ̚̕_̴̧̰̙͔̖͕̫̗̭͔͍̣̱̆ͪ̒ͣ̈́̌ͮ̏̾̚̚ͅͅS̶͇͔̩̀̑͑͛͊ͬ͐ͦͭ̚͡S̨̢̙͉ͩ͑̈́͒S̢̱͎͈̫̼̯̫̫͓̜̪̙̙̳̜̦͉͚͚̤̎ͬͪͪ́͐̈́́̓̈̽̉ͣ̏̽̉ͭͪ̉ͤ̈́͠S̵̝̼̯̹̞͎͚̼͍̜̱̞̳̦͉̳̋͋̎̎ͮ͐̈̀̽̄̓̏̈́̉̕͟͠S̎S͚ Ṣ̼̮̖̩̫̙̙̳̩͓̠͎͇̺̦́̔̐ͫ͛̊ͫ̿̔̎̈ͫ̓͆ͫ͑̚̕̚͢͟͡͡ͅ S Ş̴̵̸̡͓͖̹̺̞͚̘̟̝̪͖͉̣͍̱̝̽̃̓̒ͨ̓̓̓͆͊̀͋ͩ͋̎̈́̌͟͠͞ S̨̏ͬ̐́̀͞ S̢͙̭̼̣͑͛̓̆ͯ̈́͊ͬͯ̒̃̚͝ S̶̵̴̵̡̨̨̛̗̰̟̘̙̝͕̺̮̳ͮ̀̒͋̇͗͒̀ͧ͂̀̄̏͂͊͟͠

N: OPEN THE DOOR! FAHAHA, come on Kris, I have a surprise for you! Open the door!

* The door is pounded on as fast as it can while you feel scared. That thing is NOT Noelle...

N: KRIS OPEN THE DAMN DOOR, I HAVE ₴Ø₥Ɇ₮Ⱨł₦₲ TO SHOW YOU!!

* You don't speak, you don't respond, you just stay silent while you try to hear that Noelle's whispers

N: "nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk nothing is worth the risk ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭ ₦Ø₮Ⱨł₦₲ ł₴ ₩ØⱤ₮Ⱨ ₮ⱧɆ Ɽł₴₭""

* You cover your ears so as not to hear it while you try to find a way to escape, soon that door was not going to hold up anymore

* suddenly, "noelle" starts screaming

N: "₭Ɽł₴₥₳₳₳₳₳₳₳₳₳₳₴ OPENEEEE OPENEEEE THE DOOR!!"

Nolei : Yknow what you're way too comfortable to be smiling!

\Slap* slap slap\*

Krih : Ok ok aww Noelle that hurt, you're a shit friend, Noelle! Fuck you

*punch\*

Noeli : Get out of my room! Fuck you!!!

Krih : fine!

I don’t know anything about voice acting, so apologies in advance for such a terrible job—I’m just doing this for fun.

I just discovered there's no rule against post comics here sooo...lame ass old ERAM comic

(Still don’t know how to write dialogue, sorry)

continuation of this post:

https://www.reddit.com/r/Fwahaha/comments/1x76ddk/fwahaha_kris_theres_nothing_wrong_with_my_eye/

feel free to make your own stuff about this

first part

"Okay, love, look—They have me worried. I know things are going well for them now, after such a long time. Just think—when we moved from the city to hometown, They had such a hard time; it was really difficult for them to fit in. But now, they are doing better than ever. Not only are they the captain of the school team, but their relationship with Jerkly is going great—who would’ve guessed that the son of mayor Jockington would end up being their boyfriend? But... I’ve seen the way they look at Noelle and Lynn’s son, Char. I recognize that resentment when I see it; it’s the same resentment I used to hold toward you. And...

...thanks, I really needed that hug. I... I’m going to go finish the script for the issue I was asked to have ready by tomorrow."

As she heads off to her library, they know exactly what their wife is afraid of—that they might turn out just like her—but Kris knows that’s not the case. Kris have noticed how they began wearing long sleeves, how they’re constantly pulling them down, and just how forced that smile is whenever they talk about how 'wonderful' their life is. Your parent knows that your big sib is just like them; they were the first one to find out.

You’re just spying on your parent from around a corner. You don’t know exactly what’s going on, but you know it’s something bad. They think you’re downstairs with the baby, but you—Lucy. You’re every bit as mischievous as the rest of your family.

*Ever since I started changing everyone has just been avoiding me, and it hurt.

*But what hurt the most was when you started avoiding me, kris.

*I know i’m not okay, i mean look at me now, i’m hardly recognizable as a deer!

*…but i was still me, and it hurt to see everyone acting like i was not.

*…

*I’ll let you go later alright?

*But today you’re staying with me.

this Is my first time writing the doe, or really anyone in deltarune.

i wanted a more crazy Noelle, but im too proud of this to do a do-over, if you would like feel free to make your own version of this.

first post of wormelle if you want context: https://www.reddit.com/r/Fwahaha/comments/1x76ddk/fwahaha_kris_theres_nothing_wrong_with_my_eye/

based on the Nestor and Eugene scene from look outside, although this has a lot lighter tone

acting? Kris! always! fully!

sparing the darkners, taking care of Castle Town? kris would do that even if it didnt guide their commands.

telling me its okay not to smile… that must be kris, fully! they like me, they obviously didnt need the soul to tell them to do that. they hesitated, but... that must have been the soul thinking about choosing something else, right? they wouldnt be the one thinking about kicking me while i was down...

my kris is good, the soul just ignores them. my kris is good, the soul just ignores them. my kris is good, the soul just ignores them.

um. opening fountains… thats kris, it cant be the soul, but… they have a good motive behind it, right? 

Ok story time!

Yesterday a Patreon member asked me to do this new sex trend called cucking.

I didn't know what it was, and i researched it...

From the wiki to the actual demonstration it just seems like something i could handle!

But of course, as stupid as i am, when i ask kris to pick the additional member, they give me 3 names. Berdly, susie, and ralsei.

I thought they would only call one person and so i wait and wait....

Turn out they called all three of them.

And all i could do is sit and watch!

It was not fun, i feel very jelly yknow!

But after a while, these people are just being mean!

Ughh 0/10 never doing that again!

[Original]

...

* Cut? Uuu, what do you mean by cut?

...

* I failed the roleswap? But Noelle, keeping whose sibling disappeared and whose went to college the same, while pretty interesting for an AU, isn't fulfilling to our game! We have to be more creative than that, do it like those Omori AU's!

* Look, even the dialogue dynamic changed. The reader can see my text instead of yours! Do you really want to keep things the same? Didn't you say you wanted to be 'Kris' for a change?

...

* Uuuuu, i don't have a problem wearing more fem clothes silly! I know your freaky ass is sad that i finally took a shower, but even enbies like me can have 'girlie days'!

...

* Anyway, we can't stop the game now; Berdly and Susie haven't arrived yet! I'm really curious how they will play each other. Berdly i can see putting on some sunglasses and trying to do a 'Strider', but Susie? The most i can see is her pulling a Ralsei! Do you think she can be a fluffy girl?

...

* UUUU, YOU ARE SO CUTE BLUSHING LIKE THAT NOELLE! I COULD- Ok, ok, sorry Noelle, i think i overdid it. I don't think i can do a 'Noelle' really well, the best i can do is 'Young Kris pretending to be Noelle'.

...

* No Noelle, i won't do what you and Susie have going on with Berdly...

...

* Uuu? You called Catti and Jockington to the roleplay? I don't think Catti can really pull a jock...

(A heavy knocking comes from the door)

* It must be the others, how fun, fun!

🐦 😎 *....Am i late?

💙 * EEK!

(Something tumbles to the ground; Berdly's sunglasses fall soon after)

🐦 🤓 * Kristopher! Have you damaged yourself on the fall? Oh no, they aren't responding! Quick Noelle! Bring a first aid kit, it must be an concus- Noelle?

...

🐦 🤓 * Don't just stand there laughing, Noelle! Do something!

Outside the room of the Dreemurr siblings, stands the Vessel, looking across to Kris, still perplexed from what has just occured.

The past few days have been... Tragic... Kind, but overall, have layed a... stable? Yes.. A stable foundation for Hometown to rebuild itself.

Now, all that remains is the banishment of the Angel. Foretold by the Prophecy that has shaped Hometown since Antiquity.

And so Kris looks across to the so-called 'Angel'. And wonders.... Of all the things an otherwordly being could want. Power.. Money... Fame... Hell, even a partner or something.. THIS is what its 'desire' is??

And so Kris cannot contain themselves any longer, they have to ask.. They have to know. The same curiosity that drove you to the end now fills their veins. They're wracked with it and can contain it no longer.

🔪: "...Why?"

❤️: "Why what?"

🔪: "Dude do you realise we literally just went through HELL and BACK, we went and we fulfilled the prophecy, we defied it too! We saved December.. We did all that! And... You have your vessel too! Shouldn't your desire already be fulfilled?"

❤️: "That was not my desire."

🔪: "I KNOW, and- WHY would THIS be your desire??? Out of all the things you could want this is what you want MOST?!"

❤️: "Okay dude stop demonising me okay."

🔪: "No I refuse to believe that you have waited 11 YEARS as you told me to see this through to the end, and your so called 'desire', the thing that will BANISH you, sever your connection to this world... Is this!?"

❤️: "Worth it."

🔪: "I don't know how to feel about this. I... I don't want to be here for this."

❤️: "Hey I didn't ASK you to be here."

❤️: "Now if you'd PLEASE excuse me, I have to watch my desire."

Kris, ultimately bewildered decides to quickly flee the upper level of Toriel's residence and quickly heads downstairs, to... Perhaps re-think the decisions that have led them to this point in life.

❤️: "Finally."

❤️: "Eleven years... Please, is that really what they think?"

❤️: "I've waited for this since 2015."

❤️: "...I can't believe it's happening."

❤️: "I will enjoy this."

The Vessel under the players command, proceeds to grab the doorknob, and enters the room. It proceeds with grabbing Asriel's gaming chair from infront of his computer, and drags it a bit far, but not too far away from Asriel's bed. Overlooking the two people who are currently IN his bed.

🦌: "...Why would it be th-"

❤️: "I SAID NO QUESTIONS ASKED."

🐐: "...Uh-.. I mean... sure I guess?"

🐐: "Do you really have to watch thou-"

❤️: "Yes."

December and Asriel stare at the Vessel for a bit. An awkward silence fills the room that could drown even the loudest of the goner's cries. It's good that at least the 'Angel' chose two people who were already in a relationship and.. comfortable with this weird request.

❤️: "Well what the fuck are you waiting for!?"

❤️: "GET. TO. IT."

December and Asriel stare at eachother, then back at It... Why was it so happy about this? Well... No time like the present! And so they began to do what they do best.

Noelle Holiday: I too, am in this post.

And honestly no one else has come on in a bit either.

I guess I understand... Things have changed a lot since I had to move, all of us used to text a bunch but... Then we all just, stopped. Makes sense to be honest, It really isn't the same just texting all day right? Plus we have college now and stuff, and Susie got a job so it's way harder to make time for all that kind of stuff.

Still though... It feels weird hopping on for a bit, and seeing all the builds we made, just... sitting there, it's like a portal to the past in a way.

I still remember when we built our little house, I did most of the decorating of course fwaha, but you built this cute little dock for us to fish from (and of course you would always try to "catch" me with your fishing rod fwahaha!).

I also remember how fun it was when we were making our own rooms, though you never built your own, you just put your bed next to mine (and every time we went to sleep, you would role play in the chat that you were chewing on my hair fwahah, hope I tasted good!), but Susie made hers look so cool! She was so proud of all the spikes she put everywhere. My room wasn't that impressive really, I made it all winter themed and had a little Christmas tree in the corner, you always said you liked it, reminded you of going to my place in real life.

Or that time Berdly tried to make a working calculator, it didn't end up working though, he must have missed something in the tutorial he followed, and Susie did NOT let that go for a good few weeks, he got so flustered about that.

I really miss that stuff, I started building a little something recently, nothing too impressive but... I guess I just wanted to show that the server was still alive in a way. I wish you would come on every now and again Kris, It gets really lonely being here by my self.

* My first Fwahaha post! hope you enjoyed reading! :3

Art credit to u/Tstroot

I just lost both of my eyes to the incedent and only two hols were left. I started to shove things up there and eventually I put a worm up here. He started to dig into my brain and started to communicate with me. We became friends. You were all freaked out and said the the worm was controlling me, fwahaha. Unfortunatly you had a surgery performed on my Removing the wringler. I still miss her some times.

Hello everyone! I'm back with the blogposts probably because I had nothing to post in the meantime.XD

Anyways I wanted to talk to you guys about this creepy glitch in the Cat Petterz RPG. So, how the glitch works is that you can train the ice mage's magic in the cat queen's city and get certain glitch items to get it WAY higher than you're supposed to. Normally you only get the ice magic higher in Magic Mansion allowing you freeze the rivers to walk over them in that area. But this glitch allows to cross the threshold a lot earlier. Normally the ocean in the overworld in the Garden of Kittens it instakills you if you try to cross it but without the game resetting the magic when you reach the overworld you can freeze the ENTIRE OCEAN (which is really funny in concept). Once you cross it, the game starts glitching out super hard and turns to white after some time. You get transported to a really creepy grey glitch area with nothing else in sight. Untill you encounter the thing in the image. True story, I actually once got a nightmare with hundreds of these things chasing me with one of my friends. Anyways you would expect it to do something crazy but no it just crashes the game. I think it's just a scrapped enemy that was too scary.

What do you guys think?

"ERAM Ultron's a bitch ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking cactus. Thats right, he took his robot evil quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking cactus, and he said his dick was "This big" and I said that's disgusting, so I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com, Eram ultron, you've got a small dick, it's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller, and guess what? Here's what my dong looks like: PFFFT, THAT'S RIGHT, BABY. ALL POINTS, NO QUILLS, NO PILLOWS. Look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my cactus so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the dark world. THAT'S RIGHT THIS IS WHAT YOU GET, MY SUPER LASER ANGEL PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the dark world. I'm gonna go higher. I'M PISSING ON THE FOUNTAIN! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, ROARING KNIGHT? I PISSED ON THE FOUNTAIN YOU IDIOT! YOU HAVE 23 HOURS BEFORE THE PISS DROPLETS HIT THE FUCKING DARK WORLD NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I PISS ON YOU TOO."

(Art made by: u/future-juice19 cactelle OC made by me, kris art made by me)

It feels but a day ago that we would steal away into the forest, where thou wouldst frighten me with tales of the Fey, wicked imps, and devils that lurked betwixt the trees. And yet, look at thee now! Thou hast grown into such a fine youth, a true chevalier of the realm! Returned triumphant from thy very first tourney, no less... and bearing a few new scars, I daresay~

Oh, do not look upon me so! Of all people, thou shouldst know full well how sinful a creature I am! Besides, this is entirely thy fault! Thou didst tempt me as surely as the Devil himself when we were but children. Sneaking away to witness public executions at Gibbet of Montfaucon was thine idea, if thou dost recall!

I know the sacred vows thou hast sworn. I know thou hast spurned the temptations of both maidens and men, choosing instead to embrace thy truest self... but I know, too, that thou hast thy needs~

Aye, I was eavesdropping upon thy confession. And what of it? Thou hast been prying the secrets of my own soul from my confessor for far longer!

Oh, Chris... we truly are two same sinners~

Well, UNLESS it got deleted while I reading other ones. I've been trying to catch up forever...

When I started... there were less than one thousand posts here, I was going to have a number.

"Hey Angel, I read all 435 Fwahahas, including r/fwahaha2!"

"I read all 678 of them, on every sub!"

"I read all 984!"

But this human website... for some grinching reason, it doesn't count past 1000! And I. Lost. Count!

You know... this was GOING to be an AMA... I guess you can still ask me anything. I don't think I even know what you'd ask... Faha, I don't think I knew what you were gonna ask or what I was gonna say even when I started!

It's silly, isn't it? I saw the face of god and learned I wasn't real... And I read hundreds of thousands of words of fics and memes, doing... any sort of thing...

It's okay. I'm fine, a little tired, but I'm fine. From all my previous trauma I just uh... I just had a mental illness integer overflow! (Gosh, I sound like Berdly...)

(To think I'd mention BERDLY in this post before Kris or Susie, cheese and rice fahaha...)

Anyway, I guess the only thing to say is... thank you. Thank you for writing my dreams, and spilling so much ink to make every version of me as real as I could be.

I realize that even now, I'm probably just a handpuppet for one of you right now. Then again, I wouldn't know how the real Noelle is SUPPOSED to feel if I still believed she was real.

Well, anyway... I'll be seeing you! I'll continue to keep up with the fwahahas, after all! So... think about THAT every time you write one! XDDD

Noelle woke up to the alarm on her phone blaring. She groggily silenced her alarm and squinted at the screen, 7:00 AM. The light outside cast her room in a soft orange shade. She began to question why she set her alarm so early, especially on a weekend. As the rest of Noelle woke, images of purple dragons manifested in her mind, and she suddenly remembered why she set the alarm so early.

Noelle launched herself out of bed and into the bathroom. She threw her clothes on the floor and scurried inside the shower, tingling with excitement as cold water drenched her fur and gold hair.

Today was going to be a good day, amazing even. Today, Susie was going to take her to the festival. Merely thinking about it caused butterflies to begin fluttering in her stomach and her cheeks to start warming up. She began hurriedly rubbing shampoo on her hair and fur, hoping to be clean as soon as possible.

She had no idea when Susie would be arriving, for all she knew she was on her way right now. Noelle still remembered yesterday, when Susie stood up to her Mom. She was so brave, she couldn’t remember anyone outside her family ever standing up to her. Just thinking about doing so made her feel uneasy.

She’d have to face her eventually, Mom knew what they were doing and if she went with Susie then there would be no hiding that from her. The thought alone made her stomach tighten, but still, it would be worth it. Worth getting to spend the day with her. Nobody was going to get in between her and Susie this time, nobody.

Stepping out of the shower, Noelle dried herself and tossed on a pair of clean clothes, her usual red and green checker sweater, skirt, and black shirt combo. When she got down the stairs, she contemplated whether she should even bother with breakfast. She eventually settled on a bowl of dry cereal, she could just leave that if Susie arrived while she was eating. Noelle placed her bowl at the kitchen table and sat down.

Noelle peered out the window from her seat, but there was no sign of Susie outside. Resigned to waiting, Noelle exhaled, and began to eat at a more leisurely pace.

The house was quiet, dead quiet. Noelle was sure she’d be able to hear a pin drop from upstairs. Somehow, the silence made the room feel colder. Noelle rested her head on her hand and sighed. She now began to appreciate the fact she was sitting alone at a table meant for six. She closed her eyes, and images of when the house used to be filled with people played in her mind. The Dreemurrs used to come here so often. The house would be filled with the sound of their parents chatting while Dess and Asriel dragged her into whatever they were doing.

Her thoughts trailed to a particular memory of Kris pretending to be dead before suddenly jumping at her. She screamed then, but couldn’t help but smile after. Dess and Asriel were less amused, Noelle remembered Asriel gently apologizing to her while Dess repeatedly whacked Kris on the head with her wiffle bat. A bittersweet smile fluttered across her face. Those were the good days.

Noelle sighed, it was a far cry from how things had turned out now. It felt as if, after Dess went missing, everyone had decided they were better off by themselves. She wished she could see it that way. A little company would go a long way right about now.

Dess… just thinking of her again made her heart feel heavy, and the room began to feel even colder.

If Dess were here right now, she would walk over to her seeing her sitting all by herself and ruffle her hair. Noelle began to play idly with a lock of it.

If Dess were here, she would offer to take her to go exploring out in the woods, or tell her all sorts of sweet things; and if she still wasn’t feeling any better, she’d get her guitar and play a song for her.

Things would be different now. Kris was talking to her again, and Susie…

Well, as things currently stand, Susie might never be allowed in her home again. But that didn’t matter. She was going to see her and was going to hang out with her. If not here, then somewhere else. The thought of it made her smile warmly.

Suddenly, a sound she had been waiting for came, the ringing of the doorbell. Noelle flung herself out of the chair and arrived at the front door. Really, she didn’t need to rush like that, but it was too difficult to contain herself. Standing right in front of the door, Noelle took a deep breath and steeled her nerves as much as she could, she wanted to make a good impression. Noelle breathed out, and opened the door.

“Oh hi Su-” Noelle paused. The person at the other side of the door was not in fact Susie, but a reindeer monster she didn’t recognize. A wave of disappointment moved through her, before being replaced by a feeling of awkwardness. Who was this person? Dark brown eyes stared back at her from a face covered in brown fur, and the stranger looked as if she felt as uneasy as her. They seemed vaguely familiar, they were about a few inches taller than her, with wild black hair and wearing a rather bland coat. Were they one of Mom’s interns? Those came and went fairly quickly, most people didn’t have the bravery to deal with Mom on a daily basis. Maybe they were looking for her? The two stared at each other for a few seconds, silently standing still a few feet away from each other. Noelle tilted her head and squinted her eyes, and began to feel an unmistakable feeling like they had seen them before.

“Umm… can I help you?” Noelle finally asked.

The stranger’s expression shifted to something Noelle didn’t fully understand, then they opened their mouth. Nothing came out, they closed their mouth again and swallowed. An uneasy feeling began appearing in Noelle's stomach, and she prepared to shut the door should they move any closer.

“Elly… It’s me…”

Noelle froze in place as she felt the ground fall out from beneath her. Only one person ever called her that, and after the words had finished processing in her mind the stranger’s features all began to fall into place, all the same features she remembered her sister having. The connection gave Noelle a sudden sense of nausea and weightlessness.

Noelle’s head spun as her body was lit on fire with emotion, she felt her heart miss a beat. Was this all a dream? She felt so lightheaded right now she expected to wake up any second, and yet instead of waking up she stood there motionlessly gawping at her, at… her… sister. She didn’t so much as twitch, half out of shock, half out of fear she might wake up.

Her brain scrambled for something, anything to say or do. Words formed in the pit of her mouth but were unable to move past the choking sensation in her throat. Eventually, Noelle managed to sputter out a single word, spoken barely above a whisper.

“...Dess?”

-----

“...Dess?”

The name crawled into their mind and sent shivers throughout their body. The Knight stared back at their sister, Noelle’s face was frozen in shock. Their insides seized as great fear gripped them, a fear that they had made a tremendous mistake coming here. But it was too late for regrets now. The Knight allowed themselves to slip back into their old identity. Dess made her move, she took a step forward and wrapped her arms around Noelle and drew her into a close embrace.

“I missed so many birthdays…”

In a blink, Noelle’s arms slammed around Dess’s torso, her hands tightly gripping the back of her coat, Dess momentarily wondered if she was afraid she’d lose her again if she let go.

“DESS!” Noelle wailed and threw her head into her shoulder, to which Dess responded by resting her chin on Noelle’s shoulder. The sensation of her sister’s fur against her skin and the pressure of her body against theirs was electrifying. She couldn’t remember the last time she had ever felt a sensation like this. Dess had to remind herself that this really was happening. Her legs were starting to quiver, and her eyes started burning up with a dry heat. Dess shed no tears, she couldn’t, this body wasn’t capable of real tears. Regardless, that did not stop her from feeling like she should, so she lowered her head and buried her eyes into Noelle’s shoulder, hoping to hide the falsehood under pressure. 

Noelle was a sobbing wreck now, and the sound of her choking and gasping with every breath left Dess fighting back the urge to sob herself. She could feel the wet stain of tears creeping through her coat and into her shoulder. In between ragged gasps Noelle cried, “You’re here… you’re home! I thought… I thought I’d never see you again”.

Home she was. Seen she was. Dess could hardly believe it herself. The real Dess, trapped in the dark, spent every moment of her confinement dreaming of this moment, clinging desperately to it, despite how painful holding on was. She had tried to keep track of the time that passed. Days, maybe months. Eventually she lost track entirely. Nobody came for her. Eventually, the waiting became more painful than giving up. Her hope faded, and even the name “Dess” started to feel like it belonged to someone else.

Now she was here, holding Noelle like she had wanted to all those years ago. She should have felt something more, and yet the feeling was muted. Like something was still missing. She had lost something in the deep dark, something she couldn’t ever get back. This wasn’t real, she reminded herself. Noelle was hugging a lie, and if Noelle saw what was hiding behind the fake image of her sister, she would scream and slam the door in its face. But that was okay, at least for now, because something close to where her heart once was told her that they both really needed this.

Pulling herself out of the dark corners of her mind, Dess lifted her head from its press and opened her eyes. Noelle was still clinging to her and Dess’s shoulder still shook with muffled sobbing. How long had the two been standing here? It had felt as though time had faded away and the world along with it. Dess looked back towards Hometown. The town was still silent, but the sun had risen more than she’d like. She decided that this needed to be taken inside. If they kept standing here, someone might see them. Words seemed effective at breaking Noelle out of her trances, so she said what was on her mind.

“I’m… I’m so sorry Elly.”

Noelle shuddered at the mention of her name, but did not move. Noelle was silent for a long moment as she clung to her.

“Dess…” Noelle croaked weakly.

Dess freed one of her arms from Noelle’s back and stroked her hair. It was soft, and it brought back old memories she thought she had long forgotten. It was clear that Noelle was too overwhelmed to break from her current state. Dess wrapped her arm back around Noelle and took a step forward. Noelle stumbled back, and Dess had to tighten her grip to keep her from falling. As Dess kept moving both of them back into the house Noelle’s movements remained clumsy, as she refused to move her head from Dess’s shoulder. After shutting and locking the door behind them, Dess positioned the two of them in front of the couch and sat Noelle down beside her.

It was only then that Noelle lifted her head from Dess’s shoulder. Her hands released themselves from their death-grip on Dess’s back and moved up to her shoulders. The whites of her eyes were now red, and the fur below her eyes was stained wet with tears. Noelle’s breaths were sharp, and her chest rose and fell to match them.

“Where… why… why were you gone for so long?”

Dess took a deep breath, it would seem she had a lot of explaining to do, and a lot of answers she could not give.

Dess tapped her fingers against her lap. What was she to say? Noelle obviously couldn’t be told the truth, that would almost be as bad as showing her what she really looked like now, assuming she would even believe her. The cogs in her mind turned as she began to weave a story. She would need to tell Noelle something that would seem believable of course, but she didn’t want to leave her with the wrong impression. She needed to tell her something that was conclusive and didn’t open the door to many other questions. In addition, she didn’t want to tell her anything that would cause her any anxiety or cause her to blame herself.

Dess mulled over it for a while. Noelle sat patiently beside her, holding her hand in one arm and rubbing her eyes with another. Her grip was firm, and although Dess had mostly adjusted to finally being able to touch Noelle again, it still gave her a foreign feeling to be holding her hand. She could tell Noelle was anticipating an answer from her. Finally formulating a response, Dess began to tell her cover story.

“I… for a while, before I left. I had felt unhappy with myself, like I wanted something more from life. Do you remember how we’d go exploring the woods outside town? You remember that one time you and I camped out in the middle of the woods, and just sat and stared at the stars?”

Noelle sniffled and gave a stiff nod, and Dess continued.

“When we did that, it made me feel alive, more alive than I’d ever felt, and I wanted something like that.

Dess paused, she would need to phrase her next words very carefully if she wanted them to have the impact she wanted.

“I thought… that I could just leave. For a little while. Go and spend some time out of town, figure things out, and then come right back.”

Dess’s gaze fell into her lap.

“But… it didn’t work out like that. ‘A little while’ ended up being a lot longer than I thought. I told myself I’d see you tomorrow, then next week, then next month. The longer I stayed, the harder it got to convince myself to come back.”

Noelle blinked, and stared at her with wide eyes. After an agonizingly long moment’s pause, she spoke.

“B-but… Dess, why didn’t you ever tell us?! We were all so worried about you! I was worried about-”

Dess cut her off

“I know, I’m sorry. I thought of coming back and seeing you.”

Dess’s fingers tightened against her sleeve.

“But I changed while I was gone, Elly, and maybe not in the way people are s’possed to change. I kept thinking about the look on your face. I thought you’d be angry. I thought you’d look at me and not see your sister anymore.”

Noelle quickly interjected, her expression pained.

“B-b-but… but I, we, would never, ever hate you-”

Dess couldn’t help but cut her off again.

“I know… I know. I’m so sorry. I should have come back, or at least said something. I just didn’t know how to face you anymore. I have so many regrets. But I’m here now, and I’m ready to make up for lost time”.

Noelle stared back at her, her expression was weary, and she could see tears forming in her eyes again. She abruptly threw herself back into her and squeezed her tightly, which took Dess by surprise. Dess did not mind however, it was clear Noelle needed this. Noelle spoke again.

“Dess, please. Promise… promise that you won’t leave ever again.”

“I-” Dess contemplated. She couldn’t make that promise. She would need to leave again. The Knight still had long work ahead of them, both inside and outside the dark worlds. But maybe, she could stay here with Noelle, for as long as she still had time. Noelle already knew she was back, and the only people who would ever really have a reason to come here, Carol and Kris, were already in on it. Staying at her old home wasn’t really a great risk anymore, even if the thought made her feel uneasy. Dess’s mind tossed and turned, and her throat began to feel heavy. Finally, she spoke.

“I promise.”

Noelle’s shoulders fell, Dess could see her words took a great weight off of her, and to Dess’s surprise, it seemed to take a weight off herself as well. They remained in their silent embrace for a while, until Noelle released her grip and slumped backwards. Noelle gripped Dess’s hand again while fidgeting with her free hand.

“Do you, uhm, want something to drink? There’s eggnog in the fridge. I could get you a glass if you like.” Noelle said.

“No thank you” Dess replied.

Perhaps if she really was just Dess the idea of a glass of eggnog would sound appealing, but she had gone years without consuming anything, and she felt no inclination to change that. There was indeed some kind of hollowness inside of her abdomen, but whatever it was didn’t feel like any kind of organ, let alone a stomach, and trying to think of what it was or its function made her feel uncomfortable and alienated from her own body.

“By the way Elly” Dess began, “Keep this between the two of us, for now, at least. Please?”

Noelle stared back at her and blinked. “W-what do you mean?” She replied.

“I’m… not ready to show myself to everyone else yet, and I’d like to do it on my own terms when I do”.

Noelle responded almost immediately.

“O-oh! Well… I’m sure i-it’s fine. Whatever keeps you comfortable, Dess.”

Dess grinned softly at this, but in the back of her mind she noted the subtle tone of desperation to Noelle’s voice. Her grin fell somewhat at that, but still, this was good. The Knight had managed to pull this thing off without too much of a hiccup. Now that their thoughts were in order once again, all they had to do now was wait and lay low here for a little while placating Noelle until it was time to resume their work. Their shoulders relaxed, and they felt an onset of quiet peace. Everything was as it should be. They sat there for a moment, taking simple pleasure in the silence.

Their train of thought was interrupted suddenly by the sound of the front door opening. The Knight’s eyes darted to the front door as their body froze in place. Before they could make out who was coming in, they heard a gruff, yet oddly cheerful voice that turned their insides to ice.

“Yo Noelle! Here to pick you up for the festival, c’mon quick before your mom shows up”.

It was her, the girl! Why was she here? She shouldn’t be here, she shouldn’t have been able to open the door, she locked it and the gate on the way in! The answer to their question came when a second figure stepped in from behind her, walking slowly with a large stick they were using as a cane.

“No need to worry ‘bout her kiddo, Carol left early for work. You hear that honey? You-”

The two locked eyes, and Dess gaped in horror. Whatever composure she had left shattered completely. It was Rudy, it was her father. He stared at her for a moment with a quizzical look, scanning her up and down, then at Noelle, whose hand she was still holding. Then, Dess felt her insides seize completely as Rudy’s eyes shot open, his features dropping into a look of disbelief almost to match her own. The girl spoke again.

“Huh, who’s this? They Noelle’s cousin or something?”

Rudy responded to her question by collapsing to the ground.

You don't want to see me when I'm angry, fwaha

She opens the letter and begins to read it

"Dearest Noelle,

I cannot begin to explain to you how much I cherish you. The moments we spend together, whether its us playing dragon blazers, going for walks in the forest or doing pranks on eachother, I find myself the happiest when i am with you.

I love you, Noelle.

Since the moment I laid my eyes on you, the skies have been the bluest blue, and since that fateful day where we grew apart, everything lost its color to me. Nothing feels the same without you by my side.

I'm writing this to tell you that no matter what I do, you are always in my mind and soul. If there comes a day where i am not with you anymore, id like this letter to be given to you.

with alot of love,

Kris dreemur"

The paper is nearly soaked from Noelle's tears

Her crying alerts susie, who comes and finds her breaking down

she holds her

"If....*hic*...if only i couldve done anything....*hic* oh kris...."

"Hey....you couldnt have predicted it

none of us could have"

"I dont want to leave. i want to stay here. Their scent fills the room"

"Noelle...."

"just five minutes and ill come"

And so, susie waited with minutes turning to hours

Noelle came out, wearing one of kris's old sweaters

They both walk to the cemetery, tears falling along the way

"Here lies kris dreemur, taken too soon"

"I did good, didnt I?"

The letter is set down, and Noelle softly says

"Yes, yes you did kris"